Here we can all be heard for a little while

Waves_and_Smiles

You must be so angry and frustrated melly! I am so sorry.

Glad to help, Pyxis! My approach is a very therapeutic one which was used with me. A lot of people will justifiably walk away which is also a totally fair response. If you are going to invent scenario's then you have to accept that people won't trust you and likely not want to know you anymore when they find out. Having said that, you do then have a choice. I have found that when I am honest with people about the fact that I have lied in the past and explained why people do understand. Most people will be sympathetic to others who have lied as long as it was never to hurt anyone and there was a valid reason for it. I have a huge respect for people who admit to it because it leaves one feeling totally vulnerable. You just have to tell them the real truth, make sure you never do it again and accept that it will take a while to earn back trust.

mellymoo74

Utterly furious WaS my OH is an absolute mess. They know he's suicidal why in the hell would you do that to a suicidal man?
I have taken 2 tramadol hopefully be knocked out soon

Waves_and_Smiles

It is totally irresponsible Melly to ever do something like that to anyone who is vulnerable. I hope the Tramadol work and you can close your mind off for a while. You must have so many thoughts running through your head and just feel frantic.

Wellyboots6

I guess what you said WaS, is a few steps further along from where I got to with glossing over the story but still being there for the person. It's good you have so much insight in to why things happened the way they did etc, I know a lot of people would love to get to that point.

I know I'm supposed to rest Pyxis, but I can't! I feel so guilty. Which is why I ended up in such a mess with work I think, feeling guilty for not being able to keep up with everyone else.

I just did hubby a little BBQ which he seemed to enjoy. It was just lacking in burger buns slightly. Not sure where they went but I did find a lot of crumbs on the rug and Little Sod is being ever so loving...

mellymoo74

They have missed off at least one payment.

May have sent the world's snottiest email

elsien

Melly, not being in the situation, I can only guess how you're feeling and that probably doesn't even come close.
But can I suggest you take a step back for now - they're probably closed for the weekend anyway and don't hit the send on any snotty emails till you've had chance to calm down a bit. I get that you're fuming, and rightly so, but sending emails when you're angry can backfire a bit. Moral high ground and all that - let them show themselves up as a.holes and point out their errors without going over board. If you're looking like the reasonable one it'll stand you in good stead when proving what's happened to outsiders eg the court system.
That'd be my suggestion anyway. Then again, I'm not under the same stress as you are.

mellymoo74

Oh I just asked them to explain where the missing payment was elsien when they had picked up the one before and the one after.
I also suggested that they check both their motes and accounts before they serve notice twice on the same day to a man they know is vulnerable

elsien

Well I seriously hope someone manages to put a rocket up their jacksie on your behalf. They do seem to be behaving very unprofessionally.

And on an unrelated note, and with apologies to anyone abstaining or on a fast day,
I now declare it wine/chocolate/doggy cuddles o'clock.

mellymoo74

It solicitors time elsien last time they did this (exactly the same when I first raised it) I had MIL and OH and couldn't juggle that and fight to not get evicted I learnt from it though so
MP and Shelter involved instantly
All told they would do this
Then complaint in with ombudsman

Oh guess who after being mouse like for the last two weeks are now back to normal noise levels?
Anyone would think they knew the sound recording equipment was back at the HA as I dropped it off this aft....m

dragonette

Elsien you posted that as I also decided its alcohol o'clock!

Melly *growls at the HA* absolutely dire behaviour from them!

WaS thank you for sharing that, I'm going to have a think about what you said, to see if I have that tendency too. I can def think of one person who I know does this, unfortunately part of what they are focusing on atm is me; and its deeply unhealthy for both of us! In one way, you've relieved my guilt at the way I had to cut contact. In others, I feel even more sympathy for them (but not enough to continue to let them use me as an emotional punching bag).


I've been v quiet as I had my ESA tribunal (successful) and first appointment with the primary mental health team this week. The tribunal went well and I've been placed in the non-work related group. The appointment, well the very nice woman I spoke to said I was presenting a complex mental health picture alongside my physical conditions. This isn't hugely surprising to me, I just don't want them to think I'm making things up