Victim blaming mentality

FBaby

The issue is often in the interpretation.. If you have thick skin, you are not going to be affected by words that someone overly sensitive will take great offense to. Facts are fact, but interpretation of facts are subjective.

Guest101

FBaby wrote: »

I had a go at Guest quite a few times but he can take it (and reciprocally!)

Indeed, when we disagree we debate the issue, sometimes quite rigorously, and sometimes we agree


I don't think, and I certainly hope there's not any bad feelings long term

Peter333

I don't take things to heart on message boards (these are people I don't even know, why would I?!) And tbh I find very few people very nasty; I have found some people quite straightforward and a bit curt but not nasty.

There are a few people who are though. They aren't vile or massively insulting; moreso condescending and sarcastic and ridiculing.

Robisere

When I joined this forum, it was because I believed that people posted looking for help or advice with a problem they had encountered.

Help and advice. Right. Is that not what should happen, that their questions (often more like desperate pleas) should be dealt with, using one's intelligence and experience, to help?

I am not about to sling mud at anyone, I just think that Pickledonion has the right of it. There is far too much cynicism here at times.

missbiggles1

fierystormcloud wrote: »

No, being mean and brutal is NOT a positive trait.

It's not.

Fact.

You can tell someone the truth without being mean and nasty and spiteful.

And YOU can stop putting words into my mouth too!

I never said lie to people!

I think sugar coating is a nasty trait - when it's laced with words like "hon" and "babes" it becomes a hanging offence.:D

Tiddlywinks

pendragon_arther wrote: »

Actually the following is a fact:
.....................

You really do need to look up the definition of 'fact'.

Everything you quoted was based on perception, incidental opinion and random sampling... it could so easily have had a different set of outcomes if the 'research' had been conducted in a different way or with different demographics.

Just because something is quoted on the internet does not make it 'fact' - it just makes it narrative.

Back to the main issue - there is nothing wrong with just being blunt - if you stick to the facts and don't add opinion then how can that possibly be wrong?

Perhaps because the OP doesn't want the facts and just wants an opinion?

Telling someone living with domestic violence to move out or s/he will continue to be a victim is relevant and to the point. Just as you'd probably tell someone to stop hitting their head against a brick wall because it will continue to hurt.

Telling someone with massive debt to stop spending on unnecessary items - and pointing out that Sky TV *is* in that category is just pointing out the harsh reality of budgeting.

Etc, etc, etc.

suki1964

I lie at lease once a day

Really depends on who I meet

How you doing?

I always say grand no matter what. I think that's the only lie I do

Pollycat

Peter333 wrote: »

A lot of people agree with the OP too; over 30 people have thanked the post. That proves she is not the only one who thinks what she thinks about the behaviour of some posters on this board..

I think if you believe that the number of 'thanks' a poster gets is an accurate representation of the 'truth', you are deluded.

Tiddlywinks

Peter333 wrote: »

A lot of people agree with the OP too; over 30 people have thanked the post. That proves she is not the only one who thinks what she thinks about the behaviour of some posters on this board.

But... there have been well over 3,000 views of the thread.

A lot of people have read and moved along without thanking the post. Unfortunately, there's no way of capturing the 'I don't agree' votes as there isn't a button for that.

Peter333

Tiddlywinks wrote: »

But... there have been well over 3,000 views of the thread.

A lot of people have read and moved along without thanking the post. Unfortunately, there's no way of capturing the 'I don't agree' votes as there isn't a button for that.

I do have to agree with this actually. ^^^

There should really be a 'I don't agree with this' button.

Or it should be like it is on certain comments boards of various online mags and newspapers, where you can click a green tick or a red cross. So along with all the thanks that people get for a post, people will also get people saying 'NO, I don't agree!'

This thread aside, this would stop a lot of ganging up and cliques all supporting their forum buddies.