Is there any way to motivate the missus to lose weight? Running out of ideas...

Tink2

heartbreak_star wrote: »

There we go

HBS x

What veg does not have carbs?

As for exercise, someone who is 5-6 stone overweight could lose weight with no exercise but just getting moving would help OPs wife lose weight

Cloudydaze

Tink2 wrote: »

What veg does not have carbs?

I wouldn't get hung up on the carb content of vegetables. Apart from potatoes, you can't go wrong with stuffing your face with veggies. The green ones are generally best.

paulineb_2

supersaver2 wrote: »

You really don't know that I haven't been in a situation that required an emotional crutch. Over the past 2 years I've been through an extremely difficult time with my very young daughter, 2 major surgeries and over a year hospital stay, I would imagine that could be classed as an emotional time. I personally feel plenty of people do make excuses, I'm not denying that people are suffering with genuine eating disorders, whether that is over or under eating, I just think people jump on the band wagon so to speak.

I suffered from work related stress for 12 years due to bullying in the workplace. I changed jobs 4 times to try and make my life better, eventually I changed career altogether and Im now self employed. At times when my stress/anxiety was at its worst, leaving the house was a massive achievement. I also have unsupportive GP's who basically left me to it even at times where I was physically threatened in the workplace (at one stage I was working with BT police traces on my work phone). I did a GP referral scheme (my GPs actually didnt refer me, my practice refused to stamp the form but the leisure centre took people who fitted the criteria without the stamp). That helped me a lot, but there have been times since when Ive come unstuck due to more work related stress (before I went self employed), where my confidence went, I put on weight, felt too self conscious to exercise, more weight went on.

Life is the way it is for some people. Under times of stress some people wont eat. Some will overeat. Some will manage to keep up an exercise routine and eat healthily, which is the best thing they could do, but that's not what everyone does.

I dont lack willpower. I actually have much more willpower than I thought I ever had, having been eating as clean as I can and working out 4-5 times a week for the last year. Ive also had a couple of broken bones which didnt help, broke my tailbone a year and a half ago and for 6 months I did nothing more than swimming and walking.

For some people there will always be an emotional connection to food. Others who may not have had that might struggle to understand that but it clearly exists.

Dare I say it, I dont think many people get to 5 and 6 stones overweight and more than that and are happy with themselves.

Edited to say, Im 16 kilos lighter than I was this time last year and I think if this woman is 5 stones overweight, even losing 2 stones will make her feel much better, small targets like a half stone at a time will help.

lostinrates

Re workplace stress...
My DH who had anorexia in his teens and whose tendency gets lots of compliments when he drops weight. He finds it really odd and unsettling as he knows he's just ' showing his stress' by not eating. Inversely one of his workplace chums is a definite comfort eater. They can be under similar work place stress but DH is getting praised and compliments, his chum not, and DH says he sees a real inequality and how the self image problem for chum makes him 'hungrier' . ( they are both men fwiw and talk about food / eating/ health and gym a fair bit)

Mojisola

supersaver2 wrote: »

It seems most people can't take responsibility for themselves, there always has to be someone or an emotional problem to blame. Never seems to be that maybe they lack willpower and just like to eat rubbish!

I don't think there is always an emotional problem behind over-eating. Some people just like to eat lots of food; others genuinely don't realise just how much they are eating throughout the day.

But if there is an emotional problem being dealt with by over-eating or under-eating, dieting is not going to work.

Simple things like making a note of exactly what you eat for a week or taking a photo of everything before you eat it can be enough to break the cycle of unconscious eating.

Other very simple techniques like having smaller plates and bowls, putting snacks away in a high cupboard so you can't just grab one in passing without thinking, only eating when you're not doing anything else (on the computer, in front of the TV, walking round the shops, etc) all help to bring the amount of food you're consuming to the fore.

However, none of these techniques will work if you've got a secret stash that you dive into when you're upset or if you buy something on the way home, eat it and hide the wrappers from the family - this is akin to an alcoholic having bottles tucked away around the house and shows that the eating (or not eating, in the case of an anorexic) is a symptom, not the problem itself. Without help to sort out that problem, no amount of dietary advice will be effective.

heartbreak_star

Supersaver2 - hope all is well now. Mojisola and paulineb have both put it far better than I could - even I don't think all overeating is a mental health issue, but your post that I responded to tarred all people with food issues with the same brush, IMO...the brush of "just being lazy".

It's not always that

HBS x

Cloudydaze

heartbreak_star wrote: »

Supersaver2 - hope all is well now. Mojisola and paulineb have both put it far better than I could - even I don't think all overeating is a mental health issue, but your post that I responded to tarred all people with food issues with the same brush, IMO...the brush of "just being lazy".

It's not always that

HBS x

I agree lazy is the wrong word. Lacking in motivation & confidence is perhaps more appropriate.

heartbreak_star

Cloudydaze wrote: »

I agree lazy is the wrong word. Lacking in motivation & confidence is perhaps more appropriate.

Better. The eating is a symptom, not a cause, as was stated earlier I think.

HBS x

lostinrates

heartbreak_star wrote: »

Supersaver2 - hope all is well now. Mojisola and paulineb have both put it far better than I could - even I don't think all overeating is a mental health issue, but your post that I responded to tarred all people with food issues with the same brush, IMO...the brush of "just being lazy".

It's not always that

HBS x

Exactly.

I am overweight but not due to eating too much however I am also capable of eating too much for a non emotional reason. ( yesterday I had a biscuit I neither had planned on eating nor needed to eat, I just plain old wanted to eat it. I'd made them to have with coffee tonight and wanted to know if they tasted as good as I thought they would. It did. )


Food has known impacts on mood, both socially and I believe biochemically. Sadly the least beneficial food seems to give the most instant 'boost'. Isn't there meant to be something 'magic' about things like icecream which are matched in high sugar and high fat?

**professor~yaffle**

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z_jGgZ35W5s

:D