Is it my fault? What would you do?

.j.e.j

Very odd indeed.

If someone was assaulting and verbally abusing my grown up child while I was in the next room and able to hear what was going on, I'd be in there like a shot. I certainly wouldn't pretend nothing was happening.

Lotstogain

Just to add to what many others have said. You are not in the wrong. He very much is. It's important that you get help from Women's Aid or any other place you can. Please don't let him continue to treat you and your family like this.

DigForVictory

Littlepea1,
please do two things.
See your GP and tell them about the throat grabbing. Once on medical record, with any photos of residual bruising, he can twist the "how it came about" several ways but he can't deny it ever happened.

However, first, clear your browser history (google how to if you need to) & Make A Habit Of It.

Yes, of course talk to your family (indeed, grab the essentials & leave with them?), and to the local coppers (who may well have a domestic violence team, better able to protect you & any evidence than we can) and to women's aid, but your husband may well be checking up on your internet activity. Who do you think will be target number one once he's read this thread?

Hide your searches for support until you're ready to leap.
Hide any savings you manage to accrue.
Hoping you stay safe til you are ready & able to get out.