We all need to be heard for a little while.

Indie_Kid

Calley - it's nice to see you being more positive today.

Well, the two loads of washing have finally been sorted. Somehow, I've not ended up with any odd socks!

Errata

calleyw wrote: »

I will put my hand up to that. Its whats called Catastrophising.

I did a course about worry and anxiety and that was one thing they mentioned.

An example: When I text someone and they take for ever to reply I have all sorts going through my head. I think they hate me, don't care etc etc.

Yours

Calley

My stepdad catastrophised everything because it made him the centre of the family's attention. Not a good way to live a life as his kids gave him a wide berth.

Indie_Kid

calleyw wrote: »

I will put my hand up to that. Its whats called Catastrophising.

I did a course about worry and anxiety and that was one thing they mentioned.

An example: When I text someone and they take for ever to reply I have all sorts going through my head. I think they hate me, don't care etc etc.

Yours

Calley

I've tried to avoid doing this. I have a friend who sometimes takes his time replying to emails. When he does this, he apologises and tends to give a reason why. He didn't reply to one and I wondered whether it went through. We met up the next week and he said "I got your email. But I got a new laptop and Windows 8 is a pile of !!!!".:rotfl:

Georgiegirl256

Errata wrote: »

My stepdad catastrophised everything because it made him the centre of the family's attention. Not a good way to live a life as his kids gave him a wide berth.

This is very true. My Mam tends to do this, and my husband too to some extent. I find it very negative and it just sucks the joy out of things.

calleyw

Errata wrote: »

My stepdad catastrophised everything because it made him the centre of the family's attention. Not a good way to live a life as his kids gave him a wide berth.

No one knows I do it. So I don't do it to get attention.

Thats the sort of stuff that keeps me awake at night.

And did the other night.

Yours

Calley

purpleshoes_2

Sometimes you can't help catastrophising
I'm a natural worrier and the last 15 years or so for me mental heath wise have been tough.

Certainly not to get attention on my part. I live alone for a start.

The only person that any catastrophising affects is me.

And I have very much tried to avoid doing it lately as it doesn't help.

It's a habit you can break I think. But I completely understand why people do it.

purpleshoes_2

We are all made differently. And some folks can go through horrendous times and it has an impact on the way they view the world.

I worry about things, always will. But I explained before that people don't see that as I'm also naturally outgoing.

People are who they are. I'd love to be someone who for most things could have stuff happen to me and be like water off a ducks back.

But I'm not. However all I will say is that many people can be drama Queens and not catastrophise anything.

When I do worry about stuff it affects me and me only. I go out of my way not to let my worries impact on other people.

calleyw

purpleshoes wrote: »

Sometimes you can't help catastrophising
I'm a natural worrier and the last 15 years or so for me mental heath wise have been tough.

Certainly not to get attention on my part. I live alone for a start.

The only person that any catastrophising affects is me.

And I have very much tried to avoid doing it lately as it doesn't help.

It's a habit you can break I think. But I completely understand why people do it.

I have always been a worrier. I remember when I was living at home and about 17/18 yrs old and the phone went I was worried that I done something wrong that day and was going to get told off for something. I would rack my brains for what I had done that day to see what it could be.

I think the last 8 yrs or so have been really tough for me. With my husband having a stroke and I had to become the responsible adult and had to sort and do most things. As before I either got my husband to do it or he would help me.

Then I fell in love with someone who has bigger issues than me. And we use to feed off of each other and just make it worse and have huge arguments and I am very impulsive now would say I am on my way to talk about this rather than text. And would turn up on his door step!!!! Which did not help.

And now I am dealing with probably never seeing or hearing from him again. And I have constant reminders around me. Which does not help. And makes me feel I having my face rubbed in.

Its battle each day and I want to win the battle and the war!

Yours

Calley

System

calleyw wrote: »

Right afternoon my lovelies.

As you can see in a much better place today.

Even though I got up at 11am the first job of a the day was a walk. About 2.5-3 miles took me an hour and 15 mins. Never mind eh!

Got in 10 mins after that chucked it down. But I did go prepared with a brollie. Got in bunged a load of veg and a chicken breast in the steamer and went off and started to tidy my bed room.

25 mins later had my lunch but left most of it as felt sick and hungry at the same time. Left the washing up. I know.

Finished off my bed room and found a chunk out of the top of my bedside cabinet no idea how I did that. Decided not to buy or go to the library as I have so many books to read.

Going to sit down for a while and just veg.

And think about what I will this afternoon. Not sure read, x-stitch or watch a dvd or two that I have not seen before. Who knows the secret of the black magic box. Also only smarties have the answer :rotfl:

Yeah I know showing my age LOL!!!

Yours

Calley

Glad you're having a better day Calley You have done loads today! get you're feet up and have a cuppa!

I'm a natural born worrier. to the point i worry about things that haven't even happened yet! I must say Swain is being a very good influence on the worrying side. He is the most ridiculously chilled out, laid back person i have ever met. Nothing fazes him. He doesn't do stressed. :eek: And in some ways its rubbing off on me a bit. I'm worrying about less things and not getting quite as stressed. (Even if i did get to work today, see the massive queue and nearly have a panic attack )

purpleshoes_2

Ive always been a worrier but after more than a decade of work related nightmares, family bereavements and also dealing with some really horrible stuff that happened to a member of my family a few years back that very few people will go through in a lifetime, all I can say is, Id have to have been made of steel for it not to have an impact.

All I can say is, the 2 things that have worked for me when I start worrying are

1 whats the worst that can happen
2 if it does happen will I cope

That has really helped me along with going through some stuff that really was the worst that could ever happen to my family and we got through it, it made me realise that I have a lot of strength, we all have so I look back on that year and think, we went through so much pain and misery, Ive had enough of that

But I do understand why people get upset about stuff other people might let go in one ear and out the other. Its not always about being negative, we are just all different.

As I said before, Id love to be someone who cares about people but also doesnt let the small medium and large stuff affect them, but Im not.

Seriously, Id give anything not to be someone whose default setting was worry, because it just causes you no end of worry.

I have to say the older Ive got the less I worry, but about time really.