Spent 4 years pretending it's all OK

grannyx2

Saw this today and thought of you x



Granny x

NoOneAround

grannyx2 wrote: »

Just popping in to say hope today goes as well as these things can and isn't too awful. Glad you've got DD with you for support. X

Also want to agree with Mr B's comment re predators. Write to them all again with I&E form and letter explaining why you can't afford to pay them x. Tell them you can only afford y. Explain that this is likely to be a long term situation and ask them to contact you in writing only. Most of mine accepted this for 6-12 months and only after this time would they write to me again for a review. At each review I'd simply update my I&E form, tell them I couldn't increase the payment as my situation hadn't changed and ask them to renew the agreement. I Had no phone contact with any of them until I tried to do the F&Fs this year.

I'd be wary of telling them the situation may improve in the future as then they expect more. Better to deal with any increases in income at review time, after properly assessing that your I&E is working. No problem with actually not telling them about any increases if it actually gives you a chance to live slightly better or create an emergency fund. It may even give you a chance to save towards future F&Fs.

I hope this makes sense. It will all calm down eventually and when it does you won't know yourself.

Hugs honey, thinking of you today x

Granny Thank you for your kind words...Friday was an awful day and the weather reflected how everyone felt - it was grey and dismal, cold persistent heavy rain. It helped having DD there - she went to pieces when she saw friends children, she has known them all her life, and although I was really upset I then had to comfort and help her so it gave me something else to focus on. My friend was so brave, she packed a lot into the last 8-9 years - she was only given 3 years when first had BC but responded really well to a new drug. In lungs 15 months ago, then brain so went downhill very quickly in last 2 weeks. The family have a tough few weeks ahead - Christmas and both children's birthdays in January.


All your (and Brogden's! advice) gratefully accepted and notes taken - I think will just have to say things haven't picked hoped, as I said find it really stressful living week to week so will be nice to have six months bills worth of buffer. I think I will continue to self manage , now that I can talk about it without falling crying and feeling like a failure!


Hugs
XX
NOA

NoOneAround

grannyx2 wrote: »

Saw this today and thought of you x



Granny x

:rotfl::rotfl:Granny you sneaked in and posted this while I was typing my reply to you! Love it ....nearly dropped my laptop I laughed so much!
Hope all OK at you end ...
xx NOAh will pop by xxHugs

NoOneAround

Brogden wrote: »

Haha :rotfl:!! Don't say it to your DH, say it to the predators silly x

Don't use the term 'token payments' because you're through all of that. If they think these are 'token payments' they are impatient for more and are rubbing their hands with glee at the prospect of you delivering huge sacks of cash to them in the near future on an alarmingly regular basis !!

I am so happy things are going well for you but so you can concentrate on your work and pleasures I would contact them all again - send the I&E again - tell them nothing has changed and throw in a couple of additional problems, stir a little worry and doubt into the mix and say you just cannot foresee being in the position to increase your monthly payments in the near future, requesting a long term payment plan of £X. It WILL be accepted if the I&E backs it up. The word 'token' is banned remember !! They will not contact you then for 6 months and I'll bet you can agree 12 months with some?

You can have much more peace than you are having. If I hadn't done this Mrs B would have crucified me on the tree in the garden a long time ago !

Have a lovely day NOA

Brogden x

Hey Brogden ...Thank you - glad Mrs B hasn't crucified you in the garden...who else would call me sweetie and cheer me up even though I use all the wrong words ...(Got it .....word token is banned).......
xxNOA

NoOneAround

grannyx2 wrote: »

Saw this today and thought of you x



Granny x

So Granny, I am reading this picture as "NOAh sails off into the sunset with family and friends while predators missed the boat and left high and dry....they were so embarrassed about it they drew a line under it and made themselves extinct. The end. "


XX NOAh

grannyx2

^^ exactly x

NoOneAround

Morning everyone!
Having a lazy sit in ...in bed with laptop...
DS still asleep, finally settled after night full of coughing fits..think might need to make drs apt today and check its not a chest infection. Luckily am not out for work this week. Poor little (big) thing ...can't remember a time he has had 3 days off school - he's normally so stoic.
Shouldn't be so lazy ...I should try and get ahead as am working most of Saturday - at school in the morning for scholarship testing then at a PreSchool Christmas fair with my direct sales books Usbo*ne which I love doing but never make much money on. They have asked me back every year for about 7 years so I just go to help them fundraise. DH things its a waste of time but I love books and I treat it like an afternoon out - little kids all excited to see one of the Dads's dressed up as santa, mince pies and cake, fancy dress comp...miss all of that as my two have got older...I'm a big kid at heart really:D


NOA
xx

Puzzcat

Hi Noah,


I do miss the days of christmas fairs as well, although to be honest I did go with my neighbour and her children a few years back and it was in some smelly church hall with basic tins of food on the bottle stall...so that's my last memory of them...!!


I have brought you a it is fully decorated and loaded with presents so saves you a job... (if only...)..


I used to have a company car and never realised how much tax (well I was only 21...) it cost me..! I had them for 15 years and then discovered how much I prefered driving an old banger and keeping all my money...!! I'm sure your OH will pick the best job for him and at least if he makes the sole decision its his fault if he chooses wrong... !!


Glad friday went ok, well as well as they can.. and hope you enjoyed having dd back.. won't be long until she's back for christmas I imagine...!!! We haven't seen hide nor hair of my stepson since summer.. He loves uni life... a little too much maybe...!!!


Catch up soon and take care of you.


Puzz. xx

NoOneAround

Lying in bed listening to DS still coughing away - this is the first time ever he has been off school this long - went to Drs yesterday but they said chest sounded clear so no antibiotics despite green stuff being coughed up. Looks like he wont be in school tomorrow either.Have been taking high dose of Vit -can't afford to catch what he's got!


Did not get much done today, so annoyed with myself DD birthday tomorrow and it will be the first time ever that I won't see her on her birthday, as she was home for 4 days last weekend. Feels very strange


Sorted out some of DS Christmas present today - he found some games he wanted -package £80 down to £20 today -Black Friday deals - so he was jumping up and down all excited - Bought it and he downloaded - also saving on wrapping paper;)
DH is in demand - he now has a third job offer in the pipeline. He's been worried all summer that at his age 55 - ageism would creep in - but quite the opposite - in his field there is a real shortage of experienced people! He has been so much more positive :T...likely to take the one nearest ,,,decision by Monday -


Off to beddy byes
sweet dreams XX
NOA

Verbatim

Fabulous news re OH's THREE job offers. Wonderful for confidence boost. I think you have handled the last three months brilliantly! Very stoically too.
I hope that this is the beginning of the upturn for your lovely family.
V