Self help thread. I am a widow coping getting on with it

lessonlearned

Hi Kittie......the one thing I would suggest you take a note of is access...so think about steps etc, also if it is on split levels, you might need to raise or drop floors.

I know it sounds a bit premature but if you are knocking the place to bits anyway then maybe consider widening door frames, and check that any corridors or hallways have enough room to maneourve a wheelchair or walking frame.

Is the staircase wide enough to take a stair lift, although domestic lifts are really coming into their own now.,....see how the Boomer generation has learned from the mistakes our parents made. Our lot are definitely taking more care about trying to age well in our own homes. Our parents never expected to live as long as they did. We know we are likely to be abrojnd well into our 90s so we need to be prepared.

A domestic lift can be bought for around £12k. Cheaper than moving....

If you are using an architect then just tell them you are looking to future proof your house and they should know of all sorts of little wheezes to help you, especially as you will be upgrading the electrics you can take advantage of getting things like lighting etc more automated. You will be able to control a lot of functions from your laptop.

Maybe think about underfloor heating, solar panels. It is cheaper to add these things at the rebuilding stage rather than retro fitting them later.

And although you have ruled out over 55s developments but I suggest you continue to visit a few because you will get lots of ideas, similarly new build apartments will have ideas you can copy.

If you want to pm me the Rightmove link, I will be happy to run my eye over it.

I know you are a tad nervous but I feel certain you will rise to the challenge. Get this right and you will be set upi for a comfortable and happy retirement, safe in the knowledge your home will meet your changing needs,

I have arranged for an EA to come on Monday. I want to pick their brains, I am also speaking to my go to guys to get the last few jobs finished.

I may not market the house this year or at least I might wait until my college course is finished. I need to be careful not to over comit myself so I might wait until next spring. It all depends on the market.

There is a house just up the road for sale. I am watching it. I could piggy back it and get the benefit of the competition.....:rotfl:

I am actually getting excited now at the thought of moving.

I watched the Minimalist documentary film last night. I think it is called Minimalist AD. I can thoroughly recommend it. I wouldn’t want to be quite that radical but I am ready to embrace downsizing and simple living. I want a very different life now.

seven-day-weekend

As some of you may know, we downsized in 2015 to a bungalow. I would agree that location is of paramount importance. We got one of the three locations we wanted, near shops and on a frequent bus route.

We do have a large garden but that is what we wanted. When we can't do it, we will employ a gardener.

The bungalow was a do-er-upper but we didn't mind thta, it meant we could make it ours.

The only compromise is that I would have liked a full utility room instead of the alcove we have, and ideally one more room for a study. Buy hey, in the end those things are not really important (at least not to us). The location and the fact that it was a bungalow and had a drive (never had one before!) were the absolute must-haves.

I appreciate it must be much harder doing it on your own but I wish all of you who are moving a good experience and the house of your dreams. x

Special hugs to Torry x

[Deleted User]

I am so grateful to you for all this help, your suggestions will be on my list. I just re-read that there is no chain and I have no chain and have cash in the bank. I am 90% sure of this property, even now but I rest easy knowing that if it isn`t right then I already have a nice home and can bide my time. The bus stop is right outside the house front and there is a field behind, development is not allowed behind, the house is on the limits, no wonder people never moved. There are such lovely views in both directions

If it is right and yes it is level, then I will start by offering 10% less and I am hoping it is probate. LL yes I will pm the link, later after the viewing, I have some jobs to do first

The surveyor/architect has a string of prestigious awards and I am thinking that designing a future proofed home has to be good for him too, so many of us are on that ladder.

[Deleted User]

I am leaving in an hour, have butterflies and cannot eat. I am also tearful, haven`t been like this for some time. I need to look for my rescue remedy. Its a heavy load, no wonder people stay put. All I want to see now is a white feather

lessonlearned

Just take a deep breath......you are only viewing, not committing yourself to anything at this stage. Just take it one step at a time. If it isn’t right, then move on to the next.

Just been for a Swedish massage. I tried to save money by reducing my visits to once a month, big mistake. I have been in agony this past couple of weeks. I obviously need more regular treatments so I will just have to budget for them. I am fed up feeling like a 90 year old.

I spent so long caring for my husband I ruined my own health and wrecked my body with all that lifting. I am determined to get fitter and if that means coughing up for a weekly massage to keep me more mobile and reduce pain then so be it.

Looked at my smart meter history, I am over £250 in credit at the end of what has been a harsh winter. I have decided not to apply for a refund but just to let it ride. I can relax then knowing I don’t have to increase my payments any time soon and need not worry about next winters heating bills.

Nice sunny day here although still a bit too chilly for sitting out in the garden. I might try and go for a walk although my knee is giving me gyp. I will have to strap it up again.

Oh the joys of aging. As Bette Davis said.....getting old ain’t for cissies. But as we all know aging is a privilege denied to many. Our poor husbands never made it. My poor darling was just 57. I am determined to live a good life in his memory.

Elona_2

kittie

Sending positive vibes for today and hope you find out something useful even if the house is not for you.

LL
I went to York to see a dd and after doing a lot of walking then standing waiting for a bus for half an hour I was in so much pain I just got a taxi home. Now putting my feet up with a cup of tea and then going to look at the vibra plate that just arrived. I am hoping that using it will help my sore joints and encourage me to get more exercise. The freeze relief sprays should help too.

Hugs to all

[Deleted User]

It was awful, nothing like the estate agents photos. Decrepit, damp, stairs steep and 4" treads, pokey rooms, rubbish garage and a massive amount of work needed plus constant road hum. Sigh. I am going to be more patient, I was talked into this, got sucked in and I believed them

lessonlearned

Elona.....sorry to hear you are in such pain. I did manage 5k steps so far today. I know we should be doing 10k but given the state of my knee today I am pleased with what I have achieved.

Kittie.....who says the camera never lies.:rotfl: I am afraid all too often a house looks ok on paper and then when you see it .......:eek: EAs are very good at making something look and sound good. I have decided that unless I know the actual street then in future I will view a property from the outside first before I even bother to arrange an internal inspection. When I was looking before I got so disheartened I gave up and bought my sons house in the end.

At least you have seen it and can now rule it out. Whilst you can rip apart a house and start again you can do nothing about the road hum. I have to say I could cope with just about anything except road noise.
Peace and quiet is at the absolute top of my wish list.

Elona_2

kittie

You now know who not to trust!! I am sorry the place was such a disappointment but at least you know your critical faculties are intact.

I used to tell myself that at least every disappointing viewing meant I realised ever more clearly what I did not want. The last two houses I found almost by accident, one by driving past just as the board was being put up outside and the other by a friend suggesting it as I had not found it come up on Rightmove as it was described as a house rather than a chalet bungalow.

White_musk

Oh Kittie I'm so sorry. Like LL top of my list is peace and quiet. My house is on a very small street and one end of the road leads onto the back lane of another row of houses, so few cars come down our street, also as I've said, I live in a village so more peace and quiet. EA can be lower than snakes belly when it comes to marketing houses and sadly they've caught you out. Nasty trick!

Absolutely beautiful day today, washing done and out and all in now dry. Lovely. After moving at the end of January, I can now say officially, all boxes and bags are unpacked and put away. I finished the last today. I did have to laugh at myself though, I found a bag full of stuff that should have been thrown away from the last house. I'm guessing I've thrown away a bag that was supposed to come and brought a bag of rubbish. Oh well, I've not noticed anything missing or needed something and can't find it, so we shall have to wait and see if I suddenly want something and find it's not here.

Torry (((hugs)))

Hugs