Pre-30 panic

Guest101

Detroit wrote: »

Studies show that young parents have healthier pregnancies and children because they are at the peak of their fertility.

Studies show that older parents have healthier pregnancies and children because they are more financially stable and able to afford better diet.

Studies show th a younger parents have better relationships with their children as they are closer in age and better able to relate to them.

Studies show that older parents have better relationships with their children because they tend to be more patient and at a more stable point in their life to give attention and resources to the child.

Studies show that only children are more likely to be lonely and grow up self centred and socially awkward.

Studies show that only children benefit from the company of adults and grow up socially confident.

Studies show that studies generally involve gathering evidence to support a preconceived theory and that if you look hard enough, studies can be found to support your viewpoint of choice.

Absolutely, but it's perfectly valid to have a viewpoint which agrees with those studies

sweetilemon

Are you sure the low sex drive on his part and the fact you don't want children just now and he does are mutually exclusive? I'm not saying it's a good idea to agree to kids if your not ready but I do think sex with the thought that we could make a baby was a lot more inviting than preventing...but that's because I wanted/want children.

I know the 30 fear! I'm 30 next year too and was delighted to think I would have a 1 1/2 yr old running around on my birthday. Unfortunately that's not going to be the case as she passed away at 1 month. I'd love to start trying again but my husband wants to wait. We are married and I definitely want to be with him so it's a bit different but I understand the pre-30 panic and you both not agreeing on when to start a family. Biology says we can't wait forever but you need to be ready emotionally too. I get from your post you are questioning if staying with this man is the best thing for you or whether you have time to start again. Only you can decide that.

Beautiful-Moose

Well I spoke with the BF a little last night and asked him if everything was OK, if I came across to him as a bit of a sex pest or I was putting too much pressure on him to do stuff. He reassured me that it was all stress related recently, he knows I am not a sex pest and realises it has been a good while since we last did it but he honestly hasn't felt in the mood what with the health scare he had recently and now with his family member in the hospital and us having to go up there pretty much every evening he was drained. He said he knew I was worried and that I was starting to think he might have gone off me or the idea of sex because I was apparently coming across to him as being distant and quiet with him. He said that he still does love me and fancy me very much and that hopefully once his family member is out of the hospital and we have a night totally to ourselves we can make the most of it. That little chat has eased my mind a lot in that I know his desire is still in there. I just need to make sure we make the most of the holiday we have coming up

I know the 30 fear! I'm 30 next year too and was delighted to think I would have a 1 1/2 yr old running around on my birthday. Unfortunately that's not going to be the case as she passed away at 1 month. I'd love to start trying again but my husband wants to wait. We are married and I definitely want to be with him so it's a bit different but I understand the pre-30 panic and you both not agreeing on when to start a family. Biology says we can't wait forever but you need to be ready emotionally too. I get from your post you are questioning if staying with this man is the best thing for you or whether you have time to start again. Only you can decide that.

I am so sorry to hear of your loss sweetilemon I can't imagine what that must be like. But I agree that you need to be emotionally ready to bring a life in to the world. I think I am getting there but not quite there at this moment in time. I know that I want to stay with my man. I am very much a fix it sort of person. I want to fix these problems not run away from them. I would only walk if I had tried to fix them so many time that our relationship really was broken. Right now it is not broken, it is just in a little bit of a rut as I am sure all relationships fall in to at some point. I just needed to know my man was still in this relationship as much as I am and the lack of sex was my first panic that what if he isn't? But it seems after our little chat last night we could be heading in the right direction on that front.