Wedding dilemma

19lottie82

Person_one wrote: »

its pretty rude to only invite one half of a married couple.

Don't feel you have to go if you'd rather not, but you might decide not to point out the irony of them expecting you to fork out and celebrate their marriage while they show no consideration or respect for yours.

surely this is a bit of an over reaction? The groom has already explained that spaces are limited.

as I mentioned, I am getting married in July and the invites to the wedding and meal are limited to 35. after my OH and I have invited all our family, there is only room for 5 friends between us.

I have quite a few good friends, but I am not close to their partners. If I wanted to invite them to my wedding when spaces were so limited I would have no hesitation in inviting them solo, but extending an invite to their partners for the evening do.

There's nothing rude about it, there just isn't enough space.

However, I would explain the situation to my friend, before I sent the invites out.

georgiesmum

I haven't heard of a person being invited to important events and their other half excluded. Sound terrible to me. Really bad manners. I would be livid if my dh was invited and not me. No matter what your wife says, she is bound to be offended.
Surely the couple should have seen how many people and their partners to invite and booked a room accordingly. Or just invited everybody to an evening do.

claire16c

I cant imagine inviting someone and not their partner, seems a bit rude to me.

But I guess it depends how well you know the groom. For example, say you are a work colleague, and they are inviting a tables worth of people from work, who all know each other, I can kind of see that would be ok.

But if theyve known you both for a long time I think thats just weird.

If people book somewhere thats really small then perhaps they should just invite family.

tea_lover

georgiesmum wrote: »

I haven't heard of a person being invited to important events and their other half excluded. Sound terrible to me. Really bad manners. I would be livid if my dh was invited and not me. No matter what your wife says, she is bound to be offended.

Really? I wouldn't give a monkeys (unless I was really, really good friends with the couple myself). If it was a friend of my OH's, I'd be pleased that he'd been invited and wave him off to have a good time. It wouldn't occur to me to be offended about not being invited myself.

catkins

It's entirely up to how you and your wife feel about it.


Personally I would not dream of going without my OH and I know he would feel the same

Luella-14_2

tea_lover wrote: »

Really? I wouldn't give a monkeys (unless I was really, really good friends with the couple myself). If it was a friend of my OH's, I'd be pleased that he'd been invited and wave him off to have a good time. It wouldn't occur to me to be offended about not being invited myself.

This. I've been to events without my OH, and he without me. If it were a couple we both were friendly with (shared dinner parties with, days out etc) then I'd find it a bit odd, but if it were a friend of my OH's I'd be fine with it. Especially if it were one of the "lads", or as said above work colleagues, then it's just a bit awkward to be there.

fawd1

Sorry but I think it's incredibly rude. It's fair enough if it's a partner they've only been with for a bit but for a spouse I think you invite both or don't invite at all. If there isn't enough space then maybe invite them to the evening bit or simply have a party at a later date in your own home with your close friends and their partners and keep the wedding to family only.

Edited to add: Unless maybe it's a work colleague like someone said and you'll be at a table with other colleagues, then that's not bad.

pops5588

I haven't met all my OH's friends and we have been together a long time. Two of his friends have got married since we met and I was invited to the wedding of the friend I have spent a lot of time with and I wasn't invited to the one where I didn't know the friend very well. I wasn't offended at all, I understand that some people are on a budget. Weddings are stressful enough to plan as it is, you're always going to upset someone! I wouldn't want to add any extra hassle onto anyone's plate even if it did offend me!

brenda10

Go enjoy yourself and if your wife is happy with that and you, go enjoy. I have done so in the past. You will have lots of time to catch up with old friends and leave as suits you. Enjoy.




Personally if I am not invited to a wedding I am more than happy, if asked I hate to offend and usually go if suitable. I would be glad not to be asked. Ha

GobbledyGook

I don't see the issue at all. If you want to go then go, if you don't then don't.

I think it's far less rude when people make a straight decision - no children, no other halves, aunts & uncles, but no cousins etc - than handpicking 'well their other half can come, but theirs can't'.

I don't think the stag do has anything to do with attending the wedding personally. I've been on Hen Do's when I couldn't make the wedding and I've even been on one where the couple were getting married just themselves with their 2 adult children as witnesses. If you want to go, and it's affordable for you, then go.