Changing dating strategy? Any ideas please?

indiepanda

Smartsaver7 wrote: »

Believe me you are in a minority , I once looked at the inbox of a female pal and she had 40 odd messages with Hi / Hello she told me she had no need to contact anyone she just waded through the list each day , she did say if the message had the title Hello <her name> she was more likely to read it.

Ah, I got fussy after a while, you had to both mention name and say something which made it clear you'd got past my name on the profile, and have an interesting profile yourself before I would respond. I wasted too much time trying to be polite to people who had only sent a generic message or who were clearly not going to stand a chance - e.g. young enough to be my son or old enough to be my father.

My view is if someone doesn't have a fairly clear idea of what they want and target their messages to people who fit the bill, it generally either means they are desperate to go out with anyone or just looking for a quick fling so don't much care beyond looks.

Oh and why do men think it's going to impress me if they say something totally unimaginative like "you're pretty"... I mean, I take it as read someone didn't look at my profile and think "she looks ugly, I'll message her". And how do you respond "oh, you're handsome"? It's not exactly a conversation starter.

Am remembering all the stuff I didn't like about it now! Guess no bad thing am giving it a rest.:)

smudger1964

Gloomendoom wrote: »

What did people do before the internet?

Genuine question.

years ago about 1988 there was something called Dateline where you sent them some money and they posted you a list of 6 girls numbers and you phoned them and went out for a date..

Does anyone else remember this .I met my wife through this..that lasted 20 years the marriage that was..

Smartsaver7

I remember the name but was still young enough well 25 to do the bars and nightclubs wasn't one called Dateline London

boliston

I seem to remember using dateline in the early 90s as i met someone i was with for about 6 months through it - i can't remember the cost of it but i guess most dating is now "free" - paying for dating now would be like paying to be on social networking lol

Smartsaver7

boliston wrote: »

I seem to remember using dateline in the early 90s as i met someone i was with for about 6 months through it - i can't remember the cost of it but i guess most dating is now "free" - paying for dating now would be like paying to be on social networking lol

You get what you pay for or don't pay for, if you want the free tinder experience fine, if you want a more bespoke service or some guarantee people genuine join a site that people pay to use.

KnightRider

My experience seems to be different from what I've read on here and other places (for a guy) - I seem to get a lot of messages from women who only say "hello" or "I like your profile". I used to make an effort to get them chatting but now I just tend to say "hello" back or "thanks". I've even had that from those whose profiles say "if you message me you better say more than just hi"! I don't get 40 messages a week - I think the most I've ever had in one week is 12 (from different people) which was last year. I do know women get a lot of rubbish sent to them on these things - inappropriate pictures and creepy messages... no wonder they get fed up and don't reply!

When I first started on OKC I used to get a lot of invites to join threesomes for some reason (not my thing at all!) I don't seem to get those anymore so guess I'm no longer appealing to that crowd! :rotfl:

Smartsaver7

Thankfully never had any weird messages or invites asking me to join such things, a few crazies, lots of dubious foreign women oh and one transgender

jamiehelsinki

I can't quote on my phone but yes I need to find the girl attractive to begin with.

My profile is honest with genuine pictures taken recently.

It's often expected of the guy to pay which is frustrating when the person who turns up is just not for you or vice versa and is nothing like their profile suggests.

There have been 2 girls who I liked but one was a nurse who worked awkward hours and meeting proved difficult. The 2nd was clearly not ready to move on but really nice and ticked a lot of boxes from my point of view.

Smartsaver7

Go to bottom of page and select desk top view then can quote.

I always shared rounds and if lunch went dutch. I am sure there are a few who just go on dates for a free evening out

A friend once said, and I will try not to be crude , if you look at the person and don't think you could be intimate with them , unlikely to be for you

prosaver

Jamiehelsinki wrote: »

I can't quote on my phone but yes I need to find the girl attractive to begin with.

My profile is honest with genuine pictures taken recently.

It's often expected of the guy to pay which is frustrating when the person who turns up is just not for you or vice versa and is nothing like their profile suggests.

There have been 2 girls who I liked but one was a nurse who worked awkward hours and meeting proved difficult. The 2nd was clearly not ready to move on but really nice and ticked a lot of boxes from my point of view.

Was she from glasgow ? i think she was married if its the same one.
Nice tho:)