Is it acceptable not to wear a wedding ring?

seven-day-weekend

LilElvis wrote: »

My Dad has never worn one in over 50 years of marriage. Mum has only had hers off for a couple of weeks - so the ring could be resized as it was cutting off circulation to her finger. I've worn mine every day for 10 years, though I don't wear it at night or when I'm cooking/cleaning/doing anything dirty. My sister hasn't removed hers for a second in the 10 years of her marriage. I was surprised when my husband chose to wear a ring as he won't even wear a watch and his has stayed on 24/7. It's whatever feels right for the individual, physically and emotionally.

I haven't removed mine in 45 years.

My husband wore his for about fifteen years, then lost it in the Afon Glaslyn. We didn't replace it until a few years a go, he now has a little silver ring that he loves and always wears.

However, I think if the couple agree together, whatever they decide is fine.

LilElvis

seven-day-weekend wrote: »

I haven't removed mine in 45 years.

My husband wore his for about fifteen years, then lost it in the Afon Glaslyn. We didn't replace it until a few years a go, he now has a little silver ring that he loves and always wears.

However, I think if the couple agree together, whatever they decide is fine.

My Mum wore hers all the time for over 50 years - refusing requests to remove it during operations as, by then, it was physically impossible to get it off. She only relented a couple of years ago as she needed an operation on her left hand. She went to a jeweller who cut it off, resized it so that she could put it back on a few weeks later after the swelling had subsided. She was furious when she was given her mother's ring after her death as she believes it should have been buried with her. I think she would try to haunt me if we removed hers after she has gone!

My sister's wedding ring was our paternal grandmother's - she gave it to my sister when she became engaged, but sadly passed, age 99, before the wedding.

theoretica

I know a number of women who more often wear their wedding ring on a chain round their neck than on a finger.

DigForVictory

theoretica wrote: »

I know a number of women who more often wear their wedding ring on a chain round their neck than on a finger.

I was one of those women - my midwife told me to wear it on a chain or risk it being cropped off in some pregnancy related medical emergency.
I was so stressed by having a bump & a bare hand (hormones!) m'husband bought me a near identical ring from Argos, bigger but lower quality gold - my 'Maternity' ring. Still got that, with son's initials & date of birth engraved within. (And another two for the other two babies! Not terribly MS but stopped me sobbing in the streets after a dubious look.)

Lily-Rose_3

DigForVictory wrote: »

I was one of those women - my midwife told me to wear it on a chain or risk it being cropped off in some pregnancy related medical emergency.
I was so stressed by having a bump & a bare hand (hormones!) m'husband bought me a near identical ring from Argos, bigger but lower quality gold - my 'Maternity' ring. Still got that, with son's initials & date of birth engraved within. (And another two for the other two babies! Not terribly MS but stopped me sobbing in the streets after a dubious look.)

That's so sweet..... A 'Maternity ring...'

missbiggles1

Lily-Rose wrote: »

That's so sweet..... A 'Maternity ring...'

My dad bought my mum an eternity ring for their 25th anniversary - he always got it wrong and called it a maternity ring!

Lily-Rose_3

missbiggles1 wrote: »

My dad bought my mum an eternity ring for their 25th anniversary - he always got it wrong and called it a maternity ring!

:rotfl::rotfl: Cute. That's the sort of thing my dad would say!

DigForVictory

We really didn't have Eternity money. Hence simple Argos wedding bands & if our relatives didn't hear quite right, they certainly heard the love. Much recommended when maternity hormones start to rollercoaster!

Jojo_the_Tightfisted

I'd feel extremely hurt if I were to be looking forward to getting married, only to be told that he didn't want anybody to know unless he told them.

I know that's not the real reason for most men, but that's what it would feel like to me; as though he wanted to keep his options open, whereas I'd be obviously married from both wearing a ring and from changing my name.


I know that it doesn't stop somebody from cheating, but it feels 'more honest' to me.


(yes, I know it's not logical, but emotions aren't logical things).

Georgiegirl256

Jojo_the_Tightfisted wrote: »

I'd feel extremely hurt if I were to be looking forward to getting married, only to be told that he didn't want anybody to know unless he told them.

I know that's not the real reason for most men, but that's what it would feel like to me; as though he wanted to keep his options open, whereas I'd be obviously married from both wearing a ring and from changing my name.


I know that it doesn't stop somebody from cheating, but it feels 'more honest' to me.


(yes, I know it's not logical, but emotions aren't logical things).

You said it!

From my personal point of view of not wearing a ring, it isn't because I don't want anyone to know that I'm married, and it's most definitely not because I want to keep my options open.

I know it might sound harsh, but even if my DH had been upset and hurt at me not wearing one, then it still wouldn't have change my mind. I don't like jewellery, and would not wear one just because he wanted me too. It does not make me any more married.

I don't need to be "owned" by a ring. Do you know how easy those things remove? When me and my friend were in London, we got chatted up by a do called single man....but a quick glance at his wedding finger revealed a tan mark where his ring had been!