Return to Solvency

grannyx2

Ok so I have finally plucked up the courage to start my diary. It's a really good way of recording the events that take place in my effort to finally become debt free after years of struggling and robbing Peter to pay Paul.

I had a mini LBM in 2007 following some traumatic life events and plucked up the courage to inform my oblivious OH about the trouble I was in. TBH I thought he would leave me as our relationship was and still is pretty rocky but he was surprisingly supportive. However, I did not tell him the extent of our debt, which at the time amounted to in excess of £110k. :eek:

With equity in our house we took out a secured loan for the maximum they would lend and were left with approx £45k of debt. This seemed like a better alternative to a DMP as my job is in danger if my insolvency gets discovered. :shhh:

However, I did not think things through properly, truly believing stupidly that a shopaholic could become a complete non-spender overnight. Not on your nellie.

So we advance to July 2011 and LBM number 2. Realising after 4 years of struggling, things were rapidly getting worse, I wrote to all our creditors and offered them a reduced monthly repayment. It was a hard struggle to begin with, with the debts initially going up instead of down, whilst they placed charges and interest on the debts when I failed to pay them the minimum balances. :mad:

However, eventually I got all bar one to agree to freeze interest and charges and all to accept my reduced payments, to be reviewed in January. I worked out yesterday that I will be debt free in 2024, which although scary is sooner than I ever thought would happen. I'm also fairly determined to make it happen sooner than that and am sure I will succeed. :idea:

grannyx2

So as I continue down this long and tedious road, I hope I will pick up some friends along the way.

I can't write a really diary, in fear of my OH discovering it. I know its awful that I'm still hiding things from him but I'm trying to keep us together and know that this would be the final straw. he's pretty insensitive at times and although he has benefited from my overspends, he has absolutely no understanding as to how I ended up in a financial mess.

I feel the need to write this diary as I'm trying to cope with this on my own and have things I need to get off my chest now and again and can't talk to him about them.

The most recent event was when MB£A, who had accepted my low repayment offer and froze interest transferred my debt to a DCA. They wrote to me informing me that they wanted £3949 immediately and kindly provided me with their website details so I could pay them in full. "Whistle dixie if you want but you can't have what I ain't got"

Anyway, MB£A had told me not to worry about this as they would forward all my correspondence to the DCA. Ha, oh no they didn't.

So I rang the DCA, one off chat, follow up correspondence to be in writing only and tried to explain my situation. Ha, stupid "Emanuel did not want to hear my tales of woe and was not the least interested to hear of my drop in household income, he just wanted my money.

Explaining that no action would be taken and all charges and interest were frozen, he seemed to think he was being kind when he told me I had some time to evaluate my situation to come up with the money - in a whole 3 weeks. Oh, how so very kind of you, I uttered, I will go and find that spare cash that has been invisibly floating around my house over the last year unbeknownst to me and post it to you tout de suite. Stupid man, I went off in a tirade of words, explaining my situation in words of one syllable as the poor man seemed to have understanding difficulties. His response at the end? Put it in writing - DONE so I await with baited breathe for the next installment of what I believe will be a rocky relationship.

Next please :mad:

BFN - me and anyone else who may join me.

I'm living the life of the Bruno Mars Lazy song today :beer:

grannyx2

Just had some really good news pop up in my inbox. Instead of an Easter Egg this year I got my OH to buy me some skincare products that I fancied. He paid £10 to get 3 items on 3 for 2 with 3 x £5 vouchers in them, so really free.

However when I looked at the vouchers they had expired a month before. :mad:

Now before this month I would have been cross and thrown them away.

However, I decided to chance my luck and complain to the well known chemist, not really expecting much from them at all. Well, today I have had an email off them confirming they have credited the relevant value, in points, to my points card. :T

So happy as this will help to buy DD a birthday pressie for her up and coming special birthday. I would have had to use the vouchers separately and on only one brand of skincare. Now I get to use the points in one go and anywhere in the store. :j

Yey me. Off to read some more DFD to gather some more hints and tips on my journey to good financial health

gargrave50

Nice to see you started a diary, I've subscribed.

Great things come from little starts.

grannyx2

Hi G so nice of you to join me. Had my first recorded NSD today, although a bit of a cheat as I didn't go out. However, pre LBM I didn't need to go out to spend as that's what the internet is for isn't it? :j

Anyway, had a fairly lazy day after spending the night lurking around other MSE'ers diaries until the ungodly hours, so it was probably quite easy not to spend. Planning another one tomorrow despite having my DGDs over to play.

Planned to list on ebay for the first time today but didn't get around to it. Will sort the stuff out and take the photos and write the descriptions, ready for the next free/low listing day. :idea:

Hope you've had a good productive weekend with your family. When are you off back to London?

BFN, join me again soon Gx2 x

oo just realised I've gained my 1st star and am not a newbie any more - Yey go me

chevalier

Welcome to the boards. Good luck on your journey. Would it help you to fill in this statement of affairs calculator so that you know you have budgeted for everything?

http://www.makesenseofcards.com/soacalc.html

We also might be able to make suggestions of where you can make some more savings, so you have more to throw at the debt.
chev

grannyx2

Thanx for the tip Chev. I'd seen the SOA calculator but its a bit difficult for me to change much in my expenses at the moment as OH is not dealing with this matter very well and is still pretty oblivious to our situation. Despite my trying to raise it with him.

I've been very MSE over the last year, getting the best deals we can for all our essential bills. The money I've saved goes in my terra mundi to be put towards a F&F when full. The only way I'm going to have more to throw at our debts is to make a little extra income rather than cutting back our expenses. I have a couple of ideas and have also told my OH that I will not be paying for any treats like holidays or meals out, so if he wants to keep up with these activities then he has to pay for them.

I don't control the food shopping budget as my OH does most of the cooking, he's a bit of a control freak and likes his kitchen to himself - fine by me I hasten to add. He pays it out of his income anyway, which is pretty good at the moment cos he's had a bit of overtime lately but to be fair he is pretty good at the shop anyway so probably spends less than I would if I took charge of it. As said in my earlier post, unfortunately he considers this financial mess to be my problem and is being un-supportive about it tbh. With our marriage so rocky I haven't got the energy or inclination to kick up a fuss and as long as my creditors continue to play fair I'll get there slowly but surely on my own and feel proud with myself for doing so

BFN Gx2

I've done a SOA for my creditors and touch wood it seems to be working at the mo.

gargrave50

Hey Gx2

I know you say you have already cut back on the expenses you can, but posting an SOA is still a good idea. You would be surprised at what others pick out. I had already cut back when I did mine, but the tips from others still gave me extra ways to cut back .

Go on, you know you want to:rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:.

Seriously though, lots of people are reluctant to put it down on paper for a few reasons

1. fear of being rumbled
2. fear of seeing what it looks like

All I'm saying is take a deep breath and have a think about it at least xx

grannyx2

OK another morning in and I have to admit that my new obsession is DFDs on MSE. A much better use of my time than FB games I hasten to add.

Planning a productive day, writing that letter to the creditor "halif*x" who have refused to stop interest and is the only one not to show as defaulted on my noodle account, despite my being about £2000 behind on payments. :mad:

!!!!!! don't they realise I want them to default as the sooner they do, the quicker they will disappear off my file. :wall:

Anyway I fought M/S re a restructuring loan and finally got them to agree to no charges/interest and low payments for a year, so now hoping Halif*x will do the same. :idea:

Managed to get a better deal on our Home insurance yesterday, halved the premium and the saving is going in my F&F savings to make an offer to someone later this year.

DGD2 is coming over at 12 and then we'll pick DGD1 up from school at 3 and have some Quality Granny time. :kisses:

BFN til later Gx2 x

grannyx2

gargrave50 wrote: »

Hey Gx2

I know you say you have already cut back on the expenses you can, but posting an SOA is still a good idea. You would be surprised at what others pick out. I had already cut back when I did mine, but the tips from others still gave me extra ways to cut back .

Go on, you know you want to:rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:.

All I'm saying is take a deep breath and have a think about it at least xx

Thanx for the advice re SOA and I promise to think about it.

However is a bit difficult to cut back much more than I have as those things that are higher than they should be are controlled by OH and he just doesn't seem to want to be involved in any of this. :wall:

He is like an ostrich, burying his head in the sand (where is the icon for that, I want one) and still wants his holidays and other treats. Difficult for me to stop him as they come out of his o/t. We've never had a joint account and he considers his o/t as his to do what he wants with. He pays his share of the bills though so musn't grumble really.

grannyx2

Well letter done and another NSD under my belt today. Hoping to have another one tomorrow as I haven't got much money in my purse until the end of the month, so the more NSDs I have this month the better. Have to get up early in the morning to wash my hair and then make my lunch for work, as didn't make it today. Busy busy Granny with my 2 little darlings all afternoon. :kisses:

Made my new great nephew 2 cardigans today and finished off the ones I made for my 2 DGDs. Only cost me £6 for the 4 and that includes the buttons, so very MSE. :money:

Really pleased with them all, especially 1 of the 1s for new GN :j

Now making hot pink one for DGD1, colour was her choice and should have enough wool left over to do 1 for DGD2 too. I find knitting very therapeutic and love seeing the end results.

Anyway, off to work tomorrow, long day planned so an early night is on the cards for me tonight.

BFN Gx2 x