Feel so alone

f0xh0les

Hey Pops,
At 13 your son can totally understand, 'ooops, I don't have any money left in the budget this week, we'll have a look next week'. 13 is a bit young to understand the 'whole', and by the time he is a bit older, you will have busted some of your debt, and every one that is paid off, is more money available to chuck at the next one, with more left over for treats that he is going to remember.

My kids have never had a bucket and spade holiday abroad. I feel awful about it. All their friends seem to go off all the time, but then I realised they are going with their grandparents, who are paying for all 3 generations to go away.

And as you are paying £650 a month to your debts, they are going to reduce quite quickly. Put them in your message signature, change colour every month and watch those numbers go down.

Am I right in thinking you are currently £30,436 ?
Does that mean this time next month you will be under £30k?
Well that will deserve a _party_ from me. It is the little steps down that you need to aim for. That and making sure you keep on 0% deals for as long as you can. But you know that already, don't you, cos you are dealing with this. Well done.

Keep strong!

Popstess

Thank you 12 month, ch1979 and foxholes.
I tend to get a bit obsessed and I think that's when I get overwhelmed and depressed then want to give up (not that giving up is an option)
I'm going to try and put the BIG number out of my head for now and concentrate on paying one debt at a time. I will continue to make my minimum payments and over pay on one until it's paid off the first one I'm concentrating on is my very account £912.
While sticking to my budget plan and paying any spare money off my very.

12_month_challenge

f0xh0les wrote: »

Hey Pops,

Am I right in thinking you are currently £30,436 ?
Does that mean this time next month you will be under £30k?
Keep strong!

Hey pops I never looked at it like this :T

Would help to keep you focussed :A

12_month_challenge

Popstess wrote: »

Thank you 12 month, ch1979 and foxholes.
and put the BIG number out of my head for now and concentrate on paying one debt at a time. I will continue to make my minimum payments and over pay on one until it's paid off the first one I'm concentrating on is my very account £912.
While sticking to my budget plan and paying any spare money off my very.

This is exactly how I am playing it. Targeting one at a time, overpaying it whilst still paying the others.

My target CC was on £12,538.10 :eek:
Its currently on £11,210.00 :mad: I have a big payment going to it tomorrow or Thursday so it will be under the £11.000

Still very high but coming down at least.

I love the way you are planning different ways to sort it out :A

Ch1979

My friends are paying off their wedding £18000 plus two car loans 12000. They owe just as much as you and it doesn't make their debt more noble just because they have bought 3 "large" purchases. Do you think they feel as terrible as you? Bet they don't..... And this time next month u will be under the 30k debt. And as time goes on, you'll save less as you gradually come out of credit or account agreements, get cashback and discounts on purchases and figure out how to maintain an enjoyable lifestyle. People will buy anything, you'll sell things that aren't necessities or loved items. This is the hard bit, learning how to live for less. Is there any part of this process you are enjoying (ie being part of a forum or investigating ways to save money)? Are you arty, practical or have any hobbies, interests, specialist skills?

lessonlearned

Popstess - just to echo what others have said. There really is no need to hang your head in shame. Debt happens - for all sorts of reasons.

In my case it was £30k racked up when my husband got sick. It doesnt mean that my debt was "good" and that other peoples debt is "bad"

. At the end of the day its all debt........so don't feel bad or guilty. Just resolve to get it cleared but don't worry too much about the time frame. It's not a race.

I still maintain you need to live too, especially when you have children - you do need to allow for some fun and treats now and again, even if it means adding a year on to your debt free journey.

Just keep going and making steady progress and you will get there. You are doing really well, getting a handle on things and facing up to it in such a positive manner.

You can pay down debts and still have a great life, it just takes a bit of planning and being a bit creative. I decided to make the best of a bad job and think of it as a challenge.

I have now cleared my debts but I still live quite simply. I actually prefer a simple uncluttered life now. I don't crave "stuff" - in fact even though I have no debts I'm still selling and donating things.

I still relish the challenge of sniffing out good deals and bargain hunting even though I am no longer in debt.

I am now a widow and retired and my income is relatively modest, however, thanks to all I learned on my debt free journey I am able to live quite comfortably.

One your debts are cleared you will be able to live very well on your income.

Just keep your "eyes on the prize" - the time will whizz by and before you know it you will have wiped out that £30k.

craftyali

I have not been able to read all the way through this thread, but just wanted to say how wonderfully supportive/positive everyone is on here. I feel alone, as noone knows how much my debt really is. Even keep the full amount from hubby. I am doing everything I can to pay off as much as possible each month, and hoping to clear it within 2 years. It is great to come on here and know that there are others with the same struggle. Ali x

Popstess

Hi everyone :wave:
Bit of a positive update from me for a change. Trying to concentrate on sticking to a budget and paying my very debt down.
Worked out that because Feb and March are council tax free months but the £81 is budgeted for I have decided to pay that off my very this month and next which means I will only have £21 to find to pay the rest of the bnpl that is only j retest free until April so pleased with that.
It also means that my very account is now standing at £831
Small victories and all that!

12_month_challenge

Thats a great idea Pops. Like you said small victories and that :T

Thats the best way to go about it. one at a time.

So glad you are feeling more positive now. Little steps like this will help you get to your ultimate goal :beer:
xx

Ch1979

Well done! It sounds as if you are getting yourself sorted. Funny how our brains work, you took a positive turn when you decided to focus on the one debt?
Reading a few of your previous posts you can tell you are on an upward spiral :-) Big victory