Is it unreasonable to expect someone to turn up on time?

dandelionclock30

http://www.evanscycles.com/.
Evans cycles have got their sale on at the moment and you could get a road bike cheaper than it usually is. Just get one and say to the man that your wanting to make your own way there.
That way you wont be dependant on him and you'll have only yourself to blame if you are late.

anotheruser

lostinrates wrote: »

Its frustrating...

Just like when people don't use apostrophes... :P

iammumtoone

Brighton_belle wrote: »

I know people have reacted to the coach telling him what to do, but there is a chance it isn't quite as bad as it seems:
My memory tells me Indie Kid has Asperger's, and I've a vague feeling the running club may have a number of members with such issues: it my be the person giving the lift lacks social awareness/organisation skills and it's part of the coaches job to help him navigate life by going through what time he would need to leave to get to a certain place on time.
If it is the same guy as last year, I recall he had dyslexia, and that can mean he has great difficulty in organising his life.
So it may be a case of a man who finds organisation really difficult, giving a lift to someone for whom preciseness is critical and who also lacks the empathy to appreciate a) someone is doing them a favour and b) it's quite difficult for them.

.

That puts a different spin on things. I now think the coach has to take some responsibility for this, as a coach I assume he/she is trained in the needs of their members.

Pairing a person who has trouble with organisation with someone who has a need for routine and need for when they are told something for it to happen exactly that way is not a good mix!

BigAunty

I have known 2 people with absolutely diabolical punctuality and they don't always even bother to offer half-baked excuses, they can react quite aggressively when challenged, so they actually don't think it is rude to be late (including to time sensitive occasions like a birthday meal where they will waft in an hour or so late) but actually think it is rude to be expected to arrive on time...

Pollycat

iammumtoone wrote: »

That puts a different spin on things. I now think the coach has to take some responsibility for this, as a coach I assume he/she is trained in the needs of their members.

Pairing a person who has trouble with organisation with someone who has a need for routine and need for when they are told something for it to happen exactly that way is not a good mix!

It could quite well put a different spin on the situation.

It would have been helpful for the OP to include relevant details in her initial or subsequent posts.

She's not even said if there is any money involved in this lift arrangement that appears to have been arranged by a running coach.

From some of the earlier replies it also appears that there may be some history between the OP and the person giving her a lift.

Brighton_belle

iammumtoone wrote: »

That puts a different spin on things.

Well I might not be right! It's just a possible alternative spin...

ciderwithrosie_2

missbiggles1 wrote: »

Hopefully, when you're older, time will be less rushed.

I don't know anybody who would treat a social arrangement this specifically, everybody I know arranges things on the basis of "see you around midday" rather than expecting anybody to be there on the dot. Our working lives are or were ruled by the clock so we don't want to carry this over into our social lives.

But how do you know what time to be ready for if there's no firm arrival/meet/pickup time? If I can get home from work at 5.30 and be showered, made up, hair done and dressed before 7pm then why can't everyone else. I know roughly how long each activity will take me and plan accordingly


I hate sitting around all ready to go waiting for other people or a taxi. However, it's just as rude to not be ready when people call for you. I try not to do either.


In my experience, the serial latecomers are people who get easily distracted and have trouble managing their time effectively, it's not necessarily because they think their time is more important than yours.

jaylee3

ciderwithrosie wrote: »

But how do you know what time to be ready for if there's no firm arrival/meet/pickup time? If I can get home from work at 5.30 and be showered, made up, hair done and dressed before 7pm then why can't everyone else. I know roughly how long each activity will take me and plan accordingly

I hate sitting around all ready to go waiting for other people or a taxi. However, it's just as rude to not be ready when people call for you. I try not to do either.

That says exactly how I feel TBH. ^^^ :T

BigAunty

ciderwithrosie wrote: »

In my experience, the serial latecomers are people who get easily distracted and have trouble managing their time effectively, it's not necessarily because they think their time is more important than yours.

I'd agree with you about the lack of general organisation and planning skills that come with the most obvious symptom of being unpunctual.

But I do wonder also if there isn't an attitude underpinning it that they are entitled to swan in as and when, that other people's expectations are tedious.

The 2 people I cited as habitually unpunctual includes a relative that never sends birthday or xmas cards or buys gifts and a friend that can't manage her money and is always last to the bar. They have a span of selfish, self absorbed behaviour.

DUTR

missbiggles1 wrote: »

Hopefully, when you're older, time will be less rushed.

I don't know anybody who would treat a social arrangement this specifically, everybody I know arranges things on the basis of "see you around midday" rather than expecting anybody to be there on the dot. Our working lives are or were ruled by the clock so we don't want to carry this over into our social lives.

Agreed. And it's one of the things I picked up from a time management session.
One is either on time or late, so the rushing to work say, is when accidents can and do occur.