large booking at restaurant- how to split the bill?

Andypandyboy

PasturesNew wrote: »

That can be organised, then the person you spoke to gets drunk and is off singing karaoke or puking outside when somebody else randomly picks up the bill and tells you you're splitting it. Or maybe they're outside chatting/smoking and can talk the hind legs off a donkey and won't reappear for aaages.

You can't trust arrangements to stay as arranged.

Somebody paying their way doesn't upset the cart as much as splitting a bill does.

Why should anybody mind that I know I had an "£9 meal, £3 on drinks so here's £15"? It doesn't make their bills larger than if I'd not been there.

For someone who eats out once or twice a year you surely have run the gamut of those who you believe are out to "stiff" you.

I think you just don't like people very much or the social graces which is fine, but often that is a self fulfilling phrophecy.:D

seven-day-weekend

Georgiegirl256 wrote: »

As far as I can gather, she's implying that people are greedy if they eat and drink a lot and then expect others to pay for their indulgence.
Which, I actually agree with. People can eat and drink all they want, I couldn't care less, just don't expect me to pay for it.

She does just pay her own bill and leaves it at that....what are people not understanding here?

What I think is miserable is that people just won't live and let live and accept that some people are happier with just paying for their own meal and drink. Everybody should be allowed to have a night out without being judged as spoiling someone's night. There's far more important things to worry about IMO.

I agree and , I have said she should pay for her own. What I meant I would find miserable is a) constantly worrying that b)everyone was going to deliberately over-indulge and c) expect me to subsidise it.

That surely can't be a pleasurable experience by anyone's standards.

duchy

Kim_kim wrote: »

The tip is for the service not the food

To you a "bad meal" is solely about the food ?

Feral_Moon

PasturesNew wrote: »

That's probably the main reason I'd not go. Apart from the horrendous price and that I don't like/drink wine ..... I like to choose/know what I'm getting. Not fanny about with tastings of stuff I've never heard of and would never have chosen.

Bring on a pie, or a chilli, maybe a curry with some poppadums and a naan.

I also don't like the idea of people "touching my food" - I've seen them on the telly with posh nosh - it's all ponced about with by hand. I like to know my chips were shovelled onto the plate, not stacked by hand by some grubby oik in the kitchen that drew the short straw and got to do the chips today.

LOL :rotfl:

I must admit, it's not something I'd do on a regular basis and almost always involves a special occasion of some sort. It also helps that I'm very adventurous in my food tastes and will always try something once. There's very little I don't like or couldn't eat.

missbiggles1

PasturesNew wrote: »

Going out for a curry or a carvery has pretty much been my only/main experience of invites anywhere to be honest.

People I've known haven't done anything else.

I enjoy eating, that's why I go out to eat when asked. I hate dining alone, so when invited out for food, I go.

This all seems to pretty much well come back to the old "If you can't afford to pay for somebody else to eat, then stop going out" ... it should be those whose tab is being picked up that should stop going out!

You're shooting the messenger.

I'm not shooting anybody, least of all you. I'm just suggesting that there might be more enjoyable (and affordable) ways in which you can go out and enjoy yourself that don't involve eating and drinking with strangers, many of whom you don't even like.

Andypandyboy

Surely you can see that splitting a bill is not automatically wrong. any more than paying your own bill is?

It is situation, demographic and custom and practice dependent.

You seem to be saying that those who just split a bill are doing so from some ulterior motive. That is simply not true.

No point labouring the point further though.

Andypandyboy

PasturesNew wrote: »

I used to eat out more often, say 3-4x a year.... so all in all maybe 100x in my life. You appear to be blaming me when I wasn't the one who was doing it. It was being done, that's a fact. So why blame the one who spotted it?

I wasn't being tight ... and refusing .... I was skint in the presence of those with a lot more. All I ask people to do is to pay their own way if they're going out, or stay at home.

Simples.

It's kind of the twisted argument used above - that if you can't afford it you shouldn't go out. This 'argument', surely, should be aimed at those who AREN'T paying!

Those that "pay for what they had" invariably overpay, including a tip. None leave the others short of what they'd have had to pay if that person hadn't attended. Those that "pay for what they had" don't do it "to the penny" - they're happy to round up each item and round up their total and include a tip. This fallacy that they do it to the penny is a myth perpetuated by those who aren't affording the company the same decent behaviour.

In the specific example of 14 people provided, the poster's personal bill came to £33 - and they coughed up £45. The group were asked for a £2 tip - out of that £12 extra they'd paid their 3x£2 tip and £6 on top.



So the group were already "£6 ahead"!

I read it as £33 mains plus £6 for a starter = £39, plus £6 for the tip = £45

Paid exactly what they ate.

missbiggles1

PasturesNew wrote: »

Well, the alternative is to do something I might not like with another group of random strangers.

At least if I go out for food I'll be fed!

Sometimes it's best to just learn to enjoy your own company.:)

Feral_Moon

onlyroz wrote: »

I can understand them saying "2 people minimum" or similar, but to force everyone in a large party to have it seems like poor business practice. Surely it's not too complicated for them to coordinate different preferences?

Perhaps you don't understand the concept of tasting menus. They're often found in Michelin Star pubs and cooked by highly trained and renowned chefs. The menus are set and charged per person.

My most recent experience was at the Midsummer House restaurant in Cambridge (http://www.midsummerhouse.co.uk/menus) and we chose the 7 course menu. Not cheap but worth every single penny. Even the Prince William and Princess Kate have eaten here on more than one occasion.

moneyistooshorttomention

PasturesNew wrote: »

The thing is, those who pay for themselves get along fine, until suddenly splitting the bill appears to trump that. Others will want to pay for themselves but sit, quiet, petrified to speak out, reaching silently for their purse, smiling/joking and pretending it's fine for them too .... they daren't speak out. I do.

It's par for the course I find Pastures - ie that there are a lot of people that will (in their own mind) agree with what you (or I) say in some context or other (not just the "out for a communal meal" context). But - they are too scared to speak out. Other times - they dont want to actually think about it in the first case - in case they decide Mr Steak and Lobster (in any context) is wrong and then have to admit to themselves that they are too much of a wimp to say anything.

That's life I guess:cool: - but it is wrong of those people on the thread who dont see things this way to go in for delivering personal criticism of you. You see things this way - and so do I and we arent wrong and we are entitled to our viewpoint - without other people trying to cast aspersions personally. That is naughty

I've just come to the conclusion that those who wish to carry on dividing the bill evenly are simply not going to accept this is unfair - no matter how clearly it's explained to them that it is. They don't wish to see it - so they won't see it....

Guess that's where the phrase comes from of "You can lead a horse to water but you can't make it drink". It must have been invented by someone who got fed-up with trying to find a logical way to explain something that would actually get through...