17 y/o girl and 29 y/o guy? should the guy know better?

Domayne

If you both like each other and have things in common, go for it! Age is just a number and who cares what other people think.
When I was 16, I was seeing this guy who was 42 at the time, he was married with kids but he owned a shop and gave me free things...until he got me drunk, arrested and then told me to stay away from him because I was too much trouble :rotfl:
Anyway that was probably a mistake but I have 0 regrets, we both probably learnt a lesson and I have some funny stories from that time. People think too much and live in 'what if...' just do it...could work, might not, but at least you tried and will probably learn something

CruisingSaver

joeblags wrote: »

you never know, it could be your daughter hes trying to seduce.

Nope! Luckily for him my daughter has very different interests and aspirations to the girl described by the OP.

Lily-Rose_3

Hmmmm, tricky one.

When my daughter was 17, I would have been mortified if a 30 year old man had been gunning for her. The age gap isn't bad, but it's just the fact that she is only 17. That is very young. My daughter has always been fairly sensible and grown up, but even she - at 17 - was quite immature, angsty, moody at times, and interested only in video games, messing about on her laptop and phone, and backpacking and partying with her pals. She was also looking forward to going to uni, freshers parties, getting involved in uni activities and clubs etc. What a 30 year old man can possibly have in common with a teenager just eludes me.

I know some 17 year olds are very mature and old for their age, but they are very very rare, and the 'I got married at 17 and had 3 kids by 21,' chestnut that some people come out with when this subject arises really doesn't wash sorry. 17 is too young to settle down. Fact. Maybe back in days of old, when girls had little to look forward to, weren't able/allowed to forge a career, and weren't lined up to go to uni, getting married to a man (no matter what his age) was the preferred option. But now, who the heck would want to be settling down into marriage and babies whilst still in your teens?

All this said, the OP met this lass a few days ago, so all this is immaterial anyway!

joeblags

I know somebody who fits your profile, has the same interests as you, and I feel you would both get along just fine.


http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-3576790/Muscle-obsessed-pervert-dubbed-Purple-Aki-barred-ten-years-grabbing-men-s-biceps-ban-LIFTED-vowing-reinvent-himself.html


you never know, he might be gentle with you.

piglet25

When I started infant school my partner was out on the town drinking and clubbing, age has never made a difference to us and I have always gone for older men, they are just more mature.

missbiggles1

bugslet wrote: »

I was just 21,when I started going out with Mr Bugs who was 43, very nearly 44. It was fair to say that me parents were not happy, but we still managed 28 years together, so the age gap was irrelevant really.

However I was a very mature 21 and he was young at heart so it worked; I'm not sure this and from previous posts that either of you are terrifically mature. Keep in contact and see where it goes, but I'd not be rushing into things.

But, if you'd met him 4 years earlier, things might have been very different - that was my point.:)

Fireflyaway

When I was 15 I dated a 20 year old guy. At the time I saw no issues with it and looking back I still believe we were similar on the maturity scale. However no way now I'm a mum would I allow my daughter to do the same!! If a woman is 30 and her husband 50 not such a big deal but at 17 you have no experience so even a 5 year gap is a bigger deal. Everyone is different only you can judge if she is mature enough and most importantly not vulnerable. I would be questioning why you don't go for someone your own age? She must still be in education etc? That's a bit weird. Wouldn't you prefer someone more in tune age wise? Also people change so fast at that age. Its more likely you will grow apart as she matures.

unholyangel

imo, a person doesn't reach proper maturity until they're around 25 years old.

18 is still a teenager. Early 20's you still make mistakes etc as you don't have the life experience. But by 25, you're really not going to change majorly short of perhaps a mid life crisis.

I think you (OP) are kidding yourself that its all innocent else you wouldn't have been asking so quickly when her 18th is.

Like others, its not the age gap thats a problem imo, its just how young she is compared to how old you are.

[Deleted User]

If this discussion continues, you could both be pensioners before it's resolved and then it probably wouldn't matter anyway, athough the age gap would still be there.

I should add that Mrs Sleazy is considerably younger than me although we didn't get together until she was 30. People still commented, although now (15 years later), they don't. The age gap between me and her is the same as between me and her parents - I believe they originally had reservations but we get on fine, especially when they see their daughter happy.

From a personal viewpoint - would I have gone into a relationship with her when she was 17? Probably not.

seven-day-weekend

When my friend got married for the second time, he was 36. His wife was 18.

They are very happy together, still together after six years of marriage.

Not a problem.

When my son met his partner, he was 26 and she was 19. They have been together for ten years.

Depends upon the people concerned,and the relationship.