Why are some people really tight with their money?

LameWolf

Mimi_Arc_en_ciel wrote: »

I don't look at the money I have left at the end of the month and think "great, I can spend it" - I look at it and think "great, I can save that"

I agree. Having in the past had to skip meals in order to make the money last til the next pay day, I still find it very hard to get my head round spending unnecessarily.

As it happens, we're going to have to be careful with our money for a bit, as my husband has just retired (I've been retired for 15 years myself) so I need to rethink the household budget.

Regarding group outings and paying one's fair share, if I couldn't afford my share, I'd politely refuse the invitation.

tattycath

LameWolf wrote: »

I agree. Having in the past had to skip meals in order to make the money last til the next pay day, I still find it very hard to get my head round spending unnecessarily.

As it happens, we're going to have to be careful with our money for a bit, as my husband has just retired (I've been retired for 15 years myself) so I need to rethink the household budget.

Regarding group outings and paying one's fair share, if I couldn't afford my share, I'd politely refuse the invitation.

I'm the same regarding group outings. Just to add, if I also have sufficient money, but have other things I need/want to prioritise on, I would politely decline on the grounds of affordability as money is needed else where.

Homeownertobe

Georgiegirl256 wrote: »

Lumbered? :rotfl: Sneakiness? :rotfl:

FM was up front, and besides, vouchers are as good a tender as any other form of payment (provided the establishment in question accepts them of course), and that's all it is, another form of payment.

Obviously it's different if you get a voucher say for 20% off off the internet or magazine for example, but vouchers such as clubcard vouchers or gift vouchers is totally different.

I really don't know why it's so hard for people to understand?

If she was up front, why on earth was her friend shocked by her behaviour?;)

Spendless

Georgiegirl256 wrote: »

Lumbered? :rotfl: Sneakiness? :rotfl:

FM was up front, and besides, vouchers are as good a tender as any other form of payment (provided the establishment in question accepts them of course), and that's all it is, another form of payment.

Obviously it's different if you get a voucher say for 20% off off the internet or magazine for example, but vouchers such as clubcard vouchers or gift vouchers is totally different.

I really don't know why it's so hard for people to understand?

Why is it? Clubcard vouchers come for free, by shopping at Tesco. A shop at Tesco costs the same regardless of if you use a clubcard or not. Presumably you are buying things you need at Tesco. A gift voucher on the other hand, someone has had to buy pay £10 out to get a £10 gift voucher. You can come into a grey area if the gift voucher has come as a freebie for paying for a service etc eg sign up to sky and get a free giftcard, but then the difference is the other party wouldn't be aware that the giftcard came to you as a bonus for spending money on something else, whereas with clubcard deals you are aware that it hasn't cost you anything more than you would have spent in Tesco to acquire it.

If the difference is that the clubcard could have been spent on other goods, then it's already been mentioned that being upfront about you wouldn't be spending physical cash whilst the other party would be, would have been preferable (living aside for the minute the discrepancy in what they drank).

Homeownertobe

Feral_Moon wrote: »

"Lumbered with a bill of £25" even when the cost of my glass of wine was only £5 compared to her £20 bottle of wine? I've heard it all now :rotfl:

Perhaps I should have just covered my own costs for food/drink rather than genererously offering to cover the cost of her meal, leaving her with £40+ bill plus £5 towards the tip. I'd still have only paid £10 in cash value for my half.

Oh, and not forgetting I also saved her a £20 taxi fare by offering to pick her up rather than meet at the restaurant. I guess I really don't need friends like her after all. And people are accusing me of being tight! Okayyyy.

Oh, and there was nothing sneaky or dishonest about it, not on my behalf anyway. I think she was the sneaky one assuming I'd also split her excessively high drinks bill as well as paying for the food!

You seem very defensive for your behaviour. You've lost a friend all for the sake of a few pounds. I'd say that was the very definition of 'tight'. And it's clear from the reaction on MSE (as MSE as it is) that many people can see your behaviour for what it was - even if you can't.

As for her 'excessively high drinks bill' - :rotfl:

Georgiegirl256

Spendless wrote: »

Why is it? Clubcard vouchers come for free, by shopping at Tesco. A shop at Tesco costs the same regardless of if you use a clubcard or not. Presumably you are buying things you need at Tesco.

If the difference is that the clubcard could have been spent on other goods, then it's already been mentioned that being upfront about you wouldn't be spending physical cash whilst the other party would be, would have been preferable (living aside for the minute the discrepancy in what they drank).

Doesn't matter. The fact still remains that FM paid for the meal, actually paid the majority of the cost of the night out tbh when she could have used those vouchers to treat themselves to something else. They could have used them to buy their groceries, a magazine subscription, a day trip or a holiday away.

They are a valid form of payment whereas the vouchers off the internet are usually for a percentage off or a deal.

The vouchers you get of the internet etc are available to anyone to print out. FM's clubcard vouchers (regardless of whether you would have spent the money in Tesco regardless) are hers, which she chose to spend on that meal.

Homeownertobe wrote: »

You seem very defensive for your behaviour. You've lost a friend all for the sake of a few pounds. I'd say that was the very definition of 'tight'. And it's clear from the reaction on MSE (as MSE as it is) that many people can see your behaviour for what it was - even if you can't.

As for her 'excessively high drinks bill' - :rotfl:

Her behaviour was fine. Not tight at all.

i_was_taught_2b_cautious

Everyone has a right to their own opinion, and it's interesting how people define what I asked in my first post.

Some people say its being careful, some people say its being tight, some people say its being jealous, and some people say other things.

There is no need to make other people feel bad, as I know people have been in difficult situations which make it impossible to think of going out, sharing a bill etc.

We do now live in a society where using vouchers is pretty normal, I myself have used them on occasions.

I heard something funny a while back

"My dad is the only person in the UK who still pays full price at Pizza Express"

FBaby

I agree with Person_one. You're not skint in the sense of my understanding of the word

What about if you allow yourself a certain amount of disposable income each month and you've run out. Couldn't you then say you're skint because you don't have any more money to spent on luxuries/leisure items, even if you have investment elsewhere for a different purpose?
I'm sure I've said that I was skint when in that situation (although only to OH and/or children).

As for the issue of the vouchers, surely it is straight forward. If in the end I end up spending no more with whichever arrangement than I would have if I'd paid what I'd consume, I wouldn't really be bothered, but if asking me to agree to a deal just so that they can end up paying much less than they would have using their vouchers to pay their own order, and doing so without explaining to me the reason for them doing so...well I wouldn't call that a friend.

In any case, if I go out with only one friend, I adopt the 'I pay this time you pay the next', even if it does often end up with 'no you paid last, no I'm sure you did', but I don't mind paying twice if I know my friend is struggling a bit financially.

What I can't stand for are people who are always looking to make a deal even of the back of their own so called friends.

tattycath

Georgiegirl256 wrote: »

Doesn't matter. The fact still remains that FM paid for the meal, actually paid the majority of the cost of the night out tbh when she could have used those vouchers to treat her/hisself to something else. They could have used them to buy their groceries, a magazine subscription, a day trip or a holiday away.

They are a valid form of payment whereas the vouchers off the internet are usually for a percentage off or a deal.

The vouchers you get of the internet etc are available to anyone to print out. FM's clubcard vouchers (regardless of whether you would have spent the money in Tesco regardless) are hers, which she chose to spend on that meal.



Her behaviour was fine. Not tight at all.

I'm with you on this Georgiegirl

Domayne

I don't see anything wrong with what feral moon did with the vouchers and wouldn't be upset if a friend did that with me, especially if they had been upfront.
The friend got a free meal out of it and got picked up. If there were no vouchers and no ride, she would have been much worse off.
This is why we have club cards, advantage cards, match and more etc to get 'rewards for spending money' why do you have to share the benefits with a friend just because they were 'free'? Sounds like entitlement to me. Would you expect your friends to share a lottery win because they got that money for 'free'??

I also hate buying birthday cards/Christmas cards as they seem like a waste of money just to sit on your fireplace for a day then go into the bin!
I only buy them for my mum because she likes to keep them for some reason and she's my mum, if it makes her happy so be it

I have money but it doesn't mean that I want to waste it on rubbish that I don't want. Like rounds at a pub. I don't really drink so that means I'm paying higher rates for someone else to enjoy whilst I have a diet coke or a bottle of water.
When it comes to restaurant bills I prefer to splitting because it's just easier than working out but if I have just had a main and a drink, I'd rather pay my £10 than pay £40 because someone else wanted to have a starter, main, dessert and a bottle of wine and I wouldn't expect anyone to sub me if the role was reversed.

I've spent over £1000 on a game at one time because that was something that I really wanted as I enjoyed the game a lot and had done for years, whilst my friend asked me if I wanted to go on holiday and told me I was 'tight' because it only cost £120 but I'd rather spend £1000 on a game....Yes because I get enjoyment out of the game and don't really want to go to butt hole nowhere.

Maybe I'm miserable but I don't care, I work for my money and I'll spend it on what I like even if it seems stupid to some people