Someone has been withdrawing from my CC terrified is OH

asharon

True monkeyBalls, but then when people post on forums we are there to offer advice based on the info provided.

True often more info comes out and changes the advice given, but it does appear, with the info so far, as if it is likely the partner is lying.

Whatever, the truth, OP, I hope you get it sorted as that is a horrible situation to be in.

Hugs.

Monkeyballs

Hi Katgrit,

Thank you for sharing your story, it is powerful and speaks leagues for your integrity and also ability to do the right thing. Despite how you feel at the moment I know that you will be all right as you obviously have a good head on your shoulders and I wish you well for the future x

Hi ASharon,

I wasn't implying that people were not acting with Littlemadam's best interests at heart but so am I - reading through Katgrit's post above affirms this for me too, given the opportunity to come clean then there is a possibility of working through what might be a genuine mental problem for the other half.

That said, equally if he doesn't come clean and she can't believe/trust him (which would be reasonable based on what we know) or even if he does come clean and she can't forgive then that is her decision - I just don't think that everyone telling her to leave him regardless of the limited information is good advice, some problems can be worked through especially if you feel the other party is worth it.

MB

planteria

The_Boss wrote: »

Whoa there - I haven't suggested that he was an inch short of hitting her.

Whoa there - i didn't say you did.

E._Tenebris_Lux

Littlemadam83 wrote: »

...

In so so scared. My new job I can't afford to live alone.

I feel like I can't cope with this and just want my life to end.

Is anyone else a bit worried that nothing has been heard from the OP since she posted this on Saturday night..?

zagfles

I really hope most posters in this thread don't end up on a jury :eek:. There's a bit of circumstantial evidence that it was the OP's OH, but there's no proof whatsoever. Maybe it's the most likely explanation, but there could be any number of other explanations.

A visitor to the house could have swiped it, perhaps together with the PIN reminder, or perhaps the PIN is some easily guessable number (such as the last 4 digits of phone number), or a number which other people need to be told such as the burglar alarm code.

Maybe the card was dropped in the drive and the postman found it, contacted the bank to order a PIN reminder and intercepted it, and any statements.

Maybe the card was left in supermarket having just been used, picked up by the person behind the OP in the queue who also saw the PIN she entered.

Maybe the OP has a porch which is usually unlocked into which the post is delivered and so easily taken. In any case the OP doesn't say that the transactions occurred over multiple statement periods.

Maybe all the above are less likely explanations, but until they are ruled out I'd suggest the OP ignores those who suggest she destroys her relationship based on a bit of circumstantial evidence. Give her OH the benefit of the doubt, make it clear she will insist to the bank and police that she did not authorise the transactions, and let the bank (and police if necessary) do their job. Drop a few hints about the bank saying there's CCTV evidence. If the OH did indeed do it he's likely to confess.

A friend of mine was in a similar situation. He suspected it might be a member of his family but there was no way he was going in all guns blazing accusing the most likely culprit without solid evidence, there was no way he was going to risk his relationship with the family member in that way.

So he told everyone that the bank contacted him saying they have CCTV evidence of card being used, and before handing it over to the police they wanted him to sign a statement saying he didn't authorise the use of the card, and he was nipping into the bank the next day to do this.

He got a confession within an hour, but it wasn't who he suspected!

The_Boss

Please do come back and let us know how you got on

wannabe_credit_free

Sorry you find yourself in this position and its obvious he is the culprit. You need to employ damage limitation and force him to get the help, he badly needs, else he will end up in serious trouble and take you with him. I would cut up the card and seek advice from a debt counselor fast....Good luck.

iAMaLONDONER

zagfles wrote: »

I really hope most posters in this thread don't end up on a jury :eek:. There's a bit of circumstantial evidence that it was the OP's OH, but there's no proof whatsoever. Maybe it's the most likely explanation, but there could be any number of other explanations.

A visitor to the house could have swiped it, perhaps together with the PIN reminder, or perhaps the PIN is some easily guessable number (such as the last 4 digits of phone number), or a number which other people need to be told such as the burglar alarm code.

Maybe the card was dropped in the drive and the postman found it, contacted the bank to order a PIN reminder and intercepted it, and any statements.

Maybe the card was left in supermarket having just been used, picked up by the person behind the OP in the queue who also saw the PIN she entered.

Maybe the OP has a porch which is usually unlocked into which the post is delivered and so easily taken. In any case the OP doesn't say that the transactions occurred over multiple statement periods.

Maybe all the above are less likely explanations, but until they are ruled out I'd suggest the OP ignores those who suggest she destroys her relationship based on a bit of circumstantial evidence. Give her OH the benefit of the doubt, make it clear she will insist to the bank and police that she did not authorise the transactions, and let the bank (and police if necessary) do their job. Drop a few hints about the bank saying there's CCTV evidence. If the OH did indeed do it he's likely to confess.

A friend of mine was in a similar situation. He suspected it might be a member of his family but there was no way he was going in all guns blazing accusing the most likely culprit without solid evidence, there was no way he was going to risk his relationship with the family member in that way.

So he told everyone that the bank contacted him saying they have CCTV evidence of card being used, and before handing it over to the police they wanted him to sign a statement saying he didn't authorise the use of the card, and he was nipping into the bank the next day to do this.

He got a confession within an hour, but it wasn't who he suspected!

Who did the confession come from?

zagfles

iAMaLONDONER wrote: »

Who did the confession come from?

A member of his family but not the one he suspected. Luckily he wasn't stupid enough to throw accusations around without proof, as most people on this thread seem to be advising.

Stranger956

Littlemadam83

Due to the interest created, are you able to provide an outcome to your predicament ?