Mother in law problems

fudgecat

Hi, if you have moved into a doer upper house, how are you coping with that in a wheelchair? Is the whole house accessible to you? Do you drive? How often do you get out to visit your family on your own? Is your kitchen being designed around your needs with appropriate and accessible heights?
Why are you trying for a baby in such a toxic situation? If you feel compromised and ignored now, how will you feel when you are beaten down by exhaustion looking after a baby (and you will be - both of you)? Can you visualise MIL steaming in and taking over the baby "to give you a rest" or "because it is so hard for you to cope". What were you like before you married? If you are a professional person, I`m guessing less of a doormat than you appear to be becoming? Have you changed for the better in this situation? MIL must be in her late 50s early 60s - same as me. So ask her how many IT magazines she read, what protest marches she joined, did she refuse to use coloured loo paper or eat South African apples? What festivals did she attend? Was she a Rock Against Racism fan? Pride activist? Feminist? It will annoy the hell out of her. It certainly did my son-in-law`s mum! I think I know the answers...

Out,_Vile_Jelly

A friend of mine wasted years of her life on a clever, good looking, successful guy who also happened to be a horrific Mummy's Boy and classic example of an only child. Superficially he seemed normal, good company. But his upbringing had left him not quite right. He took his washing home to his mum to do. He ate out every night because he literally couldn't cook. He wouldn't book a holiday without running it past Mummy first. My friend stuck it out because, like so many women, she thought she was the one to change him. She couldn't because he was fundamentally broken.

It's very simple; a man can be a good, supportive son and buy his own kitchen unassisted. Your husband has to understand that concept before anything can change.

You could try a trial period in which you and your husband agree to invite his parents round for two Sundays per month; with the other two firmly booked for you two to do something as a couple. If he cannot keep this arrangement then you are going to have to seriously review your options.

It sounds like an exhausting, toxic way to live. Do you have any friends nearby or anyone to confide in at work?

Loz01

liuhutOz wrote: »

https://community.babycenter.com/post/a62791180/mil-ruining-vacay-541?cpg=1

Have a look at this thread. Its about a MIL that goes on holiday with a couple and the woman does a bunk from the hotel! Might give you a few ideas :-)

Ive lost the plot on OP's thread but this ^^ IS GOLD.