Deal Breakers in relationships

Anatidaephobia

Religion isn't a deal breaker for me; my partner comes from a religious family and I do not. Nobody in his family expects me to change or do anything religious. It does mean though that I end up in church more often than I otherwise would, for weddings, funerals, etc, for their side of the family. I remain seated while they go to receive communion. Other than that, it doesn't really have any impact on my life.

Andypandyboy

Dealbreakers for me:

Unkindness
Lack of intelligence
Tatoos
Lazy
Lack of get up and go
Lack of a compatible moral compass.
Not family orientated.

juliethemuse

Female
A dealbreaker for me would be if they didn't like cats. I am a crazy cat lady so it just wouldn't work if he wasn't a cat lover.

DKLS

Religion
and
Lack of ambition.

Not just for rising up the career ladder and acquiring stuff, but more ambition for life, to try new experiences, travel the world, read more, learn more, have adventures, and doing more to improve yourself.

onlyroz

Jagraf wrote: »

I'm just saying it does work, it depends on the two people involved, no more or less than anything else.

Im not sure what people can say - you can't love a religious partner - that's your choice but it doesn't mean others can't.

If it works for you then great. However, it shouldn't be so perplexing that it would be a deal-breaker for many other people.

Gloomendoom

onlyroz wrote: »

From the point of view of the religious person, how could they be happy living with somebody that they would not be able to share the afterlife with?

From the point of view of the non-religious person, how could they be happy living with somebody who is more concerned with pleasing a being they consider to be imaginary, than with focussing on the real-world things around them?

I can see your point if you are referring to fundamentalist religious or atheist nutters getting together but, at least in the Christian faith that I am most familiar with, the things that are done to please the being that some people believe to be imaginary are just things that any decent non-believer would do as well.

MandM90

DKLS wrote: »

Religion
and
Lack of ambition.

Not just for rising up the career ladder and acquiring stuff, but more ambition for life, to try new experiences, travel the world, read more, learn more, have adventures, and doing more to improve yourself.

This is what I mean by lack of ambition. Contentment is important but never wanting to experience anything new? Nahhh!

Not sure I'd mind a religious person too much but I'm not sure how I'd feel if they wanted to discuss it. I discuss sewing with my OH but he believes in the existence of my sewing machine, which makes it easier.

DKLS

MandM90 wrote: »

This is what I mean by lack of ambition. Contentment is important but never wanting to experience anything new? Nahhh!

Not sure I'd mind a religious person too much but I'm not sure how I'd feel if they wanted to discuss it. I discuss sewing with my OH but he believes in the existence of my sewing machine, which makes it easier.

Contentment is great but dull, I like to be challenged and love new experiences, when I met my wife she very much a package tour to europe type, I introduced her to winging it and getting lost, she now loves getting lost and has the same curiosity that I have, what is around that corner?, what does that weird thing on the menu taste like?

I see the world like a book with each country being a chapter, and if you only live and holiday in one place, to me you are only reading one page and missing out.

As to religion, it didn't put me off as a teenager, I used to attend the local church group and pretend to be a christian as there was lots of young ladies who claimed to be pious and wholesome, They certainly weren't . The rumours about a Pastor's daughter are very true.

Mr_Toad

DKLS wrote: »

Contentment is great but dull, I like to be challenged and love new experiences, when I met my wife she very much a package tour to europe type, I introduced her to winging it and getting lost, she now loves getting lost and has the same curiosity that I have, what is around that corner?, what does that weird thing on the menu taste like?

I see the world like a book with each country being a chapter, and if you only live and holiday in one place, to me you are only reading one page and missing out.

As to religion, it didn't put me off as a teenager, I used to attend the local church group and pretend to be a christian as there was lots of young ladies who claimed to be pious and wholesome, They certainly weren't . The rumours about a Pastor's daughter are very true.

What on earth makes you link contentment with dullness?

Do you assume that being content means sitting about in some sort of mindless daze of indifference, lacking the motivation to do much of interest?

I can assure you contentment is nothing of the sort, it's being happy doing whatever it is you're doing.

Verix

Male:

Don't really I have any major 'red line' issues, but probably

Stupid
Aggressive

and that's it! When I was younger I thought I would never be with someone who smoked or did drugs then I did, but she doesn't do anything other than a social smoke nowadays. Equally didn't think that I could be with someone who is religious but again am with a Christian now. I'm a pretty staunch atheist and personally think the world would be a lot better if everyone else was as well, however I still go to church with her every few months to show my face.

To the person who asked why she would be with me if we can't be in heaven together; she thinks that as long as you're a good person you go through the pearly gates to see all your friends and family (I always wonder what happens if those friends and family don't want to see you but that's for another day). Equally that same belief that being good is the most important thing means aside from a bit of praying she's just like everyone else.