To change or not to change my name?

Tammykitty

I changed my name on marriage but it was a difficult decision.


Any adult can change their name whenever they choose for whatever they choose.


What I don't agree is changing children's name because of divorce, new partners etc.
Parents should realize that when they register a child, they are giving that child a name for 18 year - until the child is old enough to change it themselves if they want.


Schools, doctors etc, should not accept instructions from one parent to use a different surname from the one on the birth certificate.


I know of a child that has had 5 surnames (although I suspect it wasn't legally changed) in about 15 years.

DigForVictory

As someone who enjoys scrambling around family trees, I am aware that when I & my sisters die, our name will end. No male heir to carry it on. Cousins likewise.

As the family tree bod, so long as your maiden name is not *lost* completely, no problem. Give the census takers a heart attack or something but make sure it's in there, alongside the married bit so we can figure out who you were in future decades. Who you choose to be known as at work, at home, on your passport, on your bank statement, on your driving licence? All your choice, (just please, consistent spelling?!).

The family joke is now that when I get a news of a family wedding, I'm apt to send the newcomer a postcard indicating who they're marrying into & a simple question "please tell me your maiden name & your mum's maiden name". It's Far Too Easy to 'loose' maiden names, and if yours is a dilly, OP, then I'd hang onto it.

I'd certainly hold one bank account in my maiden name as the eccentrics who let events slip their minds can then send a cheque to someone without a bank account...

Whatever you choose there will be talk. Swing with the punch - if you become a parent there will be Even More talk but in all honesty a birth certificate is So Clear that you can easily have different surnames & so long as there's a marriage registered too - what of it?

In your shoes, I'd hang onto it. Just because the *genealogists* in decades to come will be so pleased.

Mojisola

ladymarmalade wrote: »

And I certainly do not see it as submitting myself to him.

I don't think many women would see it as submitting themselves now but what it does do is make you part of his family.

tea_lover

Mojisola wrote: »

I don't think many women would see it as submitting themselves now but what it does do is make you part of his family.

Marrying someone makes you part of their family, not changing your name.

I haven't got the same surname as a single member of my family but I'm definitely still a member!

Mojisola

tea_lover wrote: »

Marrying someone makes you part of their family, not changing your name.

I haven't got the same surname as a single member of my family but I'm definitely still a member!

When we got married, we both became part of each others' families so why wouldn't we keep our family names?

The tradition of the name change for a woman came about because she was handed over during the marriage service from her family to his. After the marriage, she was part of his family.

Gloomendoom

Mojisola wrote: »

I don't think many women would see it as submitting themselves now but what it does do is make you part of his family.

And by marrying my wife I am now part of her family.

My wife is still her parent's daughter and her sisters' sister whatever she decides to call herself.