Throwing out my 19 year old step son!

Tigsteroonie

If you co-own the house, and this is your wife's son, then you have no right to force him to leave - not whilst she wants him there.

You will end up forcing your wife to choose between her son and you ... and you probably won't like the outcome to that.

balletshoes

heuchera wrote: »

Is the wife earning her own money and contributing financially? If she isn't then good luck to her and druggy son when he decides to change the locks while they're out.

from a quick look at the other thread referenced to here, it seems the OP and his estranged wife earn around the same amounts, so I'm guessing she'd also be able to get a locksmith if the OP wanted to go down that route.

Rosemary7391

If the son can't be made to leave, would the other children go with OP if he left? They might if it gets them clear of the wayward son...

POPPYOSCAR

Rosemary7391 wrote: »

If the son can't be made to leave, would the other children go with OP if he left? They might if it gets them clear of the wayward son...

And leave their own mother to go with their step-dad?

heuchera

balletshoes wrote: »

from a quick look at the other thread referenced to here, it seems the OP and his estranged wife earn around the same amounts, so I'm guessing she'd also be able to get a locksmith if the OP wanted to go down that route.

I had a quick look a the first post and yes it looks like they're splitting up anyway. They just need to decide who lives where and how to proceed. The soon to be ex-wife had 3 kids in rapid succession by her previous partner(s) - only the youngest child is the OP's. The 19 year old boy is her problem, then.

It's just a question of how he can get to keep the house and get rid of her and druggy eldest son. Maybe go for parental custody of his own child (and mention the drugs problem and the mum effectively enabling it) ? Sounds like it could be a social services issue if the younger children are having to suffer because of this young man's behaviour at home.

POPPYOSCAR

heuchera wrote: »

I had a quick look a the first post and yes it looks like they're splitting up anyway. They just need to decide who lives where and how to proceed. The soon to be ex-wife had 3 kids in rapid succession by her previous partner(s) - only the youngest child is the OP's. The 19 year old boy is her problem, then.

It's just a question of how he can get to keep the house and get rid of her and druggy eldest son. Maybe go for parental custody of his own child (and mention the drugs problem and the mum effectively enabling it) ? Sounds like it could be a social services issue if the younger children are having to suffer because of this young man's behaviour at home.

If I remember correctly the 'drugs' are legal highs.


I doubt social services would get involved with this. The children are not babies, they are 14, 16 and 17.

*Robin*

Can't help wondering whether Estranged Wife and Unruly Son are hoping Son's behaviour will force OP to move out...?

sdoherty1000

They way he has behaved and her unreasonable decision making is mostly what lead to the marriage breakdown to begin with. He would do something, I would have a go at him then she would have a go at me for having a go at him. So he just realised that he could do what he wanted when he wanted and that turned him into what he is today...It wasn't about sitting down and all coming to a mutual agreement it was her way only and he abused it. As for taking my daughter away from her mother and her brothers, I did consider it but have decided against it now, as I think she would be better to be raised by a woman and doing girly things...Unless she turns out like her mother that is!

A lot of women posters on here saying they would throw out the husband before the children and that surprises me to be honest, I expected haters on the thread but I cant seem to get my head around how they think letting him carry on in his ways is a good idea, and how quickly they jump to throw out the husband over an unruly child/adult.

He was supposed to be heading off to university last year, that was his plan, but due to his sheer laziness, truanting and unwillingness to do college work he failed the course yet again, for the second year in a row. I was counting down the days thinking great, out of my hair and someone else's problem....nope!

Luckily he has just failed his 4th driving test as he is the type to drive around drunk or high or both

sdoherty1000

Tigsteroonie wrote: »

If you co-own the house, and this is your wife's son, then you have no right to force him to leave - not whilst she wants him there.

You will end up forcing your wife to choose between her son and you ... and you probably won't like the outcome to that.

I have no right to throw him out? So your saying only the woman gets to make that decision? I have as much right to tell him to leave as she has to tell him to stay.

balletshoes

sdoherty1000 wrote: »

I have no right to throw him out? So your saying only the woman gets to make that decision? I have as much right to tell him to leave as she has to tell him to stay.

thats exactly what we're (nearly all) saying - yes you can tell him to leave, his mum can tell him to stay. So where does that get you?

And I think, on this thread, theres only been one poster in over 50 posts who has suggested she'd throw her husband out before her children, hasn't there?