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my husband doesnt find me attractive

ILoveEoin
ILoveEoin Posts: 258 Forumite
in Marriage, relationships & families
My hubby broke the news that he still loves me but doesn't find me attractive. What do I do? am so angry but I can see his point?!?
marriage is finding that one special person that you can annoy for the rest of your life:)
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Comments

  • Tigsteroonie
    Tigsteroonie Posts: 24,954 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 10,000 Posts Name Dropper Photogenic
    I'd take him to A&E. After you've broken both his legs.
    :heartpuls Mrs Marleyboy :heartpuls

    MSE: many of the benefits of a helpful family, without disadvantages like having to compete for the tv remote

    :) Proud Parents to an Aut-some son :)
  • houseimprover
    houseimprover Posts: 301 Forumite
    Work on yourself? Would you rather he not be honest and if you can see the point maybe you have let yourself go a bit?

    Though, what about him? Has he held himself together ok or maybe you can both help each other?
  • fairy_lights
    fairy_lights Posts: 9,220 Forumite
    Do you still find HIM attractive?
  • Georgiegirl256
    Georgiegirl256 Posts: 7,005 Forumite
    At least he's being honest. Would you rather he lie? Have you let yourself go lately?

    Sorry if I'm being blunt, just the first questions that popped into mind.
  • BrassicWoman
    BrassicWoman Posts: 3,219 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 1,000 Posts Name Dropper Mortgage-free Glee!
    leave and be happy. You don't need this in your life.
    2021 GC £1365.71/ £2400
  • ILoveEoin
    ILoveEoin Posts: 258 Forumite
    Yes I have let myself go but to be fair I was blind to it living in my own wee bubble. I just found it massive shock as it was very out of blue:(
    marriage is finding that one special person that you can annoy for the rest of your life:)
  • Hermia
    Hermia Posts: 4,473 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 1,000 Posts Combo Breaker
    I think you need to find out what exactly he means by that. Does he mean that the sexual part of the relationship has died and he sees you more as a friend he loves? Or have you changed over the course of the relationship (e.g. did you put a lot of effort into your appearance in the early days and now you slop around in scruffy clothes)? Has he always kept fit and healthy and you have put weight on and he perhaps resents that?

    It's a hurtful thing to say, but maybe better to say it rather than allow the relationship to slowly die when it is a problem that could be addressed.
  • purpleshoes_2
    purpleshoes_2 Posts: 2,653 Forumite
    ILoveEoin wrote: »
    Yes I have let myself go but to be fair I was blind to it living in my own wee bubble. I just found it massive shock as it was very out of blue:(

    When you say let yourself go do you mean put on weight?
  • houseimprover
    houseimprover Posts: 301 Forumite
    BrassicWoman wrote: »
    leave and be happy. You don't need this in your life.
    On what logic? The OP has admitted the husband is right, should he not say anything at all?
  • balletshoes
    balletshoes Posts: 16,610 Forumite
    ILoveEoin wrote: »
    Yes I have let myself go but to be fair I was blind to it living in my own wee bubble. I just found it massive shock as it was very out of blue:(

    its ok to be shocked and angry - your husband has been honest with you, he still loves you. So this can be turned around, right?
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