End of relationship

vodkachick68

mose wrote: »

I know how you are feeling right now, I'm currently going through the early stages of divorce, my wife of 8 years(10 together) had an affair and is divorcing me. The pain is truly unbelievable. I feel sick to my stomach every minute of the day. We have 2 little kids and the thought of them not having a mummy and daddy together breaks my heart. Let's hope that time is a healer cause right now my whole world has been turned upside down. So you're not alone out there in your hurt.

Sorry to hear that your also going through the same heartache as me. I haven't been able to eat properly and feel knackered with the stress of it all. I must admit I do feel slightly better but it's on my mind most of the time. I ask myself why and could I have done anything to prevent it. I can relate to everything you have said and as people say time is a healer,all I can say is it better hurry up as I'm finding it hard to move on.

Try to keep busy and it helps to talk to friends if that's possible for you. I found my friends have been fantastic I wish you all the luck for the future and I know things will get better for you

vodkachick68

Hi well i saw him out with his new floozie last night and I feel like I have regressed back to square one! Sounds silly but she is so rough,got tattoos down her arm and looks very gaunt as she is in to all this exercise and running lark. Completly not his type at all!! They were all lovey dovey,how the hell could he do that infront of me grrr!!!

I know I need to move on now but boy I'm finding this tough,it's still so raw and I don't feel I'm ever gonna get over this

74jax

May be she is so different to you, and that's what he finds interesting. If she is not his type may be that is the attraction . Imagine if she was just like you, you'd be thinking why not still be with me.

Plus it didn't work out with you, so it makes sense he goes for someone 'different'. s

At least that is out of the way now tho, you can start slowly to move on, one day at a time. You don't need to look any further than current day and what you are doing to get through the day.

Pollycat

That was always going to be the toughest test, vodkachick68 - seeing them together.

But you have seen them together now so the only way is up.

As for being 'lovey-dovey', maybe she didn't know who you were but no excuses for him.
It only goes to show what a nasty, thoughtless piece of work he really is.

It's still early days yet, you will get over this.

BigAunty

You should take comfort from the fact that she's clearly not his type and that they felt a need to humiliate you which has a basis insecurity and a desire to show-off. That was really immature behaviour and another demonstration of why you deserve better. Yes, they rubbed your nose in it but it's just more proof of lack of integrity on his part.

Pollycat

BigAunty wrote: »

You should take comfort from the fact that she's clearly not his type and that they felt a need to humiliate you which has a basis insecurity and a desire to show-off. That was really immature behaviour and another demonstration of why you deserve better. Yes, they rubbed your nose in it but it's just more proof of lack of integrity on his part.

She (the new flame) may not know about Vodkachick's relationship.
My ex came into our local (the pub my new partner and I used after I split up with my husband) with a much younger girl & proceeded to snog her face off.
She clearly didn't know who I was and I could have curled up in embarrassed for her.

System

Seeing them with someone else is always hard. The first time i saw my ex with the woman he cheated on me with and left me for, i just completely broke down (possibly more due to the fact we were apparently on a break and he'd made me think we'd get back together, so seeing them confirmed it was over for good)

If current ex starts seeing anyone then i'm going to have to cut off contact as i can't handle it (we're still on speaking terms atm)

I'm hoping it gets better, it's still early days. I've felt utterly broken the last 3 weeks, so i sympathize completely.

vodkachick68

Pollycat wrote: »

She (the new flame) may not know about Vodkachick's relationship.
My ex came into our local (the pub my new partner and I used after I split up with my husband) with a much younger girl& proceeded to snog her face off.
She clearly didn't know who I wad and I could have curled up in embarrassed for her.

Do you know what, I nearly went over to him and asked him why he is seeing someone else as he's technically never finished with me. But I'm glad I kept my dignity and walked away as he probably would have expected me to do that. I shall now walk in that pub head held high in future and sod them both!! Didn't take him long to find someone else though I now suspect he has probably been seeing her a while...the cheating t**t! I will probably never know the answer.

Now to try and move on yet again,no man will be entering my life for a long while.

Pollycat

vodkachick68 wrote: »

Do you know what, I nearly went over to him and asked him why he is seeing someone else as he's technically never finished with me. But I'm glad I kept my dignity and walked away as he probably would have expected me to do that. I shall now walk in that pub head held high in future and sod them both!! Didn't take him long to find someone else though I now suspect he has probably been seeing her a while...the cheating t**t! I will probably never know the answer.

Now to try and move on yet again,no man will be entering my life for a long while.

I'm so glad you kept your dignity too, vodkachick.

As I said above, it was a big test and, although it clearly hit you hard, it's one thing you're never going to have to face again (the first time you see them together) so you have moved forward, even if it's only a tiny step.

Kim_kim

xXMessedUpXx wrote: »

If current ex starts seeing anyone then i'm going to have to cut off contact as i can't handle it (we're still on speaking terms atm)

I'm hoping it gets better, it's still early days. I've felt utterly broken the last 3 weeks, so i sympathize completely.

If you feel bad, don't you think seeing them prolongs this?