Christmas festivities...

Pollycat

supermassive wrote: »

It's pretty questionable that she's asking us to go to her house in the morning anyway if she's just going to go out.

So why don't you question the arrangements?

Why didn't you ask what the plan for the day was before accepting the invitation?
I would at the very least be declining the invitation (demand?) to go there for breakfast.

Didn't your OH tell you what to expect?

It sounds bonkers.

TBagpuss

PS - what does your partner want? Does he *want* to have both breakfast and dinner at his mum's, or does he feel he ought to go?

If he wants to go, would it be possible for you both to go to your Mum's for presents, then for you to stay there while he goes to his Mum's for breakfast, and then you join him there for christmas dinner having spent the morning with your mum and other relations. You then both go on to your dad's.
That way, there is a lot less to-ing and fro-ing, you each get to spend time with each others familyies but to spend a boit longer with your own.

Regarding the 'tradition' - traditions change as families change. We used to have a tradition of all going to sit on my parents bed to open our stockings. Now that the youngest 'child' is over 30 and three of the 'children' are married/in relationships we don;t do that.
The current tradition is them that wants to go to church, and them that don't have a lie in then we all sit around (often with the lie-in crowd still in PJs) drinking mimosas while we open our stockings.

You and your partner could decide to start your own tradition.

Pollycat

TBagpuss wrote: »

If he wants to go, would it be possible for you both to go to your Mum's for presents, then for you to stay there while he goes to his Mum's for breakfast, and then you join him there for christmas dinner having spent the morning with your mum and other relations. You then both go on to your dad's.
That way, there is a lot less to-ing and fro-ing, you each get to spend time with each others familyies but to spend a boit longer with your own.

This sounds so much more sensible.

But I have a sneaky feeling that the OP is secretly happy with the plans and doesn't really want advice on how to simplify her arrangements.

maman

Pollycat wrote: »

This sounds so much more sensible.

But I have a sneaky feeling that the OP is secretly happy with the plans and doesn't really want advice on how to simplify her arrangements.

I'd agree. There's been a host of sensible advice and OP has been asked why she doesn't challenge the arrangements. I think maybe she's proud of attempting this marathon.

pickledonionspaceraider

This sounds like the most unbearable Christmas in history

Morglin

supermassive wrote: »

So I'm cooking for 12 people on Xmas eve, which is my dad's side, and then xmas day is my partner's family for dinner, and boxing day is spent with my mum.

Problem is, I need advice on what to do xmas day, because in the morning we'll go to my mum's for my 8 year old brother to open presents with my niece/nephew etc. Then after that it's time for breakfast at his mum's (apparently a 'tradition', but seems a waste of time if there's a big meal coming later), then back to my mum's as his mum's family goes to the pub (what on earth? erm..) and then on to my Dad's family who we'd seen the day before, for more niece/nephew presents, to see my grandmother, and my dad's family and kids etc. Then back to MIL for Xmas dinner, and back to my Dad's a few hours after that, to do the traditional "sat infront of an open fire getting steadily fatter and drunker watching home alone on TV and moaning about terrible xmas specials and how they're not as good as they used to be while some little scrubber steals all the caramel quality streets". I'm usually the culprit.

How would you advise - baring in mind all these other parts of the family have kids, which is why we're sticking to this crazy messed up timescale - in order to allow me to drink whiskey all day, because MIL is too much to bare? :rotfl:

Here's a simple list...

Xmas day:
Mum - 8 year old brother aka surrogate son & Niece & Nephew
MIL - Breakfast - 10 year old BIL & Grandparents
Mum - Baby brother, because.. it's xmas
Dad - 2 step brothers, step sister, step mother & Grandmother
MIL - Dinner
Dad - Endless supply of home made wine...
Bed - with food poisoning, probably.

What makes it worse is they all live opposite sides of town.

Is there a way to please everyone (they're demanding this schedule, and as we don't have kids - too many men in the relationship - we are obliged to stick to it)...

All I want is to have a morning whiskey. There's not many days you can do that!

Wow - you are making my Christmas look easy.....:beer:


Personally, I would pull a sickie with a few of these, and just do the ones you enjoy.....:eek:

Lin

Spendless

margaretclare wrote: »

'Tea' as a meal at 4 pm, I couldn't do it. People have different ideas about what they mean by 'tea'.

Tea, in this context meant a buffet. That's why I'd given no thought to being full after my turkey meal, I thought I could nibble on a sausage roll and a vol au vent and have more later (the food is never cleared until shortly before guests go home).As a child we had always finished our meal before the Queens speech came on at 3pm (just the way it worked out) so I never considered it would be finish one meal and start the next.

OP- Any nearer to deciding what you are doing.

Brighton_belle

supermassive wrote: »

.

Is there a way to please everyone (they're demanding this schedule, and as we don't have kids - too many men in the relationship - we are obliged to stick to it)...

Pollycat wrote: »

But I have a sneaky feeling that the OP is secretly happy with the plans and doesn't really want advice on how to simplify her arrangements.

I think the OP is male.

Buzzybee90

maman wrote: »

I'd agree. There's been a host of sensible advice and OP has been asked why she doesn't challenge the arrangements. I think maybe she's proud of attempting this marathon.

OP is a he.

gettingtheresometime

The more I read these threads the more I appreciate my mum and, when they were alive, my parents in law