Is there any way to motivate the missus to lose weight? Running out of ideas...

paulineb_2

Georgiegirl256 wrote: »

Barring any illness, conditions, physcological issues, which of course obviously do exist for some overweight people, I do think the majority of people do need a good dose of Will power and to stop making excuses.

I don't know if I would class people as lazy or greedy, that's quite harsh, and I know it isn't easy, but I would say that the majority don't really do anything to help themselves. Now that might sound harsh, but IMO it's truthful. How many overweight people can truthfully say that when they decided to try and lose weight that they gave it their all? They try for a few days, a week or two maybe, and then gradually the 'bad foods' creep back in, and then the excuses come, I know, because I've been there myself, albeit with a different addiction. Yes, there have been plenty of success stories, but that is through a lot of hard work, a lifestyle change, and a determination to want to do something about their weight and health.

I've seen it time and time again, my husband being a prime example. I've lost count of the amount of 'diets' he has been on....to watch someone slowly getting bigger and bigger, and potentionally killing themselves with food is heartbreaking. I've heard every excuse in the book, "after Easter" is the latest one....

Im sure it is heartbreaking to watch someone kill themselves with food. Ive never been in that position and it must be awful. But I think that if someone is in denial and trotting out excuse after excuse, willpower isnt whats going to fix them. Its gone past that, because its clear that your husband cant or wont clean up his diet on his own or even with support.

Personally speaking, when I was bigger than I am now, I felt absolutely crap about myself. 18 months ago my BMI was horrendous and I knew it, but I did nothing about it. The thing is, dieting and gaining and dieting and gaining can make you feel worse about yourself. Its a temporary fix, unless you clean up your diet and exercise if you need to, it probably will go back on.

It could be anything that sparks someone who has dieted and failed in the past to stop killing themselves with food. When someone starts a healthy eating plan its very possible they find they do have a lot of willpower, its the getting to that stage that they want to start it thats the problem.

The will to change things if you like.

lostinrates

onlyroz wrote: »

The fact is that there are many more obese people than there were 30-40 years ago. This cannot just be down to "slow metabolisms" or genuine health conditions that I am sure do affect some people.
.

There is a truth in this.

But I don't think it related JUST to weight issues.

Other examples things that it relates to which I think might be symptoms of similar problems are some types of debt and overspending problems for example, and people who buy more clothes than they can ever need.

I think one of the reasons this is more common is simply the available money. Poverty is not the same as poverty thirty or forty years ago either, and there is ( thankfully) more support for most which as well as being helpful allows poor choices to made along side the ones that keep people safe.

quidsy

You also have to look at how our food has changed from 40-50 years ago. Much more processed, much more hidden fats, trans fats etc, it ISN'T just as a simple as people eating too much.

paulineb_2

lostinrates wrote: »

There is a truth in this.

But I don't think it related JUST to weight issues.

Other examples things that it relates to which I think might be symptoms of similar problems are some types of debt and overspending problems for example, and people who buy more clothes than they can ever need.

I think one of the reasons this is more common is simply the available money. Poverty is not the same as poverty thirty or forty years ago either, and there is ( thankfully) more support for most which as well as being helpful allows poor choices to made along side the ones that keep people safe.

Or the availability of junk food, cheaply. Its not just what people eat that makes them fat, if someone drank 2 litres of cola a day, thats a lot of calories.

Alcohol as well, it all adds up. We lead more sedentary lives as well.

lostinrates

paulineb wrote: »

Or the availability of junk food, cheaply. Its not just what people eat that makes them fat, if someone drank 2 litres of cola a day, thats a lot of calories.

Alcohol as well, it all adds up. We lead more sedentary lives as well.

Yes, I am sometimes amazed at the impact of junk food.

Over Winter I trialled the sort of diet they put some ibs patients on. It was devastating for me. As the poster above with pcos and ibs and fibro mentions, a lOt of it is white and carby, and as I read the diet sheet I told them....I cannot eat this, its contraindicated with PCOS and my other health issues.....

For a lot of the time I ended up eating three slices of white toast a day because they insisted I MUST trial eating something three times a day and it MUST be commercial bought stuff for their records.

The weight put on during this period is partly what's got me having tests for this new condition:(

Anoneemoose

lostinrates wrote: »

Yes, I am sometimes amazed at the impact of junk food.

Over Winter I trialled the sort of diet they put some ibs patients on. It was devastating for me. As the poster above with pcos and ibs and fibro mentions, a lOt of it is white and carby, and as I read the diet sheet I told them....I cannot eat this, its contraindicated with PCOS and my other health issues.....

For a lot of the time I ended up eating three slices of white toast a day because they insisted I MUST trial eating something three times a day and it MUST be commercial bought stuff for their records.

The weight put on during this period is partly what's got me having tests for this new condition:(

I feel for you! It is so awful isn't it??

If you eat well for your ibs, you gain weight at a rate of knots because of the insulin resistance from the PCOS!!

lostinrates

Anoneemoose wrote: »

I feel for you! It is so awful isn't it??

If you eat well for your ibs, you gain weight at a rate of knots because of the insulin resistance from the PCOS!!

I don't have ibs I don't think, we were trialling the diet to see if it might help , but it didn't and infact made things worse.

But it was a fundamentally awful way to eat. I have given up food entirely before and felt better.

.

I'm several times over confounded, I have pcos , hypothyroidism, a problem with one and now possibly a second area in my brain which impact on metabolic function. I have an inconceivably low metabolic rate which was the talk of the hospital years and years ago when I was hospitalised and fed in such a way it was absolutely guaranteed I was not getting nutrition in a way other than at the hospital's control.

Ironically I find I am still somewhat fattist and my own worst enemy in making decisions for vanity over health often. I miss running, and riding, and swimming and yoga. I miss being able to be strong enough to go out reliably by myself ...though I have made tremendous progress in recent years I slip back, and always seemingly at this time of year. , maybe it just feel worse to feel worse at the beginning of the good 'doing stuff' weather.


I have really realised though how people are treated. I was more popular with men plumper than I felt good, which was interesting. I still get chatted up a bit. .

There is no question I'd choose my fitness and body back over some of the other impacts , which is I think a pretty sad reflection on me and how it feels to be overweight.

Tink2

seven-day-weekend wrote: »

Don't we all try to hide the bad things we do?

No........

victory

tink2 wrote: »

no........

:a:a:a:a:a

FatVonD

lostinrates wrote: »

I don't have ibs I don't think, we were trialling the diet to see if it might help , but it didn't and infact made things worse.

Not offering medical advice but... I have believed for 3 or 4 years that I had IBS and have just found out that I *probably* have Coeliac Disease, a diet of just bread would have done that to me too.

I am still awaiting the results of the biopsies but having read a list of the symptoms and knowing that's what they suspect and were testing for as soon as the biopsies were taken I cut out gluten (about a month ago) and every single symptom has disappeared.