Wife taking surname

[Deleted User]

moneyistooshorttomention wrote: »

Ever heard of wedding rings? - which both partners wear these days.

Not necessarily. I don't wear a wedding ring, but my husband does.

I have never liked wearing jewellery. I used to wear one, but it got so old and battered I had to take it off. We bought a new ring, but I never wear it. It is in a drawer in the bedroom.

Mojisola

Cheeseface wrote: »

I feel like I’m playing devil’s advocate but I’m a Ms. Mainly because I don’t want making assumptions about my personal life in my professional life.

I've used Ms since the 1970s and didn't change when I got married.

Men use Mr whether they are single or married - can't see any point in women having to announce their marital status to the world every time they give their name or fill in a form.

moneyistooshorttomention

I think we've all forgotten the "wild card" too.

That being that some couples that get married are both the same sex as each other. Now it's never occurred to me to wonder what they do about surnames as I dont know any.....guessing they each keep their own?

Pollycat

moneyistooshorttomention wrote: »

Ever heard of wedding rings? - which both partners wear these days.

Spider_In_The_Bath wrote: »

Not necessarily. I don't wear a wedding ring, but my husband does.

I have never liked wearing jewellery. I used to wear one, but it got so old and battered I had to take it off. We bought a new ring, but I never wear it. It is in a drawer in the bedroom.

My husband doesn't wear a wedding ring.
Thinking through my friends, only one of the husbands wears a ring.

Mojisola

Pollycat wrote: »

My husband doesn't wear a wedding ring.

Thinking through my friends, only one of the husbands wears a ring.

We had rings for the ceremony but that was the only time I wore mine.

My husband wore his for a while but, after catching it on things while working, he stopped wearing his as well.

moneyistooshorttomention

Pollycat wrote: »

My husband doesn't wear a wedding ring.
Thinking through my friends, only one of the husbands wears a ring.

I'm now trying to think if any of my friends have husbands that dont wear wedding rings. It's the norm amongst people I know for the man to do so.

Come to think of it - I've not studied the hands of men generally living around here and have just been assuming they do too - and I have a feeling a lot of them don't. I shall be studying their hands in future to check LOL.

Silvertabby

It's what works for you.

I took Mr S's surname, but I have friends who went for the double-barrelled option and one who kept her maiden name for professional reasons.

Mojisola

Silvertabby wrote: »

It's what works for you.

I took Mr S's surname, but I have friends who went for the double-barrelled option and one who kept her maiden name for professional reasons.

That seems to be the way it goes now.

Among the recently marrieds I know (last few years), one changed her name and is known as 'Mrs Husband's Name', one kept her own name but use the title 'Mrs' and the other three have stayed as 'Ms Own Surname'.

The ones who live in other European countries have double-barrelled as is the local tradition.

Gavin83

consumers_revenge wrote: »

Might not have changed how I feel as that's down to me but as I said and the poll shows I'm in the minority.

This is generally a very pro female/anti male forum so I wouldn’t take the views here as an indication of general society.

Of all the married couples I know there’s two who kept their own surname and all the rest the wife took the husbands surname. I don’t know anyone who took their wife’s surname, invented one or double barrelled. Of those women who kept their surname one was previously married (might have had a influence) and the other had a great surname so I can see why she wanted to keep it. It still very much seems to norm for the wife to take her husbands name. From a personal perspective I think it’s nice for a married couple to share a surname, especially if they have children. Just makes them seem more united.

I’m getting married soon and my wife to be will be taking my surname. Her choice, I wouldn’t actually be too fussed if she wanted to keep hers. However she doesn’t like her surname and it’s already double barrelled and she prefers mine.

moneyistooshorttomention wrote: »

It may well be that in some areas/education levels/etc taking "his" name predominates for instance - but maybe professional people in metropolitan areas have keeping their own name predominating?

The old Brexit argument of those who choose a certain way must be uneducated. For the record most people I know are educated to at least a degree level (I know a number educated to post grad level, including my fianc!) and primarily live in the London area and it’s still more common for the wife to take the husbands name. I’m not sure what my fianc! will do professionally but I’d imagine she’ll use her new surname.

p00hsticks

maman wrote: »

As an aside: For anyone that follows football, there seem to be a number of young British players coming through with double barrelled names.

I'm assuming it's because unmarried parents are becoming commonplace and they want to claim the relationship with both mum and dad.

Actually at least one case (Jake Forster-Caskey) is named after father (Darren Caskey) and step-father (Nickie Forster)
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jake_Forster-Caskey