Debt ridden family from hell

Yorkshire_Midge

@Alter - by me playing as nasty as they do. The thing they would most fear is me lifting the lid on this with their friends and acquaintances (they told them MiL was lonely!) and destroying the loving happy family relationship they try and project to people who don't know the murky side.

paddy's_mum

Your only real option is number 4 since it offers both M-i-L and you and your wife the safest way to proceed.

As to the question you ask "why should we.." Perhaps because you are not the list-of-horrible-names you have called those other leeches.

Good luck with a very difficult and upsetting situation.

kinger101

Yorkshire_Midge wrote: »

@Alter - by me playing as nasty as they do. The thing they would most fear is me lifting the lid on this with their friends and acquaintances (they told them MiL was lonely!) and destroying the loving happy family relationship they try and project to people who don't know the murky side.

Don't sink to their level. They'll want revenge, and it will only make things worse for yourselves and MiL.

Yorkshire_Midge

@Rosemary - we instinctively felt the same, but equally, we felt that was the deliberate intention. MiL is quite strong willed and was determined she wouldn't be thrown out of her home. Plus legally, if we re-housed her, they get to wash their hands of the problem for certain. So she sleeps there, but spends her time either here with us or out and about.

paddy's_mum

I've thought often over the years how useful it would be if it was possible to 'divorce' relatives and get a court ordered judgement over who does what and who gets what....

Yorkshire_Midge

@Kinger - couldn't get MUCH worse! You're right of course, plus it has the disadvantage that they know I'm not the sort of person to fight that dirty.

Yorkshire_Midge

@Paddys mum - if we had the financial means and weren't the wrong side of 50 ourselves, option 4 is a no-brainer.


I like the "divorce" idea! Perhaps we could have the equiv of a pre nup too!

Alter_ego

Yorkshire_Midge wrote: »

I'm not the sort of person to fight that dirty.

No point in fighting really, I can't see they have done anything illegal. Underhand and deceitful yes, but nothing you can do about that. Choose a path that leads forward, forget what's in the past.

moneyistooshorttomention

Ohmygawd - the poor woman. I do hope this can be resolved satisfactorily.

How much money have these leaches had from her? Though I have the nasty feeling she's going to have to kiss goodbye to it unfortunately:( - but I guess it helps clarify things somewhat if its worked out just how much they have conned her for.

I think an urgent appointment with the Citizens Advice Bureau - asking them if they have a legal advisor attached (which they probably do) to get their advice on this is necessary.

The one absolute certainty is not to "throw good money after bad" and put any further money in their direction (ie paying towards that extension they promised her). I'd say its 99.9% certain that money would just get lost as well and she needs to be very very sure she protects that part of her own money these leaches havent yet managed to get their hands on.

I would think it might also be worth ringing a suitable sympathetic local councillor and (as calmly as possible - which I know isnt going to be easy in the circumstances) try and explain the "basics" only of the situation she is in/give her age (ie the older she is - the greater the chance she might experience a bit of positive "age discrimination" in getting allocated some public sector housing of some description or being able to buy some private sector accommodation targeted at the over-55s). Don't whatever you do go off into any unnecessary details to them. Don't whatever you do do any "ranting". Yes - I know it will be hard - but you need the pure unemotional facts of the case put as briefly as possible and asking their opinion as to what they think the options are.

EDIT; Maybe Shelter might have some ideas as well on how she can get alternative housing.

moneyistooshorttomention

I'd add the fact of "Revenge is a dish best served cold". Keep your powder dry and one day in the future the chance might arise to deal with what they've done to her.

For right now - try and stay calm. Yep...I know full well it won't be easy.:cool: