How much rent should my parents charge me?

missbiggles1

Torry_Quine wrote: »

Silvercar

While I see the sentiment I don't agree with all of it. I would never go in without knocking, raid the cupboards for food or look at their mail. :eek:

I also wonder whether it works the other way round.

Is it acceptable to walk into your adult child's house without knocking, raid the cupboards and help yourself to the post.

If not, why not?

Pollycat

Torry_Quine wrote: »

Silvercar

While I see the sentiment I don't agree with all of it. I would never go in without knocking, raid the cupboards for food or look at their mail. :eek:

Me neither.

I always knock on my Mum's door - and my sister's too.

I wouldn't dream of just walking in.

And I certainly wouldn't want 'the weight of adulthood' to leave me when I'm visiting my Mum.

I'm an adult (and have been for over 40 years) - why would I want to feel like a child again?

missbiggles1

Pollycat wrote: »

Me neither.

I always knock on my Mum's door - and my sister's too.

I wouldn't dream of just walking in.

And I certainly wouldn't want 'the weight of adulthood' to leave me when I'm visiting my Mum.

I'm an adult (and have been for over 40 years) - why would I want to feel like a child again?

Quite. Eternal infancy, how desirable is that?

fairy_lights

silvercar wrote: »

I know that myself and my siblings are always welcome at our parents house, but if we walked in, rifled through the mail and helped ourselves to food out of the fridge we'd be seriously overstepping some boundaries.

foxtrotoscar_2

xXMessedUpXx wrote: »

Personally if i;d eever moved hom after uni id have been expected to contribute, and i'd have had no problem with that (my issue was more the fact i;d have to live under my parents rules and probably still be treated ike a child hence why i never moved back ). My sister did get a year baord free when she moved back after uni, she used that year to save up to go travelling for 9 months. When she returned my parents were preparing to ask her for board but not long after she decided to move to London anyway.

My bf on the other hand currently does not pay board, he;s lived back at his parents since splitting with his ex about 2 years ago. His mum point blank refuses to charge him board. Before we met he spent a lot of time on the dole so thats partly why she never made him pay it. Sonce we;ve been together hes mostly been in work (bar a few months between temp jobs). Hes curreently managed to save a grand so far, and he does eventually want us to gte our own place (i have my own debts to pay off first) so any money he;s saving is going towards that I think thats why his mum doesn't mind, because she knows he will at some point move out. His dad on the other hand thinks he should pay board...but his mum won;t back down. I dont think its made him terrible with money, and he;s certainly not a bad person at all, its just the way it is.

He's not paying board and has only managed to save 1k in two years? Less than £10/week?

JReacher1

pollypenny wrote: »

It's more about your stage in life. We did not have a single £1 in spare cash until 1996 when DS, our younger child graduated.


We're fine now, but I was very concerned about how retirement finances would work out. I would certainly expect an adult of working age to contribute if living with retired parents.

£50 is not a great deal. Savings are secondary to paying one's way in life.

I don't really think you've got the right to expect anything from any parental child relationship that is nothing to do with yourself.

AylesburyDuck

silvercar wrote: »

I myself mainly agree :T , although all my children would be told where the eyebleach was kept in case of emergency.
They take their chances!

mai_taylor

fairy_lights wrote: »

I know that myself and my siblings are always welcome at our parents house, but if we walked in, rifled through the mail and helped ourselves to food out of the fridge we'd be seriously overstepping some boundaries.

My husbands mum and my parents both tell us off if we knock. We just walk in and are welcome to raid the fridge. I wouldn't go through their post but they are laid back and happy for us to treat their houses like are home.

Tammykitty

silvercar wrote: »

This is what my parent's house is like.


In their eyes it will always be my home - I do admit to raiding the fridge sometimes (By that I mean - have a cup of tea and a sandwich)


And yes my parents, are allowed to walk into my house without knocking too, and some of my friends etc, simply knock and then walk in.


(the door will be locked if we don't want people simply walking in!)

System

foxtrotoscar wrote: »

He's not paying board and has only managed to save 1k in two years? Less than £10/week?

Well he did save more than that but used it to pay off his 2k overdraft. Also used some to live on during the 5 ((x2) months inbetween temp work. If all goes to plan he should get made perm this year or next and when he does he'll be earning a lot more money.

He's doing better than i am, i haven;t managed topay any of my overdraft off yet. But hopefuully over the next 2 years if i save £30 a week i'll have it paid off and a little saved too (though i can only work part time, and im paying rent so i struggle to save, also have bipolar so budgeting/impulse control is a huge issue)