my husband is having an affair

Morglin

Get a solicitor - virtually the same thing happened to a friend of mine, after 10 years of marriage, and he was, by virtue of marriage, entitled to money from what the court decided was 'his share' of the house (paid for before they even met).:eek:

She had to downsize to pay him off, so get some proper advice.

Good luck.

Lin

Guest101

Angry_Bear wrote: »

I agree with almost everything you've said on this thread, but this is ridiculous! There's nothing wrong with being a feminist, and it's not the same a being a misandrist. Feminism is about equality and the people on this thread claiming the OP can keep all marital assets are definitley NOT doing this because of feminism. Stop confusing the issue.

This however, is excellent advice.

Please note the ' ' around feminist. I was saying exactly as u are. These are not feminist comments, as they do not preach equality. Perhaps I used the word without giving extra content, but certainly I wasn't disparaging equal rights. Apologies if it offended u

SailorSam

I've not read the whole thread yet but someone at the begining suggested you should try to download it's history. If it's not to late from yesterday, if you can't do that perhaps you should stash the phone somewhere and keep it, he'll think he's lost it but you'll have all your evidence.
(( hugs ))

Guest101

SailorSam wrote: »

I've not read the whole thread yet but someone at the begining suggested you should try to download it's history. If it's not to late from yesterday, if you can't do that perhaps you should stash the phone somewhere and keep it, he'll think he's lost it but you'll have all your evidence.
(( hugs ))

More advice to break the law, google misuse of computers act 1990...

FatVonD

Just to add some balance, I was married for 13 years and, though he didn't ask for any of my house, I spoke to my next door neighbour who was a lawyer just in case he did who told me he didn't stand a cat in hell's chance of getting anything as he'd contributed nothing, the equity had been accrued by me over many years before I met him and I had a young child.

mogwai

I have no knowledge of divorce law but for some reason I thought that if a spouse is proven to be cheating, that can affect the division of assets in a divorce.. Anyone know this to be true?

Pollycat

mogwai wrote: »

I have no knowledge of divorce law but for some reason I thought that if a spouse is proven to be cheating, that can affect the division of assets in a divorce.. Anyone know this to be true?

I doubt it very much.

thorsoak

mogwai wrote: »

I have no knowledge of divorce law but for some reason I thought that if a spouse is proven to be cheating, that can affect the division of assets in a divorce.. Anyone know this to be true?

May be so in some parts of the world, but in England & Wales - no.

Guest101

FatVonD wrote: »

Just to add some balance, I was married for 13 years and, though he didn't ask for any of my house, I spoke to my next door neighbour who was a lawyer just in case he did who told me he didn't stand a cat in hell's chance of getting anything as he'd contributed nothing, the equity had been accrued by me over many years before I met him and I had a young child.

Can u name, just so I know which ones to avoid... U were lucky, congrats

paddyrg

Horrible situation for you If your husband has been hiding a mistress from you for so many years, after promising not to, he's not fully invested in your relationship.

Couple of ideas of varying worth -
1) Go to a 'sick friend' for a few days and get your world in order after the shock, gives you a chance to take legal advice, etc.
2) You have his phone - you may be able to enable/install location tracking if you're feeling a bit techie or have a friend who might be able to help - then you could see if he goes round to her place whilst you're away per 1)
3) If he does, that might be a good time to pop back and put his stuff in bin bags - to leave outside her place for when he comes out afterwards.
4) The other woman - for all her part in this, she's not the one who's wronged you, he has. She may have poor judgement, but her choices aren't about you. Be really clear attributing blame.
5) if you don't turn on location tracking on the phone, maybe just leave it at your sister's place and play dumb when he can't find it. He'll think he's left it in the car/lost it in the house - may as well enjoy him going frantic.