Is it normal to become bored and fed up with a relationship?

Caleb11

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balletshoes

i'm not divorced, and yes there are times when you can get stale in a relationship, and then its up to each of you (ie the one who is feeling its stale) to do something about it to shake it up.

In your case, until you said you were relocating back home in a short time, I'd have said I didn't hold out much hope that your situation would improve because of logistics. But I would wait until you've moved "home" together as a family, see if that makes a difference to how you feel, for yourself, and inside the relationship.

whitewing

I think it is normal for the number of life changes you have had in your recent life. Reminds me of when DH and I went through similar and my expectations of the way 'he' (ie perfect husband) should behave. It was very easy not to notice what he did do, and just take it for granted. Maybe you have lost the ability to communicate because everything seems to hang on successful communication. Sounds like you are both hurting and scared in your own way.

Pixie5740

It sounds like the 7 year itch.

Helen_Winkelhock

Relationships are tricky places to be in.
Sometimes, it makes you feel like the happiest person in the world.
And at other times, it spirals you back onto the ground and makes you wonder if you even want to be in one.You don’t need to feel guilty if you’re getting bored with your relationship. You just need to understand why you’re bored and do something about it!

Caleb11

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Mojisola

Caleb11 wrote: »

Anyway I don't have any family in my new location as we relocated for jobs and my sister came to visit us.

I was quite down about everything and he knew this and I asked to go for dinner with my sister for some "me time".

He said no basically - but I talked him round and I went out.

I'm 24 and never get any time away from my family and I feel hurt. He goes away for work a lot and a part of this is having "nights out" with his work mates. I hate how I need to beg him at 24 to have a life.

You had to ask permission to go out with your sister?

Caleb11

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balletshoes

Caleb11 wrote: »

Thanks. Your so right about the different feelings a relationship can bring.

It sounds simple but I just don't know why I'm bored or what to do about it! I think the only thing that might help is moving home and then maybe our relationship will improve.

I just know my feelings have sort of changed. I was content, happy and incredibly faithful to him.
Now I just feel agitated and longing for freedom and to be alone. Well not alone but not in a relationship.

that could be because logistically you are trapped, you don't have your freedom, but you will be able to regain that when you move "home" together, won't you?

Mojisola

Caleb11 wrote: »

But in other ways he feels more like a father figure - quite controlling and possessive and I often feel like I need to hide things (like spending money) to save him lecturing me.

He goes away for work a lot and a part of this is having "nights out" with his work mates. I hate how I need to beg him at 24 to have a life.

But I hate my situation. I feel trapped and like I need to stay as we are a family. But I don't feel in love with him. I'm not physically attracted to him anymore and I know that's shallow and I can actually get past that - but I don't feel an emotional connection to him either.

I don't have any friends or family or life. I have him and my son and feel no connection with him.

We have planned to move "home" after Christmas and I'm hoping that may help our relationship as we can have a babysitter and maybe some date nights and I can go out with friends again. But at the moment I just feel so down/stressed in my current situation. I work full time and so does he although he works much more than full time (he's on call a lot and works in IT so basically spends all night on the laptop.)

There's a lot of alarm bells ringing in the things you say.

I would suggest hanging on until you've moved back home and see if things improve.

You also need to let him know that you aren't happy about the way life is - you are two equal adults, not senior and junior partners.

If he won't look after his son so that you can go out and have a social life and see friends and family, then the money for a babysitter will have to found.

Caleb11

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