How much rent should my parents charge me?

lady1964

Thunderbird4 wrote: »

Sounds like you've raised a daughter to be proud of. Well done.

Thank you, we're very proud of the 3 D's we have. I'll admit she did surprise me because I thought she would, given the chance, be happy to not pay any rent but she clearly appreciates what she has and how much we support her with everything she does, as we do with each of our DD's. We are very fortunate to be comfortable financially but that said, we appreciate that our DD's are of the first generation to be less well off than their parents so we do what we can do to help them.

lady1964

BobQ wrote: »

I imagine the OP has long since departed this thread. I found the thread rather amusing. Most parents sympathise with the difficulties their children have when staring out in life and even when they have a short lived problem later in life. But the OP really takes the biscuit. When you are entering retirement you expect to have a less complicated life, not to do your 35 year old child's washing and have them sponge off you while they save enough money to sod off abroad.

The OP should be self supporting. £50 is generous in my view for a 35yo, but it really is up to them.


Anxiety? It seems strange to me that someone who has Anxiety is planning to travel to live in a country where stress is a way of life.

Just to touch on the subject of moving overseas, I moved to Dubai when I was 24 with a baby who was not quite a year old. I found it incredibly difficult & I don't suffer from any anxiety problems. So, not quite sure how the OP will manage. I underestimated how difficult it would be, I did eventually enjoy my time there & it helped that I found a good network of friends. I hope,the OP can do the same should she ever make it over to the US.

just_trying

Thunderbird4 wrote: »

If you're taking a third of your kids wages it does appear that you're not charging them board (e.g a cost based on what it costs you to home them). Instead it appears you are charging them some sort of living tax for being in your house.

Okay, now thinking about your post, living tax means making money. Far from it, I live somewhere it's expensive to live, where they wanted to move before earning. No we don't own our own house, it costs what it does, they have a roof over there heads and all comforts they want. They're free money is there's. My oh works damn hard for what he earns. You're comments are derogatory. Not everyone is a position to own there own home.

So what it appears to you is wrong, is not simples. Just because you take nothing from yes a adult means nothing, my adults are younger and get they expect to pay something. As my lot would say you're rude.

pollypenny

This thread is still making me laugh. We travel to the USA to help look after grandsons when DIL has to travel. It costs us around £800 each to fly plus car hire. We generally shop, as well as cook the dinner, without expecting to be reimbursed.

Still we can relax in their 5 bed roomed house and swim in their pool. DS managed it, in spite of paying his profiteering parents £50pw from his starting salary of £32k.

Detroit

Thunderbird4 wrote: »

I like phrases like "vast majority of cases". What evidence have you got to back this up?

I meet this issue frequently in the course of my work, so mostly anecdotal I'm afraid, and therefore easy for you to dismiss.

Do you have any evidence that parents who ask their children to contribute are making a profit, given this is the key thrust of your argument?

Moreover, do you have evidence that this is their intent when accepting the contribution from their child, given your use of the phrase 'Like to make a profit'?

MandM90

Where is the fianc! in all this? If you're going to be sharing your life, and are planning on marrying, with you coming over to the US with no job, surely he has a decent paying full time job? Can he not help pay to get you over, or contribute towards your long suffering parents?

I paid £50 a week to my mum when I was saving for a deposit, and I thought it was incredibly kind of her. Towards the end I started cleaning on a Saturday morning for her, in exchange for even more off that. Can you not get an evening job/take in ironing/do some babysitting/gardening/cleaning for some extra cash? You'll want them on side if it all goes t*ts up and you need help getting back home

Pollycat

MandM90 wrote: »

Where is the fianc! in all this? If you're going to be sharing your life, and are planning on marrying, with you coming over to the US with no job, surely he has a decent paying full time job? Can he not help pay to get you over, or contribute towards your long suffering parents?

I paid £50 a week to my mum when I was saving for a deposit, and I thought it was incredibly kind of her. Towards the end I started cleaning on a Saturday morning for her, in exchange for even more off that. Can you not get an evening job/take in ironing/do some babysitting/gardening/cleaning for some extra cash? You'll want them on side if it all goes t*ts up and you need help getting back home

I've got a different question.

Where is the OP in all this?

AylesburyDuck

LKRDN_Morgan wrote: »

I'd give up if I were you. It's clear there's some 'issues' going on here
Posting your living situation in detail then telling someone to mind their own business when they ask a further question?
Having your previous posts trawled?
Bizarre

Maybe when your post count is a little higher you won't be so berated for disagreeing with the majority

I havnt got a high post count, nobody berated me (despite my similar opinions), so i think your reaching.:o
You and Thunderbird4 are really coming across as aggresivly defensive now.
Some people dont agree with you, hell the longer you BOTH rant on for and the more defensive you get even i am not agreeing with you, your (both sides) just coming across as a foot stomping teenagers.:eek:
Past doing what i believe is right for my family i care little if anyone chooses to go a different route.
If it works for them, great, my method works for me, also great.
If it aint broke dont try and fix it.

Pollycat

AylesburyDuck wrote: »

I havnt got a high post count, nobody berated me (despite my similar opinions), so i think your reaching.:o
You and Thunderbird4 are really coming across as aggresivly defensive now.
Some people dont agree with you, hell the longer you BOTH rant on for and the more defensive you get even i am not agreeing with you, your (both sides) just coming across as a foot stomping teenagers.:eek:
Past doing what i believe is right for my family i care little if anyone chooses to go a different route.
If it works for them, great, my method works for me, also great.
If it aint broke dont try and fix it.

But from the OP's and her Mum's perspective it is broke because the Mum feels that £50 per week is fair and the OP doesn't.

AylesburyDuck

Pollycat wrote: »

But from the OP's and her Mum's perspective it is broke because the Mum feels that £50 per week is fair and the OP doesn't.

And thats all fine and dandy, daughter asked for opinions and in 16 pages i think she's got plenty, but at the end of the day Mums house, Mums rules is the trump card over all of us i think. What we all say is irrelevant bar opinion.
I was refering to the in-house fighting, maybe i shouldnt have assumed i had made that clear.:o
In which case. Appologies.:undecided