Boyfriend disclosed he visited a prostitute in India one year before we got together

wiogs

DaveTheMus wrote: »

I've never purchased anything Apple because they are a disgusting company.

However I have purchased things that have been made in a sweatshop so I do have to bear responsibility for the terrible conditions these poor people suffer.

What I don't do is think that when I benefit from explotation it's ok but someone else benefits from it, it's bad...that would make me a hypocrite...

In what way?

j.e.j.

Confused5 wrote: »

No, sadly. I'll take some time off from this site as it's not helping me feel any better, I'm just getting angrier.

If you're an already-existing member of MSE using a new id you'll know what this board's like

But yes taking time off from the site is probably a good idea.

patanne

You need to forget about India, £1 and Apple and all the other irrelevancies to this. The main points here are that he has felt the need to pay for sex & will he feel the need to again & he has also felt the need to tell you about this (tell you not confess???). It is my understanding that most men prefer sex with a willing partner & I am not convinced that paying for it equates to a totally willing partner. Only you know him well enough to decide his motives for his decisions, to us he just is as you tell us (& the rest we feel free to make up).

Jojo_the_Tightfisted

marleyboy wrote: »

What if it didn't.

The trouble with narrow minded thinking, is those suffering from it, are obsessed in the "But what if" World. Which is generally always a far cry from the real World. Its why no court in the land would condemn a person based on a "But what if" scenario. .

If it didn't, then it's not anybody's business. But there are plenty of cases where people have contracted HIV, hep c, been beaten up, had children abused and the partners have history of doing it. Would they have gone ahead with the relationship if they'd known in advance? Some would, but not all.

This person not only ultimately endangered the OP's health (3rd world prostitution? How safe is that?), they are claiming it was the OP's fault, when they weren't even together.


Of course, that's if the somewhat familiar writing voice is genuine and isn't one of the usual bored storytellers we get on here.

squirrelchops

So what. You weren't together and he fid what he did. Hats off he told you as most men wouldn't have bothered!

Gavin83

Jojo_the_Tightfisted wrote: »

I agree that it's not my concern what a partner has done with previous consenting adult & equal partners - but if they've been abusive, taken risks with their sexual health or suchlike, mainlined class A drugs, screwed a 14 year old when they were 30, etc, then it is most definitely my business. And if whatever they have done has been painted as my fault because I hadn't done what they wanted? Absolutely, it's my business, so I know to get out now..

To be honest the thing I find most shocking about this whole situation is that he told her at all. You say it would be your business but I happen to think you'd never find out as 90% of men would never tell you.

I guess you just need to learn to be a good judge of character.

Bangton

In reference to the comments about the possible contracting of an sti from a 3rd world sex worker; surely, in any new relationship it is the responsibility of both parties to undertake sexual health checks before having sex. So suggesting he has put her at risk? No, she's put herself at risk if she has agreed to unprotected sex with someone who has had previous sexual partners.

I think it's irrelevant that he was chasing you for a LTR too. You weren't responding to his emails so can't expect him to keep himself free in case you're suddenly interested (which to me wouldn't be obvious in you being too busy to reply )

Jojo_the_Tightfisted

Gavin83 wrote: »

To be honest the thing I find most shocking about this whole situation is that he told her at all. You say it would be your business but I happen to think you'd never find out as 90% of men would never tell you.

I guess you just need to learn to be a good judge of character.

That's the thing - why would somebody tell it and make out it was their partner's fault because she wouldn't do what he wanted when they weren't even together - unless the revelation was designed to shock, upset, punish or control her in some way?

TBeckett100

i think this could go horribly wrong if they have children

Imagine the boyfriend putting £1 in the machine outside the supermarket for the kid to ride Dora the Explorer. Bound to bring back a few memories.

purpleshoes_2

Why would the op wait 3 weeks to start this thread and on Xmas day

Its got wind up written all over it.