Going solo

Soundgirlrocks

tea_lover wrote: »

There's a big difference between IUI as a response to fertility difficulties, and IUI where the only problem is a lack of sperm (to put it bluntly ) Completely agree that IUI where there are already known problems can be a waste of time (along with time-wasting clomid).

Thank you yes I'm struggling to find out the success rates for single women with no known problems.

FBaby

Success rate will very much depend on your fertility. Age is a significant indication, but not the only one. Follicle count, FSH and AMH level. You then have factors such as smoking, BMI that will impact.

IUI is cheaper as an individual treatment but your chances of pregnancy through one cycle is lower than IVF. If you look at Manchester Fertility clinic as an example, one cycle of IUI with donor and drugs will cost £2K (+ consultation and investigations), it will cost about double for IVF, so not straight forward which one would be best to opt for. Either way, it certainly is an expensive journey.

FBaby

Thank you yes I'm struggling to find out the success rates for single women with no known problems.

https://www.manchesterfertility.com/donor-bank/looking-for-donor-sperm/

This states that about 1/3rd of women get pregnant with donor sperm. Although it doesn't separate the rate between 'problems' and 'no problems' women, I would expect that most going the sperm route will be either single or the fertility issue is with the male, so most likely not experiencing fertility problems themselves.

Newlyboughthouse

Why do you feel you have to have a child? Why not adoption?

Person_one

Newlyboughthouse wrote: »

Why do you feel you have to have a child? Why not adoption?

Would you ever ask that of somebody planning a child with a partner? The reasons will be essentially the same after all...

Newlyboughthouse

Person_one wrote: »

Would you ever ask that of somebody planning a child with a partner? The reasons will be essentially the same after all...

Yup! Don't know why people feel the need to bring yet more humans into this world. Just wondered whether she feels the need to have them because society says she should or...

tea_lover

newlyboughthouse wrote: »

why do you feel you have to have a child? Why not adoption?

this is beyond rude. Just dont.

Redacted

I essentially agree with Person_One at post 19. But as we're laying judgement out in this thread, here's mine:

I fail to see how the parent's intent or lack there of actually has any impact on the situation that follows. In both cases, the child is without a Dad and his family. Do people really think if the Mum hadn't intended it, that will make a child's potential reaction any different? I also don't think in one night stand scenarios a Mum is going to be explaining in detail to their young child what they did or didn't intend at the point of conception, so exactly how is this 4/6/11/etc, year old going to know?

I also think it's particularly naive to think children from split families are always given the choice about contact with the non-primary carer. Plenty of children are blocked from having contact with one of their parents for no other reason than the primary career wanted them out of their life.

I think the fact single people have this choice available speaks volumes. If we (country/government/society) felt it was unacceptable for someone to intend to be a single parent, the sperm donation option would not be available to single applicants.

On the money side op, given you're working theory is you'd have no income initially, you would be entitled to child benefit of £1076.40 and child tax credit of approx £3330 per year, based on current rates.

Soundgirlrocks

Newlyboughthouse wrote: »

Why do you feel you have to have a child? Why not adoption?

If you read the whole thread (or even just my replies) you will see I've already explained why I don't think I could cope with adoption, I don't feel I need to go over it again.

I don't feel I have to have a child, I want to have a child. I want to love and nurture a child, I want to help them grow and develop into the best they can be. I want a home with the giggles and mischief of a 4 year old up to no good, I want the chaos and mess and totally disruption they bring. I want a stropy teen who thinks they are the centre of the universe. I want to love someone above and beyond myself and to know when I leave this world there is hopefully the very best part of me still left behind. Raising children is part of the human experience and I whilst I understand not everyone wants that I do.

kirtsypoos

Soundgirlrocks wrote: »

If you read the whole thread (or even just my replies) you will see I've already explained why I don't think I could cope with adoption, I don't feel I need to go over it again.

I don't feel I have to have a child, I want to have a child. I want to love and nurture a child, I want to help them grow and develop into the best they can be. I want a home with the giggles and mischief of a 4 year old up to no good, I want the chaos and mess and totally disruption they bring. I want a stropy teen who thinks they are the centre of the universe. I want to love someone above and beyond myself and to know when I leave this world there is hopefully the very best part of me still left behind. Raising children is part of the human experience and I whilst I understand not everyone wants that I do.

Amazing reply, not that you need to justify this to anyone!!