Throwing out my 19 year old step son!

POPPYOSCAR

C_Mababejive wrote: »

What drugs are we talking about anyway..?

OP post 18


"legal highs"

Mojisola

sdoherty1000 wrote: »

For the last 3 years my partners son has been a nightmare, stealing from his siblings, arrogant, drugs, drinking and general neglect of property and his lack of respect for other family members in the house. He does not listen to any house rules that are set.

balletshoes wrote: »

and yet on his previous recent thread the OP described his ex-wife as - "She has her flaws but being a bad mother isn't one of them"

How can someone be a good mother but allow one sibling to subject the others to this behaviour?

POPPYOSCAR

Mojisola wrote: »

How can someone be a good mother but allow one sibling to subject the others to this behaviour?

Those are the words of the OP that Balletshoes quoted.


And if the situation is that bad surely he would seek custody of at least his own child, and yet he has said he would not.

Dasa

We had problems with our son which I posted about a few years ago.We didn't throw him out because we would never do that to one of our kids. In the end he moved in with his girlfriend and her parents and it was a relief. He had a very comfortable life there but he has since apologised and said he now realises he was in the wrong and needed to grow up.


Sometimes there is nothing you can do but stick to your principles and ride out the storm.

SnooksNJ

sdoherty1000 wrote: »

They way he has behaved and her unreasonable decision making is mostly what lead to the marriage breakdown to begin with. He would do something, I would have a go at him then she would have a go at me for having a go at him. So he just realised that he could do what he wanted when he wanted and that turned him into what he is today...It wasn't about sitting down and all coming to a mutual agreement it was her way only and he abused it. As for taking my daughter away from her mother and her brothers, I did consider it but have decided against it now, as I think she would be better to be raised by a woman and doing girly things...Unless she turns out like her mother that is!

A lot of women posters on here saying they would throw out the husband before the children and that surprises me to be honest, I expected haters on the thread but I cant seem to get my head around how they think letting him carry on in his ways is a good idea, and how quickly they jump to throw out the husband over an unruly child/adult.

He was supposed to be heading off to university last year, that was his plan, but due to his sheer laziness, truanting and unwillingness to do college work he failed the course yet again, for the second year in a row. I was counting down the days thinking great, out of my hair and someone else's problem....nope!

Luckily he has just failed his 4th driving test as he is the type to drive around drunk or high or both

I would rethink that do girly things with her Mom offsets her living in a toxic environment.

C_Mababejive

POPPYOSCAR wrote: »

OP post 18


"legal highs"

Thanks Poppy. Well having read #18 i think the only solution is for OP to plan his exit strategy so that he suffers least damage. It seems to me that his partner is either burying her head in the sand or else she is disrespecting this man as much as her son is..

duchy

I have to wonder if the son is simply after having watched the marriage disintegrate attempting to speed the OP's exit .

We are hearing one side only.....and the marriage has effectively ended but the OP hasn't left. One has to wonder why if the home atmosphere is so bad.

POPPYOSCAR

OP


Is the children's father anywhere in the picture?


It seems strange for the step-son to say "you are not my father"
if you have brought him up from the age of 2 and he has known no other father.

xsinaftersinx

Make life difficult, my Dad did the same for my step brother. He removed the door to his bedroom until it was tidied. Turned off wifi every night when he went to bed so he couldn't go on-line with either a computer or games console, didn't wash his clothes, cook him meals, I think at one point he also removed all of the power cables in his room to all his tech as why should he pay for all of the electricity when my brother wasn't contributing. The attitude soon changed when he realised he had no privacy, no clean clothes and no way to contact his mates unless he charged his phone at their house.

Mojisola

xsinaftersinx wrote: »

Make life difficult

The attitude soon changed when he realised he had no privacy, no clean clothes and no way to contact his mates unless he charged his phone at their house.

But the mother wouldn't let the OP treat her son like this!