Am I being over sensitive

POPPYOSCAR

gabriel1980 wrote: »

Hahaha! Yeah right. You are being lied too.

You tell yourself that if it makes you feel better.

I know the truth.

gabriel1980

POPPYOSCAR wrote: »

Quite!

If someone has to be able to watch !!!!!! etc. in order to stay faithfull that is not the kind of relationship I would want to be in.

I think it's the only excuse for cheating to be honest.

Guest101

ripplyuk wrote: »

Gosh, is that really true? I thought it would be about 30%.

My partner said he has never watched !!!!!!. I've no reason to think he's lying as it's not something I've ever expressed a view on one way or the other.

I've never really given it much thought, but my gut feeling is that I don't like the thought of it at all. I can't imagine having sexual feelings for any other man than my partner so it would be hard to understand if he could.

Actually, I think the OP's reaction and words were very measured.

Honestly I can't obviously prove it, but I suspect youor partner is being nice to protect your feelings. And it could be that he hasn't since he met you, I'm not trying to cause upset.

But its really very prevelant. The problem is the stigma that is evident here makes people hide this behaviour.

I would say- if you've never tried it, how do you know for sure?

POPPYOSCAR

Guest101 wrote: »

Honestly I can't obviously prove it, but I suspect youor partner is being nice to protect your feelings. And it could be that he hasn't since he met you, I'm not trying to cause upset.

But its really very prevelant. The problem is the stigma that is evident here makes people hide this behaviour.

I would say- if you've never tried it, how do you know for sure?

I have absolutely no interest in watching other people having sex.

Bit like when our children see us cuddling, kissing etc. and giving each other 'that look' they go 'urrh, get a room'!

ChicaBonita

My current partner says he doesn't like !!!!!!, and he doesn't watch it or view pictures. Now, whether he says that to cover my feelings, I don't know or particularly care because it wouldn't bother me either way.

My ex-partner liked to watch it, I've watched it in the past, not so bothered now.

I think it's only an issue when you become fixated with it, and where it colours your view of relationships and how a physical relationship should be.

IMHO, of course.

I think an adult male with an adult picture on his ipad is not to be unexpected....

ripplyuk

Can't guys just use their imagination instead?

I don't need to try it to know it doesn't interest me. There's enough sex scenes in regular TV/movies for me to know that.

Bogalot

ripplyuk wrote: »

Can't guys just use their imagination instead?

I don't need to try it to know it doesn't interest me. There's enough sex scenes in regular TV/movies for me to know that.

Where does imagination come from? I'd say past experiences, so would you rather he have a tom tank thinking about his ex?

ripplyuk

Bogalot wrote: »

Where does imagination come from? I'd say past experiences, so would you rather he have a tom tank thinking about his ex?

Can they not imagine their current partner?

Is it not better to think about someone you love, than an ex, or a random couple in a !!!!!! movie?

jamiehelsinki

Lioness_Twinkletoes wrote: »

Oh my God, really? Do you honestly believe this? I've been married for 25 years and I've been attracted to a few men other than my husband. I've had sexual thoughts and feelings for them. Never acted on them, never would. Does the fact that I am a normal woman with normal desires make me a bad person in your book?

If so, you have a very narrow view of the world and frankly, you're living in cloud cuckoo land.

Pretty normal I would say, as long as you don't act on those feelings.

I think I have had a few periods in the early stages of relationships where I'm so wrapped up in the girl to even notice anyone else but this phase soon passes and pretty much like you the rest of the time.

Ames

ripplyuk wrote: »

Can't guys just use their imagination instead?

I don't need to try it to know it doesn't interest me. There's enough sex scenes in regular TV/movies for me to know that.

I think it's just down to how men and women's brains work. Men tend to need more visual stuff, women use imagination more. It's why Shades of Gray and erotic fiction is aimed at women more than men (and why the writers tend to be women, or at least have female names), and !!!!!! video sites are aimed at men. It's just a hunch, but I wouldn't be surprised if statistics showed more men watch !!!!!! and more women read it.

Of course I'm only talking in very general terms, some women will watch !!!!!!, some men will read it, and there'll be loads in between who do a bit of both.