Name change after marriage?

lexilex

I just wanted to say I totally get where you are coming from OP.

We are getting married next year. When we first got engaged I was determined not to change my name. It's not that my surname is particularly unique or anything like that but it's mine, and my families. My OH's surname is also really long, and one of those that has to be spelled out each time I give it to anyone, and even then they still get it wrong.

I have decided though to go ahead with the name change, mainly because we want children and the thought of them having a different surname to myself makes me feel really sad. We have agreed though that if we're lucky enough to have children, the first will be given my surname as their middle name to carry on the name in some way.

TonyMMM

If you don't change he may not like it, but he'll get over it.

The really important thing is to agree what name any children will be brought up in - it avoids a screaming row in front of the registrar in the future when registering a birth (which does happen).

Like it or not, the vast majority of couples go with tradition and use the father's name as the surname for children no matter what name mum uses but as per the previous poster I quite like using the mother's maiden name as a child's middle name ( which is a very traditional way of keeping a maternal family name going ).

angel11

I got married 18 months ago & haven't changed my surname. Hubby doesn't mind 1 bit, even when he sometimes gets called Mr MyName :rotfl: My mother, however, took great offence, asking why I'd even bothered to get married at all, & calling me by my hubby's name :mad:

We're now wanting to start a family, & I'm considering changing my name now - as others have said, I don't like the thought of having a different surname from my child. Quite like the idea of using my name as a middle name though, it's quite a popular first name anyway, so would be a nice touch.

Tigsteroonie

angel11 wrote: »

We're now wanting to start a family, & I'm considering changing my name now - as others have said, I don't like the thought of having a different surname from my child.

But the child can have either surname - so you could give your child your own surname, and then the father has the odd-one-out surname

In hospital, our son was automatically given my surname rather than his father's. He stayed in NICU for 11 weeks, we registered the birth at around 3 weeks once I got out of hospital. We opted to give him father's surname - but NICU said that was confusing, so littl'un was still known by my surname until he was discharged.

System

o01shorty10o wrote: »

And why is that?

Because the legislation has not been updated to account for changes in the social attitudes

Mojisola

!!!!!! wrote: »

Because the legislation has not been updated to account for changes in the social attitudes

There is no legislation to update.

A woman changing her name on marriage is a convention, not a law.

SeduLOUs

I won't be changing my name when I get married. It's not about me having a love of my identity or a determination to keep my family name (although I have no particular desire either to take on current boyfriend's surname which belongs to a father who abandoned him as a baby). It's more that whilst I don't have any particularly special reason not to change my name, by the same token, I have no special reason to have the same name as my partner, so I don't think it's worth all the fussing about with paperwork.

I could kinda understand wanting the same name when children are involved, but as I don't intend to have any I don't really think it makes much difference.

I'd never go double barrelled. It can only work once anyway. For example, what if I became Smith-Jones and passed that name onto a daughter, who then went on to marry a Hamilton-Davies. What name would they choose then? Quad-barrel? Nope, that would just be ridiculous.

amistupid

harrys_nan wrote: »

My son has recently married after living with his now wife for a good few years.
His wife has gone double barreled, she felt the same as you but my son still just has his surname.
Whichever way you choose to go is very much up to you,

You must think carefully about taking the double barrelled option.

Georgiegirl256

Out,_Vile_Jelly wrote: »

, Poppy Fields
?

I love that name! I think it sounds lovely!

:rotfl: at the post above mine, that is hilarious!

pollypenny

I wish I'd kept my maiden name, but it was very rare in those far off days. It's a lovely Welsh name, while my married name is awkward and always has to be spelled out.

All the children and grandchildren have my maiden name as a middle name. My sister uses it, so I am the only one without it.

Maybe I'll adopt it now!