Did you live with your husband/wife before marriage?

amistupid

Would you buy a car without a thorough test drive?

itsanne

!!!!!! wrote: »

Ah the 80s Threesome heaven :rotfl:

That made me laugh.

I'm astonished at your mum's attitude, Southernman.

We didn't 'officially' live together, but I was at uni and he had a house nearby - [STRIKE]no[/STRIKE] not many nights were spent in halls! It was probably as close to living together as it can be without actually doing so.

Would I change anything? Not particularly - we're still together forty years later. :eek:

missbiggles1

!!!!!! wrote: »

Ah the 80s Threesome heaven :rotfl:

Nothing so interesting!

System

First marriage, no I didn't live with him before we married.

Second marriage, yes we lived together for about 6 months before we got married.

I think more the key is how long you have been together as a couple. First marriage we were together 2 years before getting married. Second marriage 6 months.

marisco_2

Southernman wrote: »

Now as my boyfriend and I are looking to move in together, my mum is hesitant as I'm not engaged to him. I shouldn't just make it easy for him as he could get complacent.

Is that how you really think your boyfriend could respond to starting to share his life and a home with you? If so do the guy a favour and be totally honest with him about the lack of trust and confidence you have in him. He is about to make a big commitment to you and deserves to know your true feelings.

bylromarha

Got married in 1999 straight out of uni, aged 22.

OH and I still loving being together 16 years on. He had me in stitches earlier over something silly.

We had the fun of learning to live together after we got married.

Nailing my colours to the mast now - I think life is a great journey to go on together, and learning to live with the person you love is part of it. I think that the throw away attitude people have to everything in life these days has spilled over into our relationships. I know loads of people who drift in and out of living with people. I would hate to be that way. I'm glad OH and I had made a commitment to each other before moving in together.

We both knew the other was in it for the long haul rather than maybe having a "suck it and see" attitude <

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reference purely for ami's benefit ;-)

meritaten

I suggested living together when OH asked me to marry him - he refused and said marriage only. I was pregnant at the time and agreed to marry him. tbh, living together would have resulted in us splitting up. I still cannot decide if that was a right or wrong decision. if we hadn't married I wouldn't have had my lovely sons. This was back in 1977 - and OH was scared of his parents reaction - I couldn't have given a toss what parents thought.

itsanne

marisco wrote: »

Is that how you really think your boyfriend could respond to starting to share his life and a home with you? If so do the guy a favour and be totally honest with him about the lack of trust and confidence you have in him. He is about to make a big commitment to you and deserves to know your true feelings.

Isn't that how Southernman's mum views it?

missbiggles1

bylromarha wrote: »

Got married in 1999 straight out of uni, aged 22.

OH and I still loving being together 16 years on. He had me in stitches earlier over something silly.

We had the fun of learning to live together after we got married.

Nailing my colours to the mast now - I think life is a great journey to go on together, and learning to live with the person you love is part of it. I think that the throw away attitude people have to everything in life these days has spilled over into our relationships. I know loads of people who drift in and out of living with people. I would hate to be that way. I'm glad OH and I had made a commitment to each other before moving in together.

We both knew the other was in it for the long haul rather than maybe having a "suck it and see" attitude <

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reference purely for ami's benefit ;-)

For me, that's the difference between living together and being married - one's a commitment, the other isn't.

BWZN93

I only lived with my husband for two weeks in the UK before we flew out to Las Vegas and got married. We were engaged within 3 weeks of meeting too.