When things hit rock bottom the only answer is to fight the way back up...

Sun_Addict

Lovely to read you had some fun time with the smalls

You remind me of me when I was younger with the cleaning, I was obsessive, would spend hours at it. I learned to relax as I got older though - especially when your eyesight starts getting worse and you don't notice the dust so much LOL

Could you perhaps do the Fly Lady thing where you have just a few tasks to do each day but it keeps you on top of things. It would probably appeal to your organised nature and allow you some time for relaxation.

Have a fab Sunday xx

mummytogirls

Weathers lovely at the moment isn't it HI! Im so glad you guys are getting out and about for nice walks, we did the same yesterday.

Have a lovely Sunday x

Suffolk_lass

Hi HI, just popping in to check how you are getting on. It's good to do some fun things, but only if you reduce some of the other things at the same time. I know it's your "comfort blanket" but doing some fun things should make you less anxious hun - look for that balance a bit.

Have a lovely day

Hiddenidenity

The weather is weird isn't it? At the start of the week I was fed up of rain and using the hot water bottles! We will be going out for a walk again later it looks lovely today.

Roast for dinner today. Have enough bits need using to make soup too.
Think I will need to pop out for nappies though so will see if I can see any reduced fresh fruit/veg.

The weekend goes to fast

UncannyScot

Have a lovely day missus

Hiddenidenity

Suffolk_lass wrote: »

Hi HI, just popping in to check how you are getting on. It's good to do some fun things, but only if you reduce some of the other things at the same time. I know it's your "comfort blanket" but doing some fun things should make you less anxious hun - look for that balance a bit.

Have a lovely day

Going out actually makes me so much worse

I feel like we bring germs in. If I don't clean the kids will get sick. The more we go out the more I clean. So much so I make my skin sore

It sounds so ridiculous saying it but it still doesn't change how I feel. It's more controlled in the sense now I do actually leave the house. After having youngest it got to the point other than hospital I never stepped outside. The kids hardly attended school and I got a fine. I only started to leave the house when I made the diary here and things really had hit the point I had no choice to change. So still quite early days.

charlies_tribe

Good afternoon HI. Just been catching up with your diary. How I wish I had the will power to do even a tenth of your cleaning every day! Some things I see you do daily get done here maybe monthly, twice a year or even yearly! (Insert embarrassed face here, lol) my skirting boards get run over with the Hoover nozzle every so often and when they look really bad.... painted! My anxiety/depression has made me the complete opposite, I just don't want to do it.

Could you maybe try do a a week to do 2 things alternately to see how you feel? Wash beds 1 day mop and shine floors the next? After all the children are washed and in clean pyjamas so it can't really be getting that dirty (my kids bedding usually crawls itself to the washer when I've been asking them to strip it for ages, they are older though and fully capable of doing it themselves).

I know how you feel about leaving the house. Last year I had to fetch the DC from school while dh was out and DD teacher wasn't going to let me have her, she was a new teacher and hadn't seen me in the few months she had been teaching DD. Luckily the other teachers did. It made me realise how much we had all missed out on.

Hope your having a lovely day with the little ones x

System

Hidden I think you do really well . I have read your previous diaries and you have been through a lot of things in the past 6 years .

You seem to be very settled and doing things you haven't been able to do for years.

Keep working at getting better you have made giant steps recently .

HairyHandofDartmoor

Making autumn pictures with the kids after a walk sounds lovely . I wish my kids were young enough to do that with, I miss that kind of fun.

I stay busy to stop anxiety too, my DH is always telling me to sit down and relax, but it's my way of coping. Just don't overdo it so you become ill, like the others have said.

It's really great that this site has helped you to leave the house, aren't we lucky MSE exists .

Hiddenidenity

MSE folks definitely make it easier, always someone around, always a reply/someone that understands. So greatful.

The day went as planned. Although youngest is quite poorly, its gradually creeped up over the last few days but it seems to have really taken a hold today. Spoke to the community nurses and they where happy with the step up I'd taken and someone will be out to visit in the morning. I hope I don't have to call in work so soon