How do I live without him?

needmoney

margaretclare wrote:

that was when I fell in love with him because his first words were 'How was your day?'
turned up on my doorstep like a refugee, with all the worldly goods he could carry packed into his old rusty car. Mostly just his clothes in bin-bags, his tool-kit, his computer, desk and chair in bits on the roof-rack. He stood on the doorstep in the rain saying he had no job, no home, no money, no prospects, debts from the marriage, health problems....all I could say was 'oh come in, you silly beggar, don't let the cold air in and the warmth out!!' And the rest, as they say, is history. That was 5th November 1997, he was divorced in June 1999, we were married on 14th January 2002, and we're still just as happy.
Best wishes to all
Aunty Margaret

What a lovely story, happy for you and very envious has he got a brother:D

margaretclare

needmoney wrote:

What a lovely story, happy for you and very envious has he got a brother:

Hi needmoney

Thanks for the nice words and image. Well, he has got a brother, 10 years younger but looks 10 years older, completely different, they don't get on, poles apart really! Just shows how different people can be, even close relatives. You really cannot tell.

We both took a terrible risk, especially me going into a Travelodge room to stay overnight with a man I'd only just met that day!! And me a respectable widow aged 62!! But it has all worked out wonderfully well.

Best wishes

Aunty Margaret

jazzyjustlaw

margaretclare wrote:

Hi needmoney

Thanks for the nice words and image. Well, he has got a brother, 10 years younger but looks 10 years older, completely different, they don't get on, poles apart really! Just shows how different people can be, even close relatives. You really cannot tell.

We both took a terrible risk, especially me going into a Travelodge room to stay overnight with a man I'd only just met that day!! And me a respectable widow aged 62!! But it has all worked out wonderfully well.

Best wishes

Aunty Margaret

Sometimes it has to be done. We are only human and I am sure you don't do it as a regular thing. I have done something similar. Life happens!!

Your still respectable if you ask me.

Glad your happy.
x

jaybee

margaretclare wrote:

Hi beth, and good luck to you

I think I was the 'angel on the net' for the man who is now my husband. He was being very badly-treated by second wifey - she turned frigid on him, wouldn't even hold his hand, was extravagant, was violent even and used to throw temper tantrums and hit him.

I picked up a message from him on a site I didn't normally visit - it was headed 'Older Guy'. He was the same age as me, 62, I was a lonely widow. We emailed back and forth, then he phoned me and that was when I fell in love with him because his first words were 'How was your day?' Life was very hard for me just then, I was struggling to survive after being widowed and redundant at the same time, I'd had 5 years of just trying to keep the roof over my head. Few people ever gave a good goddamn what sort of a day I'd had, and to hear this gentle male voice asking 'how was your day?' just blew me away.

We arranged to meet, I booked 24 hours in a Travelodge on the M1, we stayed together overnight. Then he came down to see me one day when wifey was off on a coach trip with her mates. 3 weeks after we first met he left and came here - turned up on my doorstep like a refugee, with all the worldly goods he could carry packed into his old rusty car. Mostly just his clothes in bin-bags, his tool-kit, his computer, desk and chair in bits on the roof-rack. He stood on the doorstep in the rain saying he had no job, no home, no money, no prospects, debts from the marriage, health problems....all I could say was 'oh come in, you silly beggar, don't let the cold air in and the warmth out!!' And the rest, as they say, is history. That was 5th November 1997, he was divorced in June 1999, we were married on 14th January 2002, and we're still just as happy.

Best wishes to all

Aunty Margaret

How lucky that you both found each other!

I am finding very heartening to hear of all the good developments coming out of bad relationships. PinkLipstickBabe - you will be one of them for sure - you're getting there already!!!

Hope everyone has a good weekend.

mightymo_2

A few years ago, I went out with a chap who was very controlling. He wasn't at first - of course, but slowly he started to change me. Before I knew it, I had dumped all my friends, would have to tell him my every move, he would take me to work and pick me up, we still lived with our parents then - but when I had left his house at an evening, he would ring me up at home to make sure I had gone there. He was constantly saying I was flirting with some guy, or that I fancied the chap who had just walked past. He even told me what clothes to wear - nothing too short, and any tops had to come up to my neck!! It became a nightmare!

Luckily we broke up - he dumped me - and although I was heart broken for ages, I am so glad it happened. He eventually left the Country with his family, but he has recently been in touch (just a friendly email - nothing else!!), and it seems that he hasn't changed at all. Thank goodness I was freed from him all those years ago!

There are a lot of lovely blokes out there. My partner now is absolutely wonderful. We have a lot of respect for each other, and really enjoy each others company.

Once you have had a controlling relationship - you know you will not put up with it again.

I hope you are feeling positive and have a wonderful weekend. You really can get through this. Remember "those who wish to sing, always find a song".

Mo xx

margaretclare

Hi all, and thanks for kind words!

Is anyone following the Shelley/Charlie storyline on 'Corrie'? A perfect example of 'controlling behaviour'. Shelley was vulnerable because she 'married' a bigamist and her sister recently died, so she was glad to have a strong man on her side. And he says loudly that he never hit a woman in his life. Maybe not, but he's controlling, jealous and intrusive - he just plays her as if she was his violin!! Wonder how that storyline is going to end.

Aunty Margaret

davidcampbell

what a fantastic story. thanks for sharing it margaret.

just shows that happiness is out there for us all, we just have to stop looking for it!!! easier said than done maybe

hugs to everyone

David
xx

libra10

We've been following the Coronation Street storyline and Charlie's behaviour is getting worse by the episode. He has managed to separate Shelley from her mother and friends. But, in Shelley's eyes, Charlie can do no wrong.

It's certainly a gripping story and we all hope Shelley will realise what is happening and show Charlie the door.

honey28

You might want him back but you dont NEED him back. You are doing so well, look at how far you have come in the past few weeks! :T

honey28

Ive posted previously on this thread - to cut a long story short i found out my husband had been having an affair. It ended,but he left me, to think things through - to work out if he wanted to be with me or not! He told me he needed a break from me to work out how he felt about me and I have (like a fool) waited for the past 3 months for him. Anyhow, today i found out that he had been on a date last night with another girl!! So much for thinking things through! I feel like such an idiot, for letting him walk over me for the past 3 months and basically have his cake and eat it. My friends told me that I was being too soft, letting him come and go and deep down i knew I was but I just wanted him back. Its hard to let go of something that you love so much