marriage in trouble

tayforth

I wish you luck too, lonelyguy. I have been where you are, it's a stomach-churning feeling. But it sounds as if you're making the right decision, and life can only get better.

Please come back on when you can and let us know that you're ok.

meritaten

my thoughts are with you lonelyguy. It is a tough thing to do. but, from what you have said your wife thinks she can 'keep you sweet' by buying gifts and saying the right things. but, its the actions that count, not fine words. Stay strong and don't give in - I have a strong feeling that if you do then this could become some sort of insane 'merry-go-round' that you will never get off.

PlymouthMaid

Good luck. Just read the thread and, assuming there is nothing major that you haven't told us and that this has been going on a while, I would say that this was what Divorce was invented for. No point being an unhappy martyr to the cause of marriage.

lonelyguy

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lexington013

As one of the previous posters has said, no one will judge you if you change your mind.
I believe you do need some timeout to reflect and decide the best course of action.
Whatever the outcome you will have support from the posters on here including myself.
Best wishes.

PlymouthMaid

Promises are easy to make but not always to keep. If you do want to give it another chance then I think you have to set a time period in your own head and re-evaluate the relationship or these things drift along and you will still be unhappy and she may think she has got away with it again and can carry on as before.

savingmummy

lonelyguy wrote: »

Having a time out talking. I told her how I felt. She broke down in tears and I did too.
She said she loves me more than anything and will do anything to make things better.
the question I am asking myself is that even if that happens can I get over all of the past and be the person she needs? If I still harbour resentment then it is not fair on her.
why does this have to be so difficult??? I do love her very much but I just dont think I can make her happy with where I am with everything :-(

Its a shame she hasn`t done this sooner!


IF she changes and your marriage gets back on track you would probably put all this behind you.
BUT you `may` always be wary around her, and feel the need to be `better` incase you go back to how things were!


You don`t think you can make her happy? Then you clearly have that hanging over you aswell! You can only be you!


Did you tell her you felt like this marriage had come to an end? or did you just open up how you felt?

Hanging_by_a_thread

meritaten wrote: »

Stay strong and don't give in - I have a strong feeling that if you do then this could become some sort of insane 'merry-go-round' that you will never get off.

This advice is spot on. Sorry to say it OP but this was also my gut reaction whilst reading through your thread.

Mrs_Z

Hanging_by_a_thread wrote: »

This advice is spot on. Sorry to say it OP but this was also my gut reaction whilst reading through your thread.

Could not agree more - do not give into her emotional blackmail. Once you have made up your mind, stick to it. It will be hard but in the long term you are giving you a chance to be happy.

Hope it all goes ok.

lonelyguy

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