1st Christmas Together

Qtipps4

I hope you are doing well. Chin up and all that. It's hard looking in from outside and maybe doesn't feel like it just now but I too believe you've had a lucky escape. Why not have that chat before Christmas saving you some stress, time hanging about waiting, let alone money. All the best for your future. Good luck.

pinkduvetdiva

Sounds like a nasty piece of work to me - if she saw you as more like friends, why did she let you contribute towards the cost of Christmas? I agree with the posters that reckon there's more to it with her "ex" that she's letting on. Charge it to the card of life and move on - it's been an expensive lesson, but at least you know where you stand. Hopefully in time you'll find someone who will treat you the way you deserve to be treated.

Slinky

Whiteknight wrote: »

We have spoken and I've been told that she does not consider us a couple anymore, she mentioned that she had felt we have been more like friends for quite some time now - blaming a lack of "us" time for a lot of it. She has said that she would like to remain friends with me, how that would work out I'm not quite sure!

Well that's a bit bl00dy convenient now Christmas is out the way isn't it!


Who needs friends like her? I bet she'd become more friendly when Valentine's Day, kids birthdays etc roll round.


She's a user, I hope it's been a useful life lesson for you.


Put it down to experience. Experience is what you get when you didn't get what you wanted.

goodwithsaving

Ditch her. She wants to be friends with your wallet, not you. Not all are like that and you will find somebody far better in time. I've been there, it's heartbreaking but in hindsight, I wish I'd had the courage to move on sooner. Good luck.

surveyqueenuk

If you do decide to stay friends (which I sincerely hope you don't, you clearly deserve MUCH better) then please don't give in to any emotional blackmail when birthdays etc. come around. You know what I mean, "Little Katie is sooooo desperate for a iPad for her birthday, all her friends have got one and she feels so left out and I feel so guilty because I can't afford it". Don't give in to any of this!

Pollycat

steph2901 wrote: »

If she felt like that for some time, then she should not have asked you to pay for her kids christmas presents or her food shopping!

You are better off without her as she doesn't sound very honest and seems like a user. I don't think I'd want her as a friend either!

THIS 100% ^^^^

I think anyone who lets someone believe they have a future together, lets you give a significant amount of money towards her childrens' Christmas presents because she would struggle to afford them herself and (I think this is worst of all) pay for all her Christmas food when she knew damn well you wouldn't be invited to partake of most of it is a real nasty piece of work.

Take comfort in the fact that you've escaped before being drawn in to her financial problems

Whiteknight wrote: »

we have had arguments over money previously which is why I am reluctant to speak to her directly about it, I've always saved for the things I need or what but if she needs something she will get it.

You deserve better and I'm sure you'll find someone to appreciate you for you, not your money.

Good luck for the future.