Who should pay?

Woolwich_Kim

Georgiegirl256 wrote: »

Once again, I have never heard of anyone having to pay for their own gift....that is why it's called a gift. Something someone buys for you, which is then yours to do with as you please.

It's an unfortunate situation, but there is no way she should have to pay you anything....it. Was. A. Gift.

Once again, I would see it as her paying for MY ticket. My ticket is not her gift.

gingercordial

Woolwich_Kim, this a silly thing to fall out over when there is an obvious solution: sell the tickets.

You will probably need the actual tickets so you can ring up Ticketmaster/similar to change the delivery method and have them posted to you, or even go to the venue box office any day you like and they will most likely print them there and then. You don't have to wait for the day of the concert. I have done exactly this in order to collect paper tickets to be able to sell them when I couldn't go to a gig.

Then go onto somewhere like Seatwave (that's the one I've used), Viagogo or whatever, and list them for £5 less than the next highest pair, which will probably mean a profit if it is sold out, or even if they do sell for a loss it won't be a £200 loss. Then tell her that the matter is solved, you sold them, no need for her to find someone else to go or feel bad. Everyone is happy.

If you don't do this, as far as "fairness" is concerned you have not even tried to rectify the situation and so the onus is entirely on you.

I don't see why you seem so resistant to selling.

Person_one

Woolwich_Kim wrote: »

Once again, I would see it as her paying for MY ticket. My ticket is not her gift.

She did nothing to incur that cost though, you didn't have her agreement or consent to put her on the hook for that amount of money!

You chose, with no pressure from her and no expectation, to buy a very expensive gift. That it didn't work out and you now regret spending that much doesn't mean she is responsible for you shelling out in the first place!

It's incredibly rare to get such consensus on this forum OP, I personally wouldn't ignore that!

mellymoo74

Did she ask you to buy the tickets
No
So why do you think she has any obligation to give you a penny
And how can you think punishing someone your calling a friend cos you haven't got your own way is reasonable
Please tell my your 14 please because if your an adult and behave like this how did you get friends in the first place

*max*

Woolwich_Kim wrote: »

Once again, I would see it as her paying for MY ticket. My ticket is not her gift.

Why should she pay for your ticket? No reason you can't use it, bar not wanting to. The only way you'll lose money on YOUR ticket is if you don't go. If you CHOOSE not to use it, it's your problem.

All of it is your problem, none of it is hers.

Her ticket: unwanted gift, just like anything else you may have bought her and she didn't use.

Your ticket: it's yours, use it or don't, it's your choice. Just because you don't want to use it, doesn't mean she should pay for it.

Woolwich_Kim

I'm not resistant to selling.

The last I heard from her, she said she will ask her friends to go in her place. I don't want to list them on any website until she gets back to me. What I don't want to happen is for me to sell them and she comes back to me with someone who wants to go. Yes it's better to oversell than undersell though.

Georgiegirl256

Woolwich_Kim wrote: »

Once again, I would see it as her paying for MY ticket. My ticket is not her gift.

Doesn't matter, she still shouldn't have to pay for it. If a friend did this to me, they wouldn't be a friend for much longer, it's bang out of order IMO.

Angry_Bear

Woolwich_Kim wrote: »

Once again, I would see it as her paying for MY ticket. My ticket is not her gift.

So, just to clarify, if she had been able to go you would have expected her to pay for your ticket because that "is not her gift"?
Or you wouldn't have expetced that because it was your ticket, for you to attend. And now you want her to pay for a concert you no longer want to go to (regardless of the reason)?

I can't think of any reasonable interpretation where it is okay for you to expect your friend to pay for your ticket.

Pollycat

Woolwich_Kim wrote: »

It seems there are 3 choices if these tickets are not sold.

1. She pays me nothing and I resent her and our friendship may eventually finish because of it.

2. She pays me the full amount and resents me and our friendship may eventually finish because of it.

3. She pays me half/my ticket/her ticket. I treat what I've paid as a unwanted/useless gift, she treat what she's paid as compensation to me for her mistake. This may not be the ideal for both but this option is to meet halfway on this and move forward. We may still resent each other, but not as much as the first 2 options.

Now I'm not saying I will sever the friendship if she don't give me half the money (I think she will offer if she can't find a buyer) and the first 2 may not ever result in the ending of us being friends.

You come across as incredibly intransigent. :eek:

"compensation for her mistake"? Really?

I sort-of hope that she finds this thread and realises what your 'friendship' is actually worth.

fierystormcloud

catkins wrote: »

Not sure what sort of concerts you go to but £100 is fairly common now for tickets. Fleetwood Mac were than sort of price as were Paul Simon and Sting. Madonna is dearer.

I paid over that to see George Michael several years ago and would pay to see someone I really liked.

I would guess that the tickets are for Simply Red and, if so, should be fairly easy to sell.

I know that there are a few acts who charge exorbitant prices for concert tickets, but it's the exception rather than the rule, and it's simply untrue that £100 is a 'fairly common' price for concert tickets. I have been to about 30 concerts in the past 6/7 years; featuring all kinds of different bands and artists, and not one single one has cost more than £50. Even One Direction were only £37! Ellie Goulding was £49 and Ed Sheeran was £22. Even take That was only £38. The majority of the tickets were under £30.

You are talking to someone who goes to a LOT of concerts and who has lots of mates that do. So no point in trying to tell me £100 or more is a common price, because it isn't. The majority of bands and artists will be less than half of that. Some even a third.

jobbingmusician wrote: »

I think you should have a think about what you are actually annoyed about.

You're not annoyed about missing the concert, because you don't like the band anyway.

You're NOT actually annoyed about losing out financially, because many people on here have pointed out that if you make the effort to sell the tickets, you can recoup probably all the money. There is actually no way your friend is responsible for costing you £200 - you claim to be annoyed about losing money but you don't know how much you have lost until you have sold the tickets.

You are perfectly within your rights to be annoyed that your friend is disorganised (but surely you knew that before?) and that you have the hassle of selling the tickets. But neither of these are major things, and surely not worth losing a friendship over.

What are you ACTUALLY annoyed about? I suspect that either your friend really can't be bothered to maintain a friendship with you, in which case you are annoyed about that, or that you are winding yourself up because your friend is disorganised.

I am also beginning to wonder if the friend simply isn't bothered about the OP at all, and maybe this is why she has 'let her down...' Maybe she is trying to 'phase her out' and thinks this is a good way to do it. By the OP's conduct on this thread so far, if she is like this in real life, it wouldn't surprise me if this friend wanted to give her a wide berth.

Pollycat wrote: »

You asked for advice in your original post but it seems clear (at least to me) that you have no intention of taking any advice offered.

I think what you really wanted was for all (or at least the majority) of posters to agree that your friend should pay so you would feel justified in your way of thinking.
But it hasn't worked out that way but you are going on regardless.

Exactly. Why post for advice and then just go and do what the heck you want anyway. Daft.