Accident at nursery

ravilious_fan

Birdie85 wrote: »

Oh don't be so narrow minded ravilious. A woman doesn't stop being a person in her own right the minute her child is born. I both *have* to work for the money (yet DS is only 'dumped' at nursery - where the average age of the staff there is ~35, so hardly teens - 1.5 days a week, other times he is cared for by my DH, my Mum and MIL), but I also *choose* to work as it's important for me to have a life just for me and have people speak to me about something other than Playdoh and poo! If I was a SAHM I'd probably be depressed. Selfish? Perhaps, but I'd rather be selfish than suffering from depression!

Not really relevant to you then

No-one is saying that women should have no other life than changing nappies. (Though I expect some people on here might choose to interpret it that way )

We are talking about people who dump their child on a nursery for 12 hours a day full time and go to work because their career is more important than the child's wellbeing. Work, which in some cases on here seems to involve spending several hours chatting on an internet forum :laugh:

quidsy

How much childcare did you take on when your kids were small?

beckstar1975

I have 3 children 3 years apart, had terrible terrible PND and it was only finding an excellent nursery and returning back to work that got me to a full semblance of decent mental health. Due to that I was a much better mummy (and yes DH went part time and I worked full time). At the time we lost out with one of us working (we earn the same) as nursery fees over £2k a month, but now eldest about to start secondary school I haven't had to try and re-enter the workplace and am earning far more than if I had quit to look after kids.

Kids also have most varied diet/tastes of most kids I know and put that down to the wide variety of foods they were fed at nursery.

Best think to do is what is best for OPs sister and her daughter, not for OP - and frankly I find your posts rather sinister and am in doubt that the child would cope better being allowed to explore and have (minor) accidents and learn independence than be hovered over all day just in case.

Jagraf

ravilious_fan wrote: »

Not really relevant to you then

No-one is saying that women should have no other life than changing nappies. (Though I expect some people on here might choose to interpret it that way )

We are talking about people who dump their child on a nursery for 12 hours a day full time and go to work because their career is more important than the child's wellbeing. Work, which in some cases on here seems to involve spending several hours chatting on an internet forum :laugh:

My daughter went to nursery full time and I worked full time and my salary just covered the nursery cost. I did this because I took my child and did what I thought was best for my child. She loved nursery. I was objective in my decision making. Sixteen years on (she went from a baby) she is doing psychology A level and is looking forward to doing a pyschology degree. We have interesting discussions about attachment theories as she was in nursery, I was a single mum for a while, and she is close to her stepdad. Fact of the matter is that she feels privileged to be so loved and has very good memories of nursery - some of the kids are still close friends with her and she babysits for the woman who was one of her nursery nurses.

So on my deathbed I will actually be very proud that I made such a good decision.

I take it that 'dumping' means you had one, you look after it - do you home schooled, never visited a doctor, never dumped your kids on unsuspecting family members ?

That article by the way (the one you quoted) has nothing to do with the children it is about how some mothers find being at home worthwhile for themselves - that's fine, but has nothing to do with anything we are talking about on here.

SingleSue

ravilious_fan wrote: »

The welfare of the child comes first, second and third. Mums do not have to look for work until the child is of school age. The reason for that is that studies have shown that being with the mother in the early years is highly beneficial to the child. It's also beneficial to the mother, if you read the article I gave a link to earlier on. If that wasn't the case the government would be forcing all mums who've just given birth to go out looking for work. Think about it. George Osbourne doesn't dole out money to people who don't need it.

I am not criticizing you, I think what you're doing is very well-meaning, but the child's wellbeing needs to come before the parent's. I can see why a few people on here stamp their feet when they read/hear that, but nobody is forced to have a child! If you have one, look after it.

Surely you mean a parent rather than mum or the mother...dads can stay at home (if they so wish and can afford it, the mum could after all be the main earner) and look after the children just as well as mum can.

ravilious_fan

Jagraf wrote: »

My daughter went to nursery full time and I worked full time and my salary just covered the nursery cost.

Not really worth it then (financially)?

She loved nursery.

How do you know? Were you there? Did the baby speak and tell you?

I was objective in my decision making.

...meaning?

Sixteen years on (she went from a baby) she is doing psychology A level and is looking forward to doing a pyschology degree. We have interesting discussions about attachment theories as she was in nursery, I was a single mum for a while, and she is close to her stepdad.

What going to nursery (or not) has to do with an A level in psychology I don't quite know. Close relative of mine did psychology and maths to degree level. Both are interesting subjects, and both connected, funnily enough.

So on my deathbed I will actually be very proud that I made such a good decision.

Brilliant :rotfl: :T

That article by the way (the one you quoted) has nothing to do with the children it is about how some mothers find being at home worthwhile for themselves - that's fine, but has nothing to do with anything we are talking about on here.

The thread has gone very off topic, as the OP hasn't yet told us what the accident or incident was!

FBaby

George Osbourne doesn't dole out money to people who don't need it.

Osbourne is also introducing money to incentivise people on low income to save on a monthly basis. I wonder whether this is because of the impact family debts have on the children, or wasting their income on things they don't need hence depriving their children of positive opportunities.

How do you know? Were you there? Did the baby speak and tell you?

This made me laugh! Thankfully as a parent, I learnt to pick up on signs that child was happy or not rather than just waited for her to be able to speak to tell me just like most parents do!

hazyjo

ravilious_fan wrote: »

Work, which in some cases on here seems to involve spending several hours chatting on an internet forum :laugh:

Seeing as a lot of people are paid for the set hours they do, not the amount of work they do, it's a bit pointless lol. I'm twiddling my thumbs at the moment but was rushed off my feet earlier. If they want to pay me tens of thousands to sit here while I comment on a forum or enter competitions, I'm not gonna complain...


Anyway, no kids so can do what I like


Jx

Jagraf

ravilious_fan wrote: »

Not really worth it then (financially)?


How do you know? Were you there? Did the baby speak and tell you?


...meaning?



What going to nursery (or not) has to do with an A level in psychology I don't quite know. Close relative of mine did psychology and maths to degree level. Both are interesting subjects, and both connected, funnily enough.



Brilliant :rotfl: :T



The thread has gone very off topic, as the OP hasn't yet told us what the accident or incident was!

Yes it was financially worth it - I enjoy my work and my daughter enjoyed nursery.

Babies react to situations and as they get older they talk to you - mine stayed till school age - it's quite obvious really.

You brought up psychology when you shared your link - so you don't think any psychology goes into research ???? How do you know what's best for a baby without psychology ? They don't talk to you .....

Why are you rotfl laughing at the deathbed situation - you suggested what peopke might think on their deathbed. Or were you just laughing at why I would be pleased in which case that's fine, my deathbed, my choice to feel what I want.

What do you think of working dads by the way as you don't really acknowledge them.

prosaver

say your thinking off to put a claim in
and then, your child, from now on, will be the most supervised kid there.
I made a big thing of it too.
when my son got injured I
look up heath and safety act and proceeder's after an accident.
Also start quoting risk assessment .. works all the time:D