Wedding present- how much?

ska_lover

This thread got me thinking, is it bad to sell or donate (or otherwise get rid of) unwanted wedding gifts?

Brighton_belle

ska_lover wrote: »

This thread got me thinking, is it bad to sell or donate (or otherwise get rid of) unwanted wedding gifts?

Think of it this way: It's just a 'thing' with no feelings of its own. The feeling we attach to belongings can be held separately - gratitude, appreciation,love, memories.
The alternative is to live with things you don't make us feel good in some way and too many of them can become a burden.

Liz3yy

I got married last year and as far as presents were concerned we weren't fussed and asked our guests for cash or vouchers if they felt they really wanted to give us something.

On the day we received cash and vouchers ranging in value from £10 to £50 which we were delighted with but didn't expect. One friend who had already forked out to travel to the UK from Belgium gave us £200 and a beautiful letter he'd clearly spent some time writing. We were flabagasted and made sure we thanked him profusely before he headed back home, he simply said it was nothing and that if good friends cannot spoil each other than what's the world coming to?

I personally think that £50 is an acceptable amount to give as a wedding gift whether you're invited to the ceremony or just the reception

andygb

I would buy a work colleague a drink (or put a fiver into the envelope with the card - if I liked them, if I didn't, then I would get rid of the loose change which was making my wallet heavy), or a maximum of £30 to £50 for a relative or friend.

*Louise*

stormbreaker wrote: »

.

Can any recent brides/grooms give me a wee idea of what they received as presents from Aunts and Uncles?

We received £100 from our aunt's/uncles. Not that we have loads of them but that seemed to be a trend among them all.

At a cousins wedding last year we spent £50 on the gift, that seemed an acceptable amount. If It was a closer relative then I would give a bit more unless I had already spent hundreds to attend.

DKLS

Simply gift whatever you can afford or feel comfortable with. The last wedding I went to the gift our gift was the price of a good meal at their honeymoon location.

I went to a asian colleagues wedding last year and quite liked the tradition of all the men lining up to handover cash which helps when you have 2,500 guests for the reception!

Very impressive to see how you can feed that number of people in the space of 3 hours.

jackyann

I have a soft spot for the (I believe now defunct) Breton tradition of the family & village giving money in advance to the bride's parents to pay for the wedding. I went to one about 50 years ago and was astonished at how much pleasure it gave everyone to criticise how their money had been spent!! Another minefield!

vegasvisitor

I hadn't been to weddings for quite a while (except family which can be different), so when I was recently invited to a wedding I asked someone younger what the current etiquette is around here. It was a fairly simple answer. £50 per couple for an evening invite, £100 per couple for a day invite. So we bought a £50 gift from their list as we were going to the evening do. It was 6 teaplates, so didn't seem like much, but at least it was something they wanted as it was on their list.

Only time we have spent more then these sort of amounts is when it has been someone close. I also spent less when it was an evening invite of a colleague (possibly courtesy invite) and I wasn't attending.

seven-day-weekend

We are going to a wedding next month of two young people, the bride is the daughter of close friends. My husband, along with the bride's father, is 'the band'.

We are giving them an original framed pastel drawing, by my husband, of a little place in Wales that we know they love and where we have all been on holiday together. Doesn't cost much at all, but we know they will love it.

I too think this whole wedding paraphernalia has got out of hand. If that is what the couple want, then fine, but don't expect your guests to subsidise it. The OP should give what they feel happy giving, whatever that amount is.

Georgiegirl256

seven-day-weekend wrote: »

We are going to a wedding next month of two young people, the bride is the daughter of close friends. My husband, along with the bride's father, is 'the band'.

We are giving them an original framed pastel drawing, by my husband, of a little place in Wales that we know they love and where we have all been on holiday together. Doesn't cost much at all, but we know they will love it.

I too think this whole wedding paraphernalia has got out of hand. If that is what the couple want, then fine, but don't expect your guests to subsidise it. The OP should give what they feel happy giving, whatever that amount is.

I love art, so if someone had of gave me something like that, I would have loved it! I even quite like the Welsh love spoon mention on previous pages.

Yes, they aren't everyone's cup of tea, but it's something you can keep and treasure long after the toaster has blew up and the towels have gone thread bare or past their best.

I too think this whole wedding gift/money/money for honeymoon thing has got out of hand.

Personally, I think it's fairly rude to expect your guests to give you money. Those little poems put inside invitations, they're meant to be cute, but IMO they're anything but. I think there's a lot of expectation around weddings nowadays.