Any Abuse Survivors on Here? Help Required Please

KARO

Can you afford a solicitor, or some form of legal advice? This will put your mind at rest that he will not be able to sue you, and they may also be able to advise you about possible options with regard to getting away from this person.

northerntwo1

He's not your father in this instance he's an abuser attempting intimidation to prevent being caught. My advice is what would you do if this wasn't your father but a stranger saying the same? No you can't be sued he's wanting to keep it quiet.

Gingernutty

He's scum and his threats are empty.

Any case for slander, malicious falsehood or libel does not attract legal aid, the onus [STRIKE]in[/STRIKE] is on the 'prosecutor' to prove the statements are false and lawyers would have to be paid up front.

Any lawsuit would fall at the first hurdle - there are too many witnesses against him.

You won't lose a thing.

Mojisola

bluelass wrote: »

Yesterday evening I had to come across the person who did this (and to my mum and brother too) I let slip I had been having counselling with a therapist and they have offered me hypnotherapy to help refresh my memories

If you know who the abuser is, why do you need to spend money on hypnotherapy?

Help to deal with the issues and to increase your self-esteem so that you can cut him out of your life would be very valuable but do you need to go over what happened?

shop-to-drop

I'm an adult survivor of childhood abuse from an older brother and currently being abused and intimidated by him since my mother died earlier this year. His behaviour after her death brought back memories for me and the abuse is now out in the open for the first time. He is trying everything he can to detract attention to me as an abuser, cheat and liar which couldn't be further from the truth.

Just want to add I don't feel I am in a position to offer advice but wanted to post so that you feel there is someone else in a similar position and maybe feel support from knowing that.

rogueylawyer

bluelass wrote: »

Thanks to all who support me its a relief to speak about it with neutral peeps. He says I can lose my home and savings if he sues me that's what I meant.

I'm so sorry you're going through this. It's a completely empty threat, made by a man who doesn't have to think about the consequences of his actions.

Do not worry about him (I know, I've been there and I appreciate how flippant it sounds, but really, do not give him any more space in your head or your life than you already have) You can say and do what you want, so long as you are not deliberately lying. On a completely practical note; unless he has categoric proof that he did not abuse you, and ridiculously deep pockets to spend on a solicitor and barrister and go to court, he's not going to sue you for anything and even more importantly, he's going to have difficulty winning. he would have to prove what you were saying was not true; how do you prove a negative?

Take care of yourself

marisco_2

How you react to your dads conduct and his inane ramblings is your choice. It is within your power to completely ignore him and disregard what he thinks and feels. You will not be sent to the clink, lose your savings, home or anything else simply for seeking help from a therapist. That he is running so scared of you speaking to someone about all you have suffered at his hands, speaks volumes about the enormity of the wrong he has done you.

Mojisola

marisco wrote: »

That he is running so scared of you speaking to someone about all you have suffered at his hands, speaks volumes about the enormity of the wrong he has done you.

This should be very empowering - he is frightened of you, bluelass!

Jojo_the_Tightfisted

Criminal proceedings will cost you nothing financially. The state pays for them because it's in the interests of justice.

bluelass

Mojisola wrote: »

If you know who the abuser is, why do you need to spend money on hypnotherapy?

Help to deal with the issues and to increase your self-esteem so that you can cut him out of your life would be very valuable but do you need to go over what happened?

Im notaying for hypnotherapy im a NHS patient, the therapist was recommended by my neurologist (I have epilepsy) as she knew my increasedfits were being caused by distress I was fast tracked to see the therapist and he wants to see if he can get me to remember early childhood events. The therapist says its possible I could remember events from 4 years old if successful I told him my so called dad was a cu** and he guessed right away after I said that.