We're aware that some users are experiencing technical issues which the team are working to resolve. Thank you for your patience.
📨 Have you signed up to the Forum's new Email Digest yet? Get a selection of trending threads sent straight to your inbox daily, weekly or monthly!

Self help thread. I am a widow coping getting on with it

Options
15253555758109

Comments

  • That is true but to be honest I'd be more worried about the hassle than the cash, of course the cash would be a nice bonus. Unless the market goes mad locally I haven't made that much, bought at the top of the market and probably only worth about £20k more now.


    No definite plans yet just ideas I'm playing with.
  • lessonlearned
    lessonlearned Posts: 13,337 Forumite
    10,000 Posts Combo Breaker I've been Money Tipped!
    Humpty.....I know what you mean about the hassle.

    I am off to see the solicitor this morning, it has been a frenzy of acticivity this last week. I have spent hours filling in forms, collating all my paperwork etc for the solicitor and the broker. And the coming week will be the same, with surveyors etc coming here for the buyers. I also need to start getting quotes for removals etc.

    I have woken up with a serious case of butterflies in my tummy this morning. The enormity of what I am about to do is just starting to hit me. This is the first time I have moved House entirely on my own since I was 30. I was a lot fitter and stronger then. :p.

    If truth be told I am finding it all a tad scary........wondering how I will cope. The boys are no longer single and fancy free, they have commitments, especially DS1 who will have a new baby, and they will not be able to help as much this time round.

    I have already decided I will let the movers do everything, packing as well as moving. I'm not even going to attempt any heavy lifting. And once I get into the new house then I will just have to pace myself and not do my usual "bull at a gate, race to get everything straight".

    I will just have to set aside a budget to buy in help where needed, especially with some of the decorating, I have to learn I can no longer do everything myself. Thank goodness I'm doing it now. I really don't think I could cope if I was 80. :rotfl:
  • Elona_2
    Elona_2 Posts: 361 Forumite
    Seventh Anniversary 100 Posts Name Dropper
    LL

    I cried when I was first alone in the chalet bungalow as so much needed doing to it. Two years later I realise that having a project did me good and helped me realise I could do more than I thought .

    Still need to get the creeping bamboo eradicated and will phone them tomorrow. Baby travel system is just about to be delivered and can see a van outside. Four big boxes have just been put in the hall for now and need to ask if dd and sil want me to keep it here for now.

    I have been dithering over buying a new vacuum and keeping the Henry for bigger jobs as it is quite heavy and have just found one I like the look of that should be lighter to use so bit the bullet and ordered it.

    Hugs to all
  • lessonlearned
    lessonlearned Posts: 13,337 Forumite
    10,000 Posts Combo Breaker I've been Money Tipped!
    edited 30 May 2018 at 3:23PM
    Elona. Yes I can understand your tears when you first moved. I probably will cry too. To be honest even just viewing some houses makes me want to bawl my eyes out. Some of them are just so awful.

    When I think of the lovely family home I had to sell I could weep......oh well that was then and this is now. We can't live in the past.

    I think you are right, it will probably take a good two years to make my new house feel like a comfortable home. I will just grit my teeth and get on with it. And, yes maybe having a project will be good. A fresh start and hopefully a new and more fulfilling and satisfying life with my new home as the launching pad.

    I have been ploughing on with stuff. Last night I couldn't sleep so after I got rid of the purchasers surveyors I went and had a little nap because I was feeling so drained, lightheaded and woozy

    I've got a Henry but as you say he is very heavy. I did buy a turbo head for it and it makes it easier to use, it's just heavy to lift up and down the stairs.

    I'll make do for now and maybe have a rethink when I've moved. The one big plus about the new house is there is plenty of storage, so I could have two hoovers, one for upstairs and one for downstairs.
  • Elona_2
    Elona_2 Posts: 361 Forumite
    Seventh Anniversary 100 Posts Name Dropper
    LL

    I am so glad I have the integral garage for storage as I am about to lug four big boxes of baby cot, car seat and buggy in there before I go off to York to see older single dd who has been poorly. At some point I need to get the floor nicely covered and finish tidying and sorting.

    Although it has been two years or just over since I moved I still find it difficult when the bus takes me past the big family house we lived in for five years as it was our "forever house" to welcome future grandchildren and family and to grow old together. I usually have to focus on a book or magazine or look the other way as we pass.

    I decided when I moved here that if something needed doing or a gadget would make my life easier then I was going to go for it, obviously waiting for special offers or deals and making sure I could afford it. All the family now take every opportunity to celebrate anything and everything as we realise life is just too damn short!

    Fingers crossed that things go smoothly for you with the house sale, purchase and move.

    Hugs to all
  • humptydumptybits
    humptydumptybits Posts: 2,992 Forumite
    Elona I smile when I think of buggies, I've got 6 GC and all the buggies seemed to work in a different way. I went out shopping one day and got the buggy out and got it all assembled and baby safely strapped in. All good but then I couldn't fold the thing up at the end, eventually a young mum came and showed me a button I hadn't spotted. I swear you need an engineering degree with some of them, not like my old McLaren umbrella buggy. Good luck with yours.
  • [Deleted User]
    [Deleted User] Posts: 12,492 Forumite
    10,000 Posts Combo Breaker
    elona, the first things I bought for my first grandchild was a babygro and then a complete buggy system.:)


    Oh LL I do feel for you, the ups and downs just now but remember that fate had a hand in this and you will get through.Reading about your emotions Elona, it was good for me, knowing that it is not just us as individuals. I must say that we are brave, marching along although our steps do falter


    I just saw one online that dd had already thought would be perfect, too late to ring the EA but I want to arrange a viewing next week. It is a brand new build of 7 on a lovely development on the edge of a village. I am absolutely not going to build this up in my head, it is in an area I don`t know although dd says it is lovely. I would have to re-think my furniture but will cross that bridge if I take this forward. S facing back, PV panels, underfloor air source heating, wooden floors. Tbh the stuff that I want and surely big enough.I wanted a home built by a small developer, had one twice and they were/are lovely. I am trying not to build this up in my head
  • Elona_2
    Elona_2 Posts: 361 Forumite
    Seventh Anniversary 100 Posts Name Dropper
    kittie

    This is going to sound eccentric but maybe view the house as if you were looking at it for a relative or friend and making a list of the pro's and con's and keeping a sharp eye out for anything you cannot change like location, whether overlooked, facilities like a shop, doctor, dentist, and transport systems.

    After spending the last three days rushing round in the heat I feel quite shattered so am going to have a quiet day and maybe try to get a hairdressing appointment locally today or tomorrow as I hacked at my fringe and need sorting out!

    After buying a few things for older twin yesterday I had a look online and ordered two maternity tops and two dresses for married twin which should be delivered tomorrow and she can have a look at them on Sunday. If they are not suitable then I will gladly send them back but if anything is right for her then she is welcome to any or all. What with the hot weather and her getting much bigger , clothes shopping is tiring for her and I want to help.

    I agreed to keep the baby travel system at my house for the next few months and also to store a couple of pieces of furniture for dd and sil as they are finishing off rearranging their house ready for baby.

    Hugs to all
  • [Deleted User]
    [Deleted User] Posts: 12,492 Forumite
    10,000 Posts Combo Breaker
    a quick post, just back and am getting lunch


    far too rural and too small a footprint for the cost. Wonderful quality but no separate space downstairs for justin. Will catch up in an hour
  • [Deleted User]
    [Deleted User] Posts: 12,492 Forumite
    10,000 Posts Combo Breaker
    The mendips are now ruled out, lovely quiet cycling lanes but nothing suitable for me now in my 7th decade. Gorgeous villages but expensive and not much going on. Dorset also ruled out, far too expensive. Doh honestly the base line is 2 miles away from me, the right mix of rural and access to facilities. I will carry on looking with an open mind Elona, this last stage has to be so right and to be perfectly honest, if I giving up my allotment as in moving further away, then I would want a suitable garden but local I could have a smaller garden while keeping my allotment


    Following inspiration from some of you, I am well prepared to roll my sleeves up and re-vamp as required
Meet your Ambassadors

🚀 Getting Started

Hi new member!

Our Getting Started Guide will help you get the most out of the Forum

Categories

  • All Categories
  • 350.6K Banking & Borrowing
  • 253K Reduce Debt & Boost Income
  • 453.4K Spending & Discounts
  • 243.6K Work, Benefits & Business
  • 598.4K Mortgages, Homes & Bills
  • 176.8K Life & Family
  • 256.8K Travel & Transport
  • 1.5M Hobbies & Leisure
  • 16.1K Discuss & Feedback
  • 37.6K Read-Only Boards

Is this how you want to be seen?

We see you are using a default avatar. It takes only a few seconds to pick a picture.