Why are some people really tight with their money?

jjj1980

Oh my gosh, me and my friends must come across as horrid to others then!


We've all been through times of genuine financial hardship but are more comfortable now - some more so than others. We regularly meet with our children for meals, bowling etc. At least one of us has vouchers or offer emails of some description to use. This sometimes means one person doesn't lay out any cash but no-one ends up paying more than their own share of the bill. And it doesn't bother any of us at all!


At times of hardship, if one of us that was more comfortable had the voucher, it was immediately given to the one who was struggling as nobody wanted anyone to be left out. Or we had an agreement that if we all went out, if one agreed to drive, their drinks and parking costs were covered by the rest of the group.


We've even done the BOGOF deals and one person has paid the whole "Buy One" part allowing the other the "free" one.


I do know we are very lucky though as we are a really close group and know that at any time, we could call on each other no questions asked.

Person_one

Feral_Moon wrote: »

What would you do if a friend invited you out for dinner and offered to pay for the food if you covered the cost of drinks/gratuity (assuming it was a relatively even split of course) and then when the bill arrives they produce vouchers to cover their part instead of cash?

Feral_Moon wrote: »

Thanks for your response. It wouldn't bother me either but I was recently in this very situation whereby I was the one using vouchers. The person I was lunching with was rather annoyed that I'd effectively be receiving a "free lunch" whereas they were "paying" for theirs with cash and actually expected me to split the rest of the bill :eek:

Feral_Moon wrote: »

I don't understand why. And yes, I'd agreed it beforehand to hopefully avoid this exact situation when it came time to pay especially as they ended up paying far less than they would had I never used vouchers anyway!

Sorry to be picky, but the situation you initially described, where vouchers were produced when the bill arrived, is a bit different to the situation now being described, where it was all agreed beforehand.

PeacefulWaters

i_was_taught_2b_cautious wrote: »

.

There is no need to make other people feel bad, as I know people have been in difficult situations which make it impossible to think of going out, sharing a bill etc.

Your thread title made me feel bad.

duchy

i_was_taught_2b_cautious wrote: »

And I am not asking the questions because I think it's wrong being tight, I want to know why people do some of the things mentioned above.

Why would someone who is well off say they don't have money to other people or come across as if they do not have any money, but their life style says something else?

Maybe they simply don't want to spend time with you and it's an excuse ? I wouldn't waste my time or money going out to dinner just for the sake of it with acquaintances.

goodwithsaving

Why would someone who is well off say they don't have money to other people or come across as if they do not have any money, but their life style says something else.............

........because peoples perception of wealth differs. I have a lot left each month but will have 'no money' towards the end of the month because I've committed 'x' amount to savings. That to me is an expenditure. Often those who do enjoy nicer clothes, shoes etc. have gone without in other areas.

Anyway quite frankly, what other friends/acquaintances think about the way I manage my income is absolutely nothing to do with them. In my eyes many of them are wasteful, whilst to them I may be over careful. At the end of the day, it matters not one jot what we think of each other as long as we get along and support each other without judgement.

Feral_Moon

Spendless wrote: »

Well me too, but I wonder why that suggestion was made when planning a meal out, that one would pay for food and the other drinks if one was going to be a lot higher bill to one of them (taking away the means of paying the bill out of the equation for the minute).

Because ordinarily, at this particular restaurant a food bill for two is approx £40 (two courses each) and our drinks bill (my glass, her bottle, plus a couple of coffees) plus the usual £10 tip would cost around the same. Had no vouchers been involved then the total bill, inc tip would have been around £80 so £40 each. (Or rather, my bill would have been £30 and hers £50 had we just paid what we'd consumed so she got away light by paying only £25).

She was perfectly aware before we went out that I had no money to spare, hence suggesting I cover her food bill if she would pick up the tab for the rest, saving her around £20 off her bill. She seemed fine with the arrangement and even booked the table for us.

I really fail to understand what the issue is and why I'm getting slated by a handful of you when all I've been is generous! You all appear to reading far too much into the situation and creating scenarios to suit your argument. And here's me thinking this is a Money Saving Expert forum :rotfl:

Jagraf

Jagraf wrote: »

If I have vouchers I throw them in and then we split the difference.

If my friend suggested going to a restaurant and paying for foid with all the vouchers, and asked me to pay for drinks I would be miffed. Trying to get free drinks imo.

Alternatively I would pay for my meal in vouchers, and my drinks in cash. But hey, my friends can share my vouchers as you wouldn't really go there if you didn't have vouchers you would go for a pub dinner which is much cheaper usualky.

The way I see it is that one got a free night out, the other bought the drinks.

We use vouchers with my sis in law sometimes. That's 4 adults and 4 teens. We add up all the vouchers and then split the rest irrespective of who has more vouchers.

Feral_Moon

Person_one wrote: »

Sorry to be picky, but the situation you initially described, where vouchers were produced when the bill arrived, is a bit different to the situation now being described, where it was all agreed beforehand.

I had no idea I would be faced with such interrogation by asking such a simple question. I never even intended to mention my own situation when I put the question out there. It was an off-cuff comment to someone responding to my original question as an example. It's always the same few though, ripping into whatever people post looking for any discrepancy between posts. Quite sad really.

Feral_Moon

Homeownertobe wrote: »

You seem very defensive for your behaviour. You've lost a friend all for the sake of a few pounds. I'd say that was the very definition of 'tight'. And it's clear from the reaction on MSE (as MSE as it is) that many people can see your behaviour for what it was - even if you can't.

As for her 'excessively high drinks bill' - :rotfl:

No, I haven't lost a friend actually. You people just love to make things up as you go along :rotfl:

Goldiegirl

For me, skint is when a person has no money at all until they next get paid, and can't pay for basics like food.

If a person has money in savings, but they've spent all they actually want to spend for the month, then that is not skint.