We all need to be heard for a little while.

Waves_and_Smiles

Oooh, could be mosquito's then! The itching is terrible! (Or it's Dracula).

Big hugs to you too, Gemini. You have had a lot to cope with in a short space of time, it's understandable that you would feel low. My moods tend to go up and down but I am probably not the best person to comment on fluctuating feelings because my imagination controls my emotions so much. I can imagine something sad and cry my eyes out and then imagine something happy and want to bounce with joy in a very short space of time. What has happened in reality often has little to do with it.

Solarjunkie

Pyxis and others in the same situation - does pretending to be ok help? Does it lift things a bit?

Pyxis

Yes, Geminilady, it can be very up and down, but the last few days have been much more down than up. Evenings are better, because I'm 'allowed' to not do anything in the evenings, but just relax. And I know I'll be going to sleep soon.

Yes, you have had a nasty combination of things happening, and now a life change situation is imminent, so yes, of course you feel carp, or even carper than usual! ((((((((((Geminilady)))))))))))))

Waking in the small hours is the pits. If that happens to me, I have to turn on the TV, to something innocuous, set the timer to turn itself off, and wait for the magic to work..........eventually it will bore me to sleep again.
Luckily, these days it doesn't happen much. I don't mind waking at 4am, but any earlier is horrid. The TV usually works, but very occasionally it doesn't........aargh! .......and it's usually when I have a busy day ahead, so,can't try and sleep during the day!


Yes, Solarjunkie! I pretend all the time when I'm out and about, or at a class or AmDram. Then I might feel better, but as soon as I don't need to pretend, wham, it's back.
I must say that things are particularly bad at the moment. At other times, the pretending can have a much longer lasting effect.
When I go down with these bugs, I have to miss classes and am at home much more, so that can set things off, as well as the fact that feeling physically ill is such a downer anyway!

Waves_and_Smiles

This is going to sound ridiculous but has anyone tried smiling and laughing? Just forcing yourself to do it? If I make myself smile I immediately feel better for as long as I am smiling. I can't remember fully why but there is a reason this works. It's something to do with the brain remembering that certain physical actions mean certain chemicals are released, so rather than happy chemicals causing you to smile, the act of smiling reminds the brain to release some. It sounds really silly but it does help me sometimes. Singing also does the same thing.

Pyxis

Yes WaS! The physical act of smiling, even a 'false' smile, has been shown to release endorphins and help to lift mood! That's why pretending to be happy often results in you eventually feeling happier!

I suppose that's why I gravitate to the sillier side of life!

As well as the old Readers' Digest adage of 'Laughter, the Best Medicine' being so true!

The horrid family things have, for me, overshadowed everything recently, though.

purpleshoes_2

Ive been quite even keeled emotions wise for quite some time, apart from two weekends ago, when I met my mum and cried (in public which I just don't do) and continued crying over the weekend.

Im not very good at forcing it, what I will say is that its probably one of these very cheesy things that lots of people say, but if I exercise, no matter how crap I feel going into a class, on the way out I feel great. Always felt like that, even 10 years ago or so when I used to do a lot of classes at the gym, if I walked in feeling meh, I always walked out feeling much much better and I do think this time round, the fact that Ive stuck to training for almost 2 years now, 4-5 days a week, has really helped my anxiety/depression/stress whatever it is you want to call it. Am saying that because I was never officially diagnosed with depression, I suffered from work related stress, but the symptoms and the way you view the world are very similar.

Boxing classes have been really good for me, not so much because you get to smack the pads, its not an aggression release for me as it might be for some people, I just really enjoy it.

In times gone by as soon as I felt crap Id just stop exercising and eat crap and everything would go to pot. I try to eat well, drink less alcohol and exercise.

The problem is sometimes when people feel low they don't have the oomph to exercise, have been there as well.

Waves_and_Smiles

Glad I wasn't going mad Pyxis and someone else knew about that, too! I actually notice a big difference in my mood within seconds if I force myself to smile, it doesn't matter if I am in the middle of crying my eyes out, it still works.

Exercise is another thing that releases happy chemicals, as I am sure you know Pauline. Plus there is the huge sense of achievement when you have done it. Before my arthritis became bad I used to go to the gym and always felt much better afterwards. Sadly, I can't do that now because even a personal instructor wouldn't give me a programme due to the amount of the bone degeneration so my muscles are extremely weak. Ironically, that makes arthritis worse because you don't have the muscles to support the bones so its a bit of a vicious circle. I do seem to have more energy after my daily physio though, when it eventually stops hurting.

purpleshoes_2

My cats make me laugh (and drive me round the bend every single day). One of my ginger toms sleeps with me (as my other ginger tom doesnt like him so they live in different areas of my flat). He likes to chew my hair, not just mine, anyones, never had a cat who likes to do that. Hes also really attached to me, about 6 months ago he realised that if he got under the covers he would be near me and nice and warm. I dont always sleep well but as bootcamp goes on Im out like a light sometimes so the other night I was asleep and I must have been in a deep one as I woke up on my back (always sleep on my side).

He was under the covers, in a ball, curled up with his eyes closed (which doesnt happen often as hes hyper). Another morning he was at my feet (hes never done this before) under the covers, fast asleep.

No matter what a rubbish day Ive had the fact that I get into bed and he wants to be beside me always makes me feel better. His aunty sleeps in my side of the flat too, but she sometimes goes in my spare room, sometimes curls up on a cushion (hes a bit of a rogue and they love one another and sometimes lie on the bed together, but at night he does his thing and she does hers).

Hes called beans, he's great.

purpleshoes_2

My other ginger tom did like him for 18 months and then decided that he didn't. Hes a placid old soul (my other ginger t). Would defend himself if anyone had a go (handbags at dawn usually), but so placid. Until he sets eyes on beans. Tried feliway, made nil difference.

One day I stupidly let him into my spare room and forgot beans was in there, just heard this howl, off they go into a ball, I had to pick my cat up by the back legs (and I would never do that), to get him away from beans.

Daft sods. He has no problem with any other, just beans, so it makes sense that beans is in with me and he's in with the cats he does like. Dont ask me what it was that set him off when he turned into the terminator, I really don't know, they lived in peace for 18 months and all of a sudden it was, I dont want YOU living here anymore.

My mum has a lovely chinchilla persian, was spoiled by his last owners so hes a bit of a rogue, lets say he knows his own mind. He rubs along with all of my mums cats apart from one, he also turns into the terminator around her, shes an old soul, 15 and just lives in my mums room (her choice, doesn't want to go out), but hes always trying to escape upstairs to try and bash her.

Funny really, to me cats are like little people, not cats if that make sense, they have their own personalities certainly.

Edited to add, Ive changed my avatar, thats a pic of beans and his aunty asleep on my pillow.

codemonkey

My happy song - I always end up giggling.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WlBiLNN1NhQ

Also, I've just seen a photo of a boy I was at school with. He was the boy that all the girls fancied so of course, he never noticed me. Now, let's just say he hasn't aged well. For some reason this makes me feel better.