How often do you see your (adult) children when they're not living with you?

[Deleted User]

noelphobic wrote: »

Very strange indeed! Did they not even all get together when he visited?

No, he just used to visit one after the other. When my uncle died his body wasn't discovered for months.

bambinaUK

I see my mum every Sunday.
My daughter is now at Uni and I go up and see her every 6 weeks or so. We also text or chat on the phone most evenings.

My son (26) appears once in a blue moon, despite being just 5 minutes drive away.

I used to see a lot of my in-laws when the children were little, but now it is just at family gatherings.

heartbreak_star

I live 12-15 miles away from Mum and see her once a week-ish, sadly Dad is no longer with us.

EDIT: GoogleMaps says it's actually 20 miles!

HBS x

noelphobic

Person_one wrote: »

I live about 12 miles from my parents (had to check on google maps!) and I usually go about once a month on average, sometimes more sometimes less. I work shifts and so does one parent so it depends on when our weekends off line up and what's going on with other members of the family. They hardly ever come to see me unless they're in the city for another reason, but that's because their house is kind of the 'family gathering spot' for everybody to meet up so I don't mind that.

Why do you ask OP? Are you a parent or an adult child?

I have a 26 year old son who currently lives 3 or 4 miles away. We both live very close to train stations and the trains run every 15 minutes, taking around 15 minutes for the journey.

I have a car and usually take him home when he visits. He has been visiting once a week on average since he last moved out. He has now said this is very 'manufactured' and he would like to see me less often and spend quality time together doing 'stuff'.

I'm very hurt by this as I live alone and brought him up alone from when he was a few months old.

noelphobic

jack_pott wrote: »

No, he just used to visit one after the other. When my uncle died his body wasn't discovered for months.

that's really sad.

AnnieO1234

When we live ten minutes away I'd see my mom (dad at work) twice a week and usually my dad once a fortnight. My MIL also was close by and we would see her once a week maybe once a fortnight depending on time commitments. FIL lives approx 1.5 hours away and aside from occasions like funerals and parties (DH and FIL extended side of family are local to our home town) we would only see maybe twice a year.

Then we moved thirty or so minutes away, and I get blessed weeks to my complete self. It does help my dad retired around same time so my parents are more likely to be out of the house going places now x

lilmissreading

noelphobic wrote: »

I have a 26 year old son who currently lives 3 or 4 miles away. We both live very close to train stations and the trains run every 15 minutes, taking around 15 minutes for the journey.

I have a car and usually take him home when he visits. He has been visiting once a week on average since he last moved out. He has now said this is very 'manufactured' and he would like to see me less often and spend quality time together doing 'stuff'.

I'm very hurt by this as I live alone and brought him up alone from when he was a few months old.

Ah, OP, maybe he just means that you have both got in a rut and not appreciating time together and that if you planned to do things together, you could both appreciate that time more?

Obs, don't know what you usually do, but if it always at home maybe he means the odd night out for a meal or drink? A walk on a Sunday? A trip to the cinema or theatre? Renting/recording a programme you both enjoy? Me and my dad usually have frantic phone/email conversations about Strictly come dancing and try to watch the final together with a takeaway of m&s special, if not watch the christmas special together. My brother, DH and i all try to watch Dr Who together. Not exciting but it's one of the shared experiences for us. Go figure!

Maybe he hasn't realised how much you enjoy the time together. In my early pg my mother came over just to watch TV in the same room as me as I had gone all hermit like with fatigue and sickness. I really didn't understand this but she explained it meant a lot to her as otherwise she felt pushed out even though it was the pg symptoms not her or me.

SanguineSteve

I'm 32, live about 6 miles from my folks.

I'd say i see them about once a week on average. Some weeks more, sometimes not for a several weeks.

tea_lover

I see my parents at least once a week, same with my sister and niece. We all live within a mile of each other. We all go together to see my grandad a couple of times a week too.

I text my dad, sister and niece most days (my mum hasn't got a phone).

We all went on holiday for a week in August - loved it

We see OH's mum every couple of weeks (she lives about 10 miles away).

cazziebo

jack_pott wrote: »

My father's siblings used to live in adjacent streets to each other, whilst my father lived 200 miles away. When he went home to see them they used to ask after each other, having not seen the others since his last visit.

I'm one of five siblings and we have never all been in the same room together. My older brother went to live with grandparents as a teenager, joined the merchant navy at 17 and was away when my youngest brother was born. He then emigrated to Canada, with my older sister following a few years later. We've almost managed a reunion a few times but there was always one of us that couldn't make it.